Summary: Sayid and Shannon discover that it's okay to bring their relationship out into the open. Shayid, written before Deus Ex Machina.
Disclaimer: All places, things, and people (except Charlie; he's MINE! kicks and screams as people in white lab coats take me away) belong to the genius behind Lost (and Alias, and Felicity, and... yeah, you get the picture), J.J. Abrams. The song belongs to its writer, who will be revealed at the end of this fic.
Spoilers: This was written before Deus Ex Machina. There. Nothing in that episode happened in my story.
Like Never Before
We might kiss when we are alone
When nobody's watching
We might take it home
We might make out
When nobody's there…
The best time of the day is at night.
Everyone is at either the beach of the caves, and it is quiet. For a few precious hours, there are no threats of the invisible monster or the Others. Nobody is blaming someone for stealing the last of their water or bananas, and for once no one needs something from the Sawyer Store, as we have named his tent. We sit by the fires, weaving tales of who we were before Oceanic Flight 815 took off and took our old lives away from us. Michael stops work on his second boat for the night, going to sit and talk with Walt before he goes to sleep. Charlie sits by the fire and strums a few chords on his guitar some nights, Claire making up words by his side.
Rousseau's papers are put away for the night. Most of the text has been translated, but there's still some left to be figured out. It was only a short time with the guy in Saint Tropez, after all.
The two of us sit on the beach, away from the other survivors. Sometimes we bring some fruit with us to share, but mostly we stare out into the ocean, our hands entwined. One of us will occasionally murmur something incoherent to the other, and then there will be the kiss that always follows, whether the words uttered were romantic or not.
I'm not sure if we seclude ourselves because we like the privacy or because we're trying to hide our relationship from the rest of the survivors. She is terrified that Boone will discover us and come after me for being with his sister, even after his warning.
It still amazes me that she kissed me by the fire that night so many nights ago. "Everyone gets anew life on this island," she said. We both got ours that night; one with each other.
It's not that we're scared
It's just that it's delicate
Sayid thinks I'm scared of Boone finding out about us. I just say that because Sayid is scared, and he likes to think that I am, too.
Frankly, I don't give a damn about what my stupid brother thinks about us. I know he's worried about me and all, but really, I can take care of myself! I mean, come on I was freaking married! True, the guy was a bastard, and he did everything that I asked, but I was fine by myself! I don't really think that Sayid will leave me for the next sexy thing that strolls down the beach. Kate's all lovey-dovey with Jack, Claire's with Charlie, and I don't know about Sun and her husband. I guess they haven't made up yet after whatever happened with them the day I kissed Sayid.
I can still remember that night so well. Locke had told me not to bother with what Boone was saying, and I took the words of our resident swami to heart.
I don't regret what I did at all. It was a long time coming, we both said. We knew it was inevitable from the first night of translating.
We may be dating, and we might not. If we are, it's like no relationship I've ever been in. There's no fancy restaurant or movie theater to go to here on Craphole Island. All we can do is go into the jungle and try to get eaten be the stupid monster!
Wait, scratch that. Hurley has some dumb idea that we should have a party (a luau, of course) to get our minds off of the Crazy French Chick and to have some fun. Anything is good if I can wear the shoes Sayid gave me. I love being able to look nicer than everyone.
I'm almost expecting Sayid to ask me to it. He might not, though.
Going to the luau together would bring our relationship out into the open. Boone will see us together, and then he'll blow.
I don't care, though. I want all this secrecy and night visits to be over with. Even though it's gotten me some very nice kisses.
We might live like never before
When there's nothing to give
Well how can we ask for more
We might make love in some sacred place…
I'm not sure if I will be asking Shannon to the luau. I want to very much, and I'm not worrit that she won't accept, but if we go together, Boone will most certainly come after me. After he would remind me of his 'warning,' he would most likely gather up Shannon and their belongings and head to the caves. I'd surely kill myself is she's gone because of what I did; I look forward to the time I spend with her every day.
She's the best thing that's happened to me on this island.
We deserve to be able to be open about our relationship. Jack can be with Kate and Charlie with Claire whenever they wish. They don't have an over-protective brother breathing down their necks all the time. I have to watch my back whenever I'm with Shannon, even when we're busy at work translating. There's no chance of sitting next to each other at the fire at night when Boone is around.
He was wrong about Shannon. She may have been the kind of woman to use men, but that must have been the before the island. The old Shannon is gone, replaced with someone who does her share of the work. Translating Rousseau's maps has been a hard task, but she's been working as hard as she can.
Of course, there's also the fact that I gave her that pair of shoes. She can wear them to the luau.
The look of your face
Is delicate
Sayid asked me to the luau early this morning as we were taking our the papers that needed to be translated. It was really casual, too. Nothing I would've expected. He just came right out and asked me. Very blunt and to-the-point. Very Sayid. I liked it.
Of course I said yes. I wouldn't give up spending time with him for anything. Not even the last bottle of conditioner on this island. Which of course is in my tent.
Hurley thought we should have the luau on the beach, to provide more of a tropical atmosphere. Those who didn't want to go had to go to the caves and watch over everything there. Yesterday Claire and I made some 'decorations,' and Locke surprised us with tiki torches. He found a way to make candles.
I spent about two hours getting ready this afternoon. There's only so much you can do on an island. If I were at home, it would've taken me at least four. I put on my best makeup, and my black mini. I offered to do Claire's makeup, but she refused. Of course I wore the shoes. They were a little tight, but I managed to squeeze my feet into them.
We set up plates of bananas and all those fruits Kate and Jack bring back with them , and everyone got some. Charlie took out his guitar and serenaded us with what must have been a song from his band. Later on, Hurley took over the guitar after wrestling it from Charlie (I didn't even know he could play) and played a song I could've sworn they played at my prom. Jack and Kate went over away from everyone else and started making out, and Charlie grabbed Claire and danced with her. I sat alone on the sand, until I felt something pick me up and hands went around my waist. I guess Sayid thought it was time to reveal our relationship.
He grabbed me and my hands went around his neck. We swayed to the music, our eyes on each other. I could hear gasps from the other survivors, but there was no Boone coming up and wrenching us apart. He must have had a change of heart.
Sayid suddenly started whispering something in my ear. I couldn't tell what he saw saying until he started to sing. Of course I recognized it as 'La Mer.'
This caught me by surprise. When we were at his desk working, I'd try to get him to sing, and he never would. Something inside changed him.
We both knew that it would be okay; everybody else knew about us, and we could be ourselves.
So why do you fill my sorrow
With the words you've borrowed
From the only place you've known
And why do you sing Hallelujah
If it means nothing to you
Why do you sing with me at all?
We know that we are going to make it through anything that happens on the island. If it's good or band, we'll be there. Together.
Author' note: The song is 'Delicate' by Damien Rice. Any Lostaway should recognize it. Thanks to Rory for reading this in school, and to Becca for reading it even though you don't watch Lost.