A N: I Don't Want Your Blood Money, Rowling! And I'm not planning to take them from you with this! So don't sue me!
A N 2: I'm working on Bipolar Hentai Luck! I swear! I just need more time! Just a little... more time... I swear...
A N 3: Yup, that's one of my Plot Bunnies. Since nobody has yet started it, I've decided to get a shot at it.
A N 4: In Loving Memory of Sir Terry Pratchett (1948-2015), writer, genius and Wizzard. You will be missed.
A N 5: Gods, I just know I'll be Damned For All Time for this...
PROLOGUE
The stage had been set.
Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived, saviour of the Wizarding World, had been recently dumped on the doorstep of his obnoxious, Muggle relatives in Little Whinging, Surrey by the Leader of Light himself, Albus Dumbledore, a casket and a small blanket the only things protecting him from the freezing November air. Said leader had then abandoned the scene along with his second most trusted lieutenant and his pet half-giant, probably in order to attend one of the many parties which had began as soon as the news of the Dark Lord Voldemort's defeat had been delivered to the general population, as it seemed to everyone that the worst had finally passed.
(Well, to everyone except than for the Longbottoms, who were at the time being tortured into insanity in front of their one year old child while everyone was busy partying around.)
From there to ten years, Harry Potter would have been meeked into the perfect sacrifice, so utterly starved of any affection and trust to blindly follow anyone kind enough to save him from his own, personal hell on earth for even just 9 months of the year, even follow the ultimate order of sacrificing himself for the Greater Good of the Wizarding World.
However, unknown to Dumbledore and his machinations, it seemed that Fate had other plans for our young boy.
Two soft cracks resounded in the deserted streets of Little Whinging, followed soon after by two pair of muffled, disembodied steps reaching the door of Nr. 4, Privet Drive.
"Is it him?" a disembodied voice said, rich and booming, a hint of joviality in it. It didn't speak in English, or any other known language whatsoever and yet, if someone, anyone had heard what he had said, they would have understood perfectly what he had said. "It doesn't look much for a Saviour..." was then heard as young Harry Potter's casket was raised from the ground by some invisible hands before coming to hover in mid air.
"It is clearly him..." The second voice whispered, an oily sound which lowered the already cold air's temperature. It did speak the same language as the first voice, although people would have somehow detected some sort of Russian accent in it, "Don't you see his forehead? How many babies do you think have been branded with That rune at such a young age?" The second voice whispered in a strained voice, as if talking procured him physical pain, "Now quick, disillusion him before someone notice the flying casket hovering in front of those people door..."
"Relax, Brother Grigorij, you're far too much paranoid..." The first voice grumbled as Harry's Potter's Casket disappeared from sight, along with everything inside it, "The people of this nation are blind, I bet they wouldn't even notice a yellow robed old man theatrically and pointlessly snuffing out all the light of this street even if they wanted to..." The first voice concluded with a snort.
"Yeah, get poisoned, stabbed and drowned by your friends, then tell me if you do not get paranoid too..." The second voice muttered as the two pair of disembodied footsteps was once again heard, soon after followed by another pair of soft cracks.
Yes, it really seemed that the stage had been set for something big to happen.
A N 6: WARNINGS FOR THE WHOLE STORY:
1- Witch-Hunter!Monster-Slayer!Magical-Vatican-Raised!Hufflepuff!Harry.
2- Harry/Hermione/Luna/Daphne/Tracey Love Pentagon of Doom. Who knows how it will turn out in the end? It will be a Harem? Will he chose only one of them? It will be Lunar Harmony? WHO KNOWS?!
3- Some Major Characters' Deaths.
4- Torture could be at some point shown.
5- Good, old fashioned Violence WILL be shown.
6- Senile-But-Good-If-Manipulative!Dumbledore.
7- Ron and Draco Mild Bashing.
8- Teen!Voldemort/Bellatrix.
9- Wizarding History Adapted and Expanded (Which means that some historical Muggle figures MIGHT have been Wizards...)