Cloud's Smile
Boredom. (Post-Game, Pre-Movie, in limbo between those two timelines)
Disclaimer: Do you have any idea how fun it is to listen to One-Winged Angel as you're walking home? Other than that, Final Fantasy isn't mine.
Kadaj had a realization one day, after a day of stalking his brother in the sake of 'mother', and he was quite interested by it.
Cloud never smiles.
Kadaj has watched his every move, and recorded every single thing about his brother in his head for later processing. Yet, Cloud's lack of happiness is the first thing in his head, due to the fact that Cloud really had no reason to be so depressed and emo.
And blondes aren't supposed to be emo.
And so, Kadaj had vowed on that day that Cloud's smile will be his new mission, before he finds Mother.
Cloud had a realization one day, after practicing swinging his mighty large sword for the day, in case something life-threatening happened.
Someone was stalking him more than usual.
Cloud always knew that there was someone following him, it was kind of obvious. The clues were right there, the almost completely silent footsteps at night, the flashes of light that came up at entirely random times, and the scribbling of a pencil on paper when he took a rest.
These things happened even more.
Cloud was getting bit tired of the flashing that now occurred at 3:46 PM, every afternoon. All of the other times were in their usual compulsive order, and quite annoying if Cloud didn't say so himself.
Yet, for some reason, he felt a bit better knowing that he had a stalker. Like he was loved or something to that note. For some reason, anyone that Cloud even liked had a strange habit of, you know…
Dying.
Aerith died, Zack died, and Sephiroth died (Although, if you ask Cloud, he'll deny having any affection whatsoever for this Silver-haired Sex God). He only liked those people; the others just thought he liked them.
Toleration.
Like.
Two very different things. Although, Cloud admittedly liked Reno and Rude in a strangely different way than all the others who, you know… Died.
Like, he just wanted to talk with them, not writhe together in a bed, body mingling to the point of becoming one.
Cloud doesn't know this yet, but he had a crush on the ones who conveniently died. He just wants to be friends with that crazy red head and his bald partner.
The poor emo blonde lived an incredibly deprived life. No wonder he needs a reason to not kill himself.
To be back on point though, Cloud was getting tired of his elusive stalker (which ironically was the point).
Kadaj's plan was almost working. After many days of pure research, he has noted all of the things that make his brother feel some sense of enjoyment. And so, he decided to put his plan into motion with a simple sheet of paper.
Cloud woke up one morning to find a sheet of paper taped to his forehead. The adhesive was quite strong, and came off as it tore an undignified yelp from the blonde. He felt his forehead to ensure that there was no missing skin; he had geostigma, so he didn't require anything else screwing up his skin.
Noticing that the tape was silver, there forth Duct Tape, proving his stalker had probably been unsuccessful with Scotch Tape or anything less painful.
The paper itself had been strange, seeing as how it was a paragraph that was written in a slightly messy way, like by an excited teenager.
'Okay! Now, I have something for you, so listen up!
There was a pair of scissors, a sheet of paper, and a pencil. They were in this long lunch line, and the scissors go "I wanna be in front!" but the paper went "No way! That wouldn't be fair!" so the scissors asked the pencil if he could get in front of him, but the paper went "This should be where you draw the line!" and the pencil wasn't that bright, so he drew the line on the paper, and the scissors saw his chance and cut through the paper and got in front. The paper shrieked in agony and the security ran to him, asking "What was wrong?" and the paper responded "The scissors cut in the line!"
I hope you liked it brother!'
What in the Lifestream was that?
Cloud looked it over and over, still not getting the joke. Deciding that this required assistance, he wandered out of his room and to Marlene and Denzel's room.
Finding them playing a board game on the floor, he asked for their help and showed Marlene the paper.
She laughed long and hard.
"Cloud! The joke is how the scissors wanted to cut in line, and did it anyway through the paper!" She said, her chuckles dying down. Cloud nodded in understanding, wandering back into his room and taping the joke to his door with Scotch Tape.
He'll get that stalker some day.
Kadaj watched carefully as Cloud read the joke. Hoping to hear his brother's laugh, the silver-haired teenager was crest-fallen as his unknowing victim walked out his room to show the joke to those kids.
Kadaj wasn't done with Cloud, just done with Loz's joking skills.
The next day, Cloud awoke with another sheet of paper taped to his head, just not with Duct Tape this time.
Reading once more, he recognized the handwriting as the same from the day before.
'Hey brother!
Your mother is so fat, her body goes to sleep at different times.
Your mother is so stupid; she spends two hours watching Sixty Minutes.
Your mother is so ugly, when she was born; the doctors threw bricks at the hospital.
I hoped you liked this brother!'
Cloud was quite angry. Did this stalker have no respect for the dead? His mother has been dead for quite a long time, amazingly.
And what is a 'Sixty Minutes'?
Cloud, without a doubt, was incredibly offended.
Kadaj decided that Yazoo's Mother Jokes were out of the plan as well. This time, he will make Cloud smile, even if he has to make up a joke himself.
Cloud was ready this time.
He lied in bed, eyes closed but not asleep so he could catch that pesky stalker. He was so sure that the stalker had his breathing patterns down as well, so he breathed deeply like one who was of sleeping would do.
Kadaj tiptoed into the room silently, slinking close to the grounds as he held the new note. He saw his charge's slumbering body, and noticed that his breathing patterns were .3 seconds off, but he assumed that Cloud went straight to sleep from doing things that excite him but don't make him smile.
He quietly taped the paper's end and prepared to connect the other side to Cloud's handsome unsmiling face.
That was, until a tanned hand grasped his wrists.
"I got you, stalker!" Cloud exclaimed as he sat up in bed, still holding Kadaj's wrist. Kadaj wiggled around, but Cloud gripped it tighter.
"Lemme go, brother!" The silver-haired pseudo-stalker whined. Cloud narrowed his eyes suspiciously.
"Not until you tell me what you're doing here." Cloud stated. Kadaj pouted and shrugged in an exasperated way.
"Fine brother, you got me. I was trying to make you smile." Kadaj admitted. Cloud didn't let him go though.
"Why?"
Cloud really had no clue how unhappy he looked all the time. Like he was incredibly depressed or something to that degree.
"Well, you just never do. And I wanted to see how your face would look if it was considerably brighter." Kadaj said. Cloud let go of his wrists, and to his surprise, Kadaj did not run off screaming "Bloody murder!"
"Would you like to see my paper, brother?" Kadaj asked, shyly. Cloud was quite wary of doing so, because of the 'Mother' thing and the really stupid joke that wasn't funny at all.
Kadaj (being such an astounding stalker) caught on with his train of thought and laughed.
"No brother! The last two jokes were written by our other brothers! This one is by me!" Kadaj explained quickly, holding the College Standard sheet of paper out to Cloud.
Cloud was not following Kadaj's 'Brother Talk', but he took the paper anyway, just not understanding why Kadaj called him 'brother' either (they looked nothing alike, to be truthful).
'Hi brother!
You used to have a crush on Sephiroth, didn't you? You liked him.'
It was such a ridiculous accusation that Cloud couldn't help but smile at.
Why in the world would Cloud like that Sexy Stud-Muffin with the Seven-Foot Sword?
Kadaj was ecstatic. Cloud's smile really did make him look even more handsome. Kadaj was also proud of being the only one to accomplish such a task.
Although, for a fleeting moment, Kadaj was a bit selfish. He wanted that smile for himself only. Yet, that was a bit unreasonable, so he just smiled along with Cloud.
"Are you happy now, brother?" Kadaj asked. Cloud looked at his ex-stalker with a 'confused blonde' look and tried to smile again.
He failed. Kadaj smiled even more.
"Sephiroth lover."
Cloud barked out a laugh, it sounded very raspy after being used since never.
Kadaj grabbed his brother's hand in his joy and twirled around laughing. Cloud, who had no choice but to follow along, started laughing as well, the sound becoming less scratchy as they wore on.
"Brother? Will you laugh for me only? I don't care if you smile, but can you save the laugh for me, Kadaj?" Kadaj asked as they still twirled in a juvenile dance, because Cloud can smile at whoever he wants, no matter how much Kadaj wants it for himself. Cloud was pensive before grabbing Kadaj by his underarms and picking him up with hardly any trouble.
Cloud laughed again, ignoring Kadaj's surprised yelps as he spun the silver-haired teen.
Kadaj grinned in response.
END
Ugh, choke me with a widely dipped spoon. You can kill me; I reserve that right to you.