Aaaaaaaangst.
Pairing: RoyEd (implied)
Disclaimer: Don't own!
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PLACID
He simply sits placidly, rubbing his bare feet together every now and then. It doesn't create warmth (the metal of the left foot is always sort of cold, even in the summer. Then again, today is simply pleasantly warm, the scents from the apple tree out front wafting in through the window) but he doesn't mind. I don't think he can feel the cold of the metal anyhow, in this state.
He's been like this for a year now. No longer the intelligent, cunning teen he once was, he's simply a cloudy-eyed, peaceful shell. He doesn't speak, but watches intently, sometimes smiling for Aru or I. I know it hurts his brother, and that simple smile on his face is enough to break my heart.
After that battle... His awareness was stolen, as equivalency. You could say that his presence was used in exchange for Aru's body, which is whole again, not incomplete as it had been. As Aru was once a presence without being, it is ironic that his only brother should be a being without presence.
Here I stand, six feet small, gazing at him in longing of a time that won't ever come back. I've forbidden Aru to even think of doing anything to get it back, because even if Aru succeeded, he would be horrified. I know that he would feel so incredibly guilty, and I don't want to cause either of the brothers that pain. They know the trials, and they don't need a reminder of it.
I pause, looking at Aru for a moment. Aru knows that I don't know what to say, and he smiles sadly, guiding me to a chair. "You're going to put yourself into a daze," the younger brother says gently, stepping off to make himself busy once more. I know that this is Aru's method of letting me know it's alright, to not feel so horrible. But I can't help it, and he knows this as well.
I sigh, placing a hand over his flesh hand, which twitches slightly at the touch, but he doesn't mind, and just gives me one of those questioning looks. He's wondering why I'm so sad, and I can see it in his eyes, even though all of his intelligence has been lost. "I'm alright," I whisper, wishing it were true. I can't seem to find the words nowadays, so I simply sit, holding onto the hand of someone who is here, but is truly lost in the meantime.
"Aru," I call, turning to look toward the kitchen, where I know Aru is making coffee. "I want to ask a favor."
The younger brother comes back out, toting a pot of piping hot coffee and a pair of mugs. "What is it, General?" Aru questions, seating himself and placing the coffee between us, a mug on either side of that.
"I want to stay with him."
Aru simply smiles, that knowing smile of his that drills into you, sees what you are and your intentions, what you've done, who you've been. "Alright," he replies. "He trusts you, so all I can ask is that you keep Brother smiling."
Does Aru know my pain? I think so. And I'm grateful that he does, because we can relate, even though our roles in Edward's life were different. "Thank you," I say finally. "I'll be sure to."
