Reunion
Chapter 1.
Danielle Rousseau walked quickly through the jungle, determined not to lose sight of the group of people in front of her. She walked with purpose, as did they, though it was not a purpose they shared, despite the fact that they were headed to the same place. She knew that the best chance she had was to follow them and wait for them to make their move. Then she would be able to make hers.
As she walked, she reflected on all the other times she had attempted what she was doing now. Always, she was searching for her daughter. It was her sole purpose in life, not that the island presented many other kinds of pastimes. When she was first taken, she would wander around aimlessly, too grief-stricken to fully realise where she was going, if she'd already searched this area, how she would defend herself if they found her first. But at the same time, she'd been foolishly optimistic. She never once considered that in sixteen years time, she would still be searching.
As the months went by, she gradually changed her tactics. She began to take notice of her surroundings, and eventually managed to cover a large part of the island. She would have covered more if it weren't for the dreaded whispers she began to hear. They drove her away. Once, she would have thought that these voices were a sign of her losing her sanity, alone out here. But instead, they seemed to help her hold on to it. They gave her focus, reminded her, if she ever started to forget, what was out there, who she was looking for. In a strange way, amidst all the fear, they gave her hope.
After a few years, she began to set traps. Trying to capture one of them, to get information, force a trade, whatever it took to get Alex back. This was how she became aware that there was a third group of people on the island.
When she captured Sayid, she was so sure he was one of them. The way he spoke of her distress call, how could he know about that if he wasn't one of them? She was shocked when he mentioned it had been sixteen years. She'd lost track long ago. She was determined, then, to make him suffer, to feel something for what he and his people had done to her. But he convinced her that he wasn't one of them. It was the way he spoke of the woman that had died, the one in his photograph, Nadia. She realised that this was a person who knew what it was like to lose someone. A kindred spirit perhaps. He spoke to her calmly, kindly. She'd forgotten what that was like, just as she'd forgotten many other things. But he kept asking about Alex. She avoided those questions. She didn't want to talk about that with him. As she was alone, she hadn't had to talk about it at all. She felt it would be too painful to actually put into words what had happened.
She decided to show him her music box. She wasn't really sure why, but as he had shared something with her, she felt she should return the favor. Then he offered to fix it. So she let him. She had to drug him in order to move him, of course. She still didn't entirely trust him; though she was convinced he wasn't one of them, it didn't mean he wasn't still a threat. As he was working on it, he asked her questions. She answered them, about her research team, and how she had ended up on the island alone. It felt nice to have a conversation with someone. She still refused to talk about Alex.
She couldn't let him go. She wouldn't admit it, but she needed him. But he escaped as soon as she left her shelter. When she saw him in the jungle, she felt so betrayed. She realised he was going back to his people, and there was nothing she could do to stop him. So she started to walk away, resigned to a life alone. That day, she felt like she'd never see Alex again. Then, he called out to her. "You'll find me in the next life, if not in this one." He explained that it was what was written on the back of his photograph. Suddenly, she felt renewed hope. Perhaps the odds of her finding her daughter were slight, but there was still a chance. She had to focus on that.
Not long after that, she saw the same black smoke and heard the same whispers she had heard the day the Others came to take her baby. She knew that they were coming for the new baby on the island. She pitied the child's mother, as she knew better than anyone the pain of losing a child. But, selfishly, she also realised she had a chance now, to make a possible trade with the Others. Maybe if she gave them what they wanted, they would give her back her own child. It seemed so logical to her. So she went to their camp, pretending to warn them. Then, when she had a chance, after she'd led certain members of the group away, she took the baby. It felt so wonderful to hold a child in her arms again. She suddenly noticed just how much she had missed that. Her hatred for the Others intensified. She also hated herself, for doing to someone else what they had done to her. She was no better than the Others in that moment. But she had to do it. Any mother would understand, if they'd been in her position.
She waited with the child. The Others never came. She was so sure that this was what they wanted, how could she have gotten it wrong? Eventually, Sayid showed up. Convinced her to give the baby back to him. He didn't seem to hate her for what she'd done. He seemed to understand. The other one didn't. She left them, again, feeling ashamed.
In the weeks that followed, she couldn't rid herself of that feeling of shame. It followed her everywhere. She couldn't concentrate anything else. She decided to go back to their camp, to find the baby's mother and try to explain it to her. When she got there, the baby was sick. She knew what it was, but when she tried to explain to the girl, she was chased away. She left the camp quickly, but she stayed close by. The next day, as she'd expected, the girl and another woman, the one she'd led to the Black Rock, came to find her.
She thought they'd just want to find out about the sickness, but it seemed they had another plan in mind. The girl, Claire, mentioned a place she remembered. She mentioned seeing a girl there. Danielle immediately thought of Alex, and willingly helped them look. Claire led them to a room, one that felt vaguely familiar to Danielle, though she wasn't sure why. It was empty. They were both disappointed by this, though for different reasons. They left, Danielle wondering when she would just give up on finding Alex.
Just before Danielle, left the other two, Claire brought up the topic of Alex. Like Sayid, she seemed curious about what had happened to her. By now, Danielle was becoming used to talking about her, so she answered her questions more readily than previously. She smiled fondly as she told Claire what she had named her daughter. "Alex… Alexandra". Claire hesitated; she seemed to be considering telling Danielle something. "I remember a girl. With blue eyes." She said, looking for recognition in Danielle's face. Realizing what she was talking about, Danielle felt her eyes mist up. "She, um, she helped me. She saved me. Just like you did." Claire continued, smiling. "She wasn't like the others." Danielle closed her eyes briefly, overwhelmed by this unexpected gift, trying to hold onto the details, creating a picture in her mind. "She was good." Claire finished.
Danielle wanted so much to thank her for giving her this, but she couldn't get the words out. She left, once again reflecting on the hope she had been given by a member of this group.
She came to realise, that day, how many more opportunities she'd had to find her child since their plane had crashed. Because of this, and, perhaps, because of the overwhelming loneliness she'd long ago ceased to notice that suddenly permeated her senses, she began to spend more time around their camp. She could never live with them; though she could scarcely admit it to herself, it frightened her to be surrounded by that many people after so many years alone, but she found excuses to wander ever more frequently around their little settlement, observing, listening, relishing in the clear sound of their voices, so unlike the bodiless whispers of the Others.
It was as she was doing this one day that she overheard plans of an attack against the Others. She was still processing this information when they all stood up, gathering backpacks and various weapons, and began to head out. Realizing that once again she had been presented with an opportunity, she followed them.