No infringement of copyright intended, I am just playing in the Dresden universe without intent to profit only to entertain
A Difference of Perception
By Hrothbert of Bainbridge(transcribed by Domino Falling)
Winifred, diplomat, teacher, immortal sorceress, was no great beauty but her sparkling wit and intelligent resolve had the kings and princes of Europe bending at the knee and listening devotedly to her every word. Winifred came to the English Court in which I served and she charmed all there. When I was with her I became her jester to win her laughter, her knight to win her favour, her lover to answer her passion, and when we were apart I pined and ached to be in her presence once again. So how did this come about, how did the dour Lord Bainbridge become the lover of this woman? I will tell.
Some murmured that she had enchanted me, a Lord of England so smitten with this woman of magical power, but if she had used magic, why me, why not the King or some other man, higher in his royal favour, who could reward her more? No, my Winifred had enchanted me with her love and I worshipped her as my second god, she was the goddess of my heart – that was the only magic involved.
The French King had sent Winifred to our court to talk of peace and trade, many of the lords knew her reputation as an adept of the magic arts and so feared her, I as one who also practiced magic was chosen as her natural liaison, and as time would tell the liaison became very natural indeed.
I well remember the first time I saw her at Court, we Lords had come at the King's bidding to assemble for the Privy Council and Lady Winifred entered to speak of France and England and how they should resolve their woes, and elegantly she spoke too, in her strongly accented English. She was tall for a woman, over five and one half feet, I am a tall man, so find taller women less of a strain on the neck. Winifred soon charmed and won the Council with the King of France's message of affection for our own King, and though some of what was proposed would require much negotiation, it was an appropriate supplication to the needs of our throne, so she was welcomed.
I observed Winifred in her blue dress, jewels sparkling in her auburn hair and soon realised that she was watching me also, her eyes, which should have been only for our King, secretly strayed to look at me on more than one occasion during her speech. Not easily flattered I wondered what warranted this attention from the French Emissary.
Eventually the meeting was dissolved and we were dismissed until the afternoon. The day was happily a warm one, so it was proposed we stroll in the gardens before the midday meal. Winifred chose to walk beside me.
"Lord Bainbridge," She addressed me, I noticed her eyes were a charming grey with a little blue edge round the iris, her eyes were blessed with pleasing laughter lines so I judged Winifred was quick to mirth.
"My Lady Winifred," I gave her a formal half bow, and I could not help but add a very broad smile, the French were very clever to send such a charming woman to a court so ruled by men.
"I know very little of your England, I do hope you will be kind and guide me into making few errors in my diplomacy?" And she honoured me with that delicious smile of hers.
"I am sure your King would not send an innocent to negotiate so many matters of great import my Lady," She began to frown. "…I mean that as a compliment, and to assure you that I would prefer honesty to Courtly flattery, I think proceedings will progress far more quickly if we speak plainly of those matters before us." I smiled to soften the words.
"You are probably right, I will save my courtly ways for the Court, and court you, My Lord, with plain speech. However, I have no wish to rush through our negotiations but desire to spend time learning of the great Lord Bainbridge, I am told you are very gifted and I am sure I have much to learn from you."
"I thank you for your candour and your flattery. And yes, I will guide you in our ways, providing it compromise not my own loyalties, but peace and trade with France can only benefit England, so it is wise to support our good relations."
"They told me you were a man of wisdom and education Lord Bainbridge, I can see they were right." She put her hand on my arm and stood close, and despite all my resolve not to be enchanted, I was, she was formidable, adapting to her audience, me, in a swift train of thought and changing tactics in an instant, I could not but admire the Emissary from France.
In the next weeks we talked much, I reporting back to the King, she writing long sealed letters back to her masters. Our conversation strayed from our duties, often inspired by the good French wine she had brought with her, and sometimes by our strong English beers. We discussed magic and arts and music, and sometimes our pasts. We developed an honest fondness for each other and respect for each other's abilities, but I would not have called what we felt in those early days love.
//\//\//\//\//\//\
The court moved to the house of the Lords of Wessex and we went with it, and Wessex decided to place our sleeping arrangements nearer to each other, because in his words "I can't have you young people clattering about my house at all hours, if you've got to talk to each other, ya might as well be placed not to disturb me whole household," and that was my undoing, for rather than having a long walk to gather my thoughts before encountering Winifred, she became my cherished next door neighbour, and my almost constant companion, and gradually she became my world.
//\//\//\//\//\//\
I had lost my beloved wife Anne in the birth of our first child Stephen, I miss her still. I was blessed that the boy grew up strong and I received good reports from his fostering with the Duke of Northumberland and his own strong sons. I miss him, but know he receives the care that he needs in my cousin's household. So I sometimes charm and take to my bed a willing maid to satisfy those physical needs we all posses, but no one has held my heart for these long 10 years since the passing of my dear wife.
When not at my duties I ride and hunt, and practice to remain proficient with those weapons that befit a knight of this realm, being particularly adept with the sword. I discuss strategies of war with old soldiers, and sometimes invent new ones. My estates are run efficiently by my freeman, and my less wealthy relatives are kept in comfort on my lands. And for pleasure I study my books and practice those arts of magic I have learned from my father and his ancient teacher. I can perform services for my country, and sometimes my King honours me by requesting divination or healing by my arts. This is my life, to serve honourably my country, to be a good friend to those who love me, and to forget the aching loneliness that my beloved Anne left when she died all too young and all too soon.
So, as you can see, I was not an innocent to be charmed by this woman from France, I knew my own heart, and had strength of mind, but day by day, by a look, or word or touch, Winifred stole my willing soul to her heart.
//\//\//\//\//\//\
There is much music and dancing at Court. The Queen likes to be entertained so a troupe of mummers follows the court and often there are masques and balls. One such celebrated the Queen's birthday, so all was splendid and bright, and flowered romance, and while my senses were dulled or inspired by wine, the Emissary from France, after her long courtship, seduced me into her bed with her soft lips and long limbs and languid sighs and pleasures so divine that I knew I would never desire another woman but her. That the cream of her skin, soft as rose petals would be the only touch that my hands and lips would long to feel, and the softness of her auburn hair would be the only silk my skin would desire, that her touch and the beating of her heart next to mine would be my sanctuary and would heal my aching heart. I knew at that first joining, at that divine time in her arms and bed that Winifred was the answer to my alone soul's questing, that I was mated to her very being, hopelessly and without desire for surcease throughout all eternity.
I was not so naive to think that a woman of Winifred's capabilities would feel the same devotion, I assumed I was a plaything to amuse her on her present mission, to be left behind on her return to France, that I would be forgotten along with the vision of England once her ship slipped away from our shores, but she was to prove me wrong.
//\//\//\//\//\//\
I woke that first morning in her bed to the sound of bird song, our limbs still entwined, the warmth of her so delicious against my skin, I could feel her heart, beating gently now, where her chest rested against mine. I knew for propriety's sake I should wake her and bid her farewell and leave, but I longed to dwell in that well of bliss for a few moments longer, so just lay and memorised every sense my body felt in that warm comforting bed, in her warm comforting embrace.
She whispered. "You must tell the king you know."
"I thought you still slept." I kissed the top of her head. "What must I tell the King?" I pulled her closer.
"That you have bedded me, others may accuse you of bias if you are my lover, so the King must know that we are mated and that I may have greater influence over you than is appropriate. It may even be wisest to hand the negotiation to another, so that you cannot be accused."
"So you have not seduced me to gain favour?" I said the words gently with humour so they did not sting.
"I seduced you to gain your favour, to gain the services of your strong body, and passionate lips, and agile mind, and to be blessed by your smile, not for any political gain." I felt her smile against my chest. "I am not a silly thing to think a way to influence a kingdom is through its bedchambers. I took you to my bed because since I first saw you, no before, when my King's advisors told me of you, I have been intrigued and desirous to know you, and since first seeing you I have wanted to have you to my bed." She raised her tousled head (our mating had been very adventurous and prolonged, so she had every right to be dishevelled), and smiled deeply down at me. "And I am very, very glad I have come to England to be educated by you in your English ways… in all things." And she took my lips with hers, sliding her hungry body onto my equally hungry body, and joyously seduced me once again.
//\//\//\//\//\//\
A cold winter set in making communications and travel difficult, so the Court dug in and amused itself. The almost hibernation of the winter Court meant my duties became less demanding, which was just as well because Winifred became more demanding, and some days we stayed abed and pleasured each other until our bodies would no longer answer to our mind's ambitious desires.
To my surprise Winifred was as ravenous for me as I was for her, I had not known such honest passion in a woman before, and fortunately we were well matched, our bodies expressing our desires in an elegant erotic timeless dance of limbs and kisses, and longings fulfilled.
When we were not thus engaged we talked, of many things at first but soon our discussions always graduated into talk of magic, for which we both shared an all encompassing devotion. We found that we both knew many different skills and Winifred encouraged me to write my first grimoire from the arts that she taught me, and she equally recorded those spells and potions that I taught her.
I could not have been happier, in love and loved by a woman who matched me in every way. Such is the way of life that such innocent happiness could not continue.
//\//\//\//\//\//\
One morning I awoke to find that she had secretly bound me to the bed and stripped the bed clothes away leaving me naked to the cold air.
"Winifred love, what do you do here? I'm getting chilled, what adventure do you plan? Whatever, stoke the fire before my poor bones freeze."
She had a sparkle in her eye, I noted that she had on a robe, so was not suffering from cold as I was. "Best if your skin is chill, you'll not be so ticklish when I do this." She had very early discovered how ticklish I was, which often turned some of our erotic experiments into giggling failures because I did not have the willpower to overcome my body's weakness.
"Do what my love? Lets at least discuss it with the fire burning high, I can already feel goose bumps as big as apples and the shivers, let me loose or cover me."
"Nay to either, you look very attractive, lying there naked in all your impotent power, at my gentle mercy."
"I never thought to hear you accuse me of impotence." I quipped.
"Well, my sorcerer, in this case you are." Suddenly she her voice became serious. "In your arts you've strengthened your mind and hold many defensive spells ready in case of attack, but have you defended your body equally? No." She answered herself. "You are as vulnerable as a new born lamb, despite all your physical prowess."
"I don't understand, what do you here wench?" I was becoming concerned.
"I'm going to tattoo defensive spells on your body…"
"No you are not, I have my talisman, I have my jewelled rings, I'll not have my skin marked like some Moorish man."
"You will my love, for I've bound your limbs and your power, and this defence of you I will have, for talismans and rings can be taken from you, but a defence that is part of your very body cannot."
Seeing her resolve would not be swayed I began to fight against my bonds, but she had used magic mixed in with the cords and the more I fought the less strength I had until eventually I could move no more. "Do not mark me thus, only slaves and low born seaman and such rabble have these marks on their skin, as a Lord of England, I cannot be so marked."
"Trust me my love, the loss of your dignity will be much made up for by the greater safety of your body."
"Winifred, no!" But to quiet my protests she put a gag woven with spells in my mouth, so even if I had wanted to use magic to defend myself my voice was bound along with my limbs.
She started on my chest with her sharp pen and cold ink. I craned my neck to see what the pen marked and thought I recognised the black lines as a strong ward against poison. The drawing must have taken but a minute but to my tortured flesh, even with the cold, desperate to move away from the over stimulation tickle of the pen, but unable to move, to me the sensation felt like hours. She then moved to my forearms and on the soft sensitive flesh drew swirls which I soon recognised as defence against blades and then another spell to give me the strength of ten, again the sensations were agony, but her bonds and spells held me still, all I could do was endure it.
Then she moved to my legs and I could not see what she drew, through the agony of sensation I thought vaguely it was something of the shape of a spell for speed she drew on my too sensitive thigh. And then another drawing, perhaps the symbol for endurance. By this point I was weeping, though unmanly, I could not deny the unendurable sensations my beloved was putting me through – for my own good, which was galling. But my culture would not allow for this, and my mind… oh how my mind rebelled at being so vulnerable and having this thing done to me. I wondered if I could ever trust her again, that if in her judgement she could bring me so low for this, then what other good cause would justify her to use me so. I pleaded silently 'Oh, my Winifred, stop, please stop, please let me free of this tortuous good deed of yours. I am marked by you already, my soul is yours, please don't mark my body like a low branded serf, I am a knight, and not to be marked so commonly.' Something in her eyes made me think she had heard my thoughts, sometimes we were so very close that we could hear each other without speaking, but she just shook her head and went to draw on my lower chest.
She scratched a powerful ward against black magic into my skin, skin no longer vulnerable to magic but heart achingly vulnerable to her, "Winifred, don't do this, please!" I begged silently. But she just continued down my stomach and onto my belly, with her sharp pen and cold ink, making me her sketch of power. Defending me and warding me while desecrating me with her pen which had become a wand of dominance and slavery.
Then she rolled me over and began working at my shoulders, I felt her draw runes of power, and the power seeped into me, but still I could not move. She sketched across my shoulders, and down my spine, more power, more abilities that I had not possessed before, but still no freedom from my skin's torture. And then to my flanks, where I had dreaded her touch before, now I screamed out against it on my so nerve charged sensitive flesh. Here at my ribs she sketched invulnerability and a shield against fire, every scratch entering agony into my soul. "Winifred NO!" I wept silently, but I was hers to mark and make and hold, and defend.
Her black ink owned me, disfigured me, made me stronger while making me weaker, making a great sadness because my beloved Winifred was harming me, her love for me was now a danger to me, I would not be the same man I had woken as this morning. I would be the marked man and have to leave court, I prayed she would not mark my face, as while I could conceal my body's deformity perhaps I could hide what she had done to me, and not have to leave, but if she marked my face….
She drew a great swirl at my lower back, seemed to draw on me endlessly some master stroke of the very essence of the force of magic and I felt the power throb into me, throb into my pelvis, entering into my very bones. Then the pen began marking my buttocks, straight lines and angles, some such to do with invisibility, and farseeing – and all of course filled with torment.
With cool hands she gently brushed the hair away from the back of my neck and began putting her marks there, marks to ward off pain and tiredness, she parted my hair to write on the back of my skull such spells that would give me wisdom and patience and persistence and longevity, she took a long time covering every inch of my skull between my hair with her wards. She turned me over again and continued the marks across my throat, guarding me from any and all destruction and weakness. And then, as I most feared, she began to tattoo my face, I begged her to stop with my eyes, with my face marked I could not stay at court, could not hold office, while protecting my life Winifred was also stealing my life. A tattooed man could have no power or standing in England, this woman's desire to keep me safe was destroying me, my anguish became unbearable. She even closed my eyes and wrote runes on my tired eyelids.
Finally the torture stopped. Through my distress I heard her calm sad voice.
"And now I must leave you, the spring tide beckons and my ship is at dock. With these wards and spells I have protected you so no harm will befall you. I have made you the most powerful sorcerer in this land to keep you safe from my enemies. I go to France to fulfil my duty to the King, and then if you'll have me I'll return, for Hrothbert to be on this Earth without you my love, would not be life."
She removed the gag and bent to kiss me, I kept my teeth gritted against her lips, she had betrayed me, I could not for my soul's sake return her affection, she had stolen my ability to speak or move or fight, or to keep her or to send her forth. She had robbed me of all power but given me all power. I could feel the magic thundering under my skin where she had marked me. "How could you do this to me?" Furious I demanded horsely.
"Perhaps one day you will forgive me for this act of love that I have done to you." She said sadly, and stepping back she passed her hands expansively through the air and purple light guttered from her hands and enveloped me. I felt a subtle change in my skin, and the bonds fell away from my wrists. The light grafted itself onto the tattoos all over my body and began to sink into my flesh, burning itself deep into my bones. Finally I was free to scream, which I did long and low, like an animal whose pain is beyond bearing.
When I recovered enough for rational thought I was devastated to find her gone. My strength was returning, I looked down to see the marks on my skin fading with the purple light she had infused them with. I was still unable to move, she had obviously intended that I could not follow until she had left these shores, but those terrible marks of power she had maimed upon my skin had faded, I was no longer the marked man. I could feel huge mountains of magical power coursing through my body, she had gifted me with so much, but stolen the one thing I valued above all else, my trust in my one true love, Winifred.
I wept, not from physical pain this time, but from confusion and loss.