Lily sat at the Gryffindor table in shock. She couldn't believe it. Ever since she and Severus had met that summer Lily had been dreaming of going to Hogwarts, imagining all the fun they would have, but whenever she imagined going to Hogwarts it was always with Severus right beside her. She looked over at the little 3 legged stool in the centre of the great hall. Severus still sat there staring at the hat, his pale skin nearly marble white in the candlelight.
"No, no, no!" she could see him mouthing and he walked dejectedly towards the Slythrin table at the other side of the hall. He shook hands numbly with his housemates then slumped down on the bench rubbing his face. He looked up then and caught her eye, he looked shocked, and his eyes were even darker than usual. Lily tried not to let him know how upset she was, but honestly, only the thought that she and Severus would be housemates had kept her from turning back at Kings Cross and staying with her parents, now she had no one.
Another first year at her table rested a gentle hand on her shoulder; she flinched instinctively before looking up. A thin, ragged looking boy sat beside her, she hadn't even realised he had sat down. He looked stricken at her reaction and withdrew hurriedly. She immediately felt bad, he looked about as lost and confused as she felt.
"Sorry." She said softly. "I didn't know anyone was there."
"That's okay." The boy mumbled without looking at her. "You just seemed a little upset; I wondered if you were okay?"
It took Lily all the self control she could muster not to burst into tears. She didn't trust herself to speak so she just nodded.
The boy raised an eyebrow but said nothing more, it seemed he understood the nod she game him and had used it himself on many occasions. She still felt bad; he was being so kind to her, even though he hadn't seen her before. She glanced over at the Slythrin table, Severus was sitting with his head down, he looked drawn and sad, her heart twisted, he didn't look up from the table. She turned to boy next to her.
"I'm Lily. Thank you for asking if I was okay."
The boy gave a small smile, and turning to face her said shyly and holding out his hand for her to shake.
"I'm Remus."
Lily smiled and took his hand. It was scared and rough but also gentle and warm. It made her feel better, less lost and more welcome and at ease. She felt a prickle on the back of her neck; she turned to see Severus staring at her sadly. He caught her eye and looked back at the table quickly. Her heart sank, he looked so sad, she willed him to look up again, catch her eye so she could smile and make him feel better, but he didn't.
She kept looking at him throughout the welcoming feast but he never once looked up. By the time the feast was finished her stomach was in knots, her fingernails were bitten much more than any of the food that had touched her plate. When the great hall was dismissed and all the students sent to their respective dormitories Lily dodged around the others to get to Severus, she grabbed his arm and he spun around. His eyes were still dark and sad but he smiled for Lily's sake.
"Good food right?"
This was the final straw, Severus' attempt to remain upbeat and happy crumbled whatever remaining restraint she had over her emotions. She choked back a sob. Severus took her shoulder and steered her into a corner dark with shadow.
"Hey." He said softly. "You'll be fine. You already made a friend, that brown haired boy."
Knowing no one could see she finally let her tears out, she reached for Severus' hand and squeezed it, the way she always had whenever she got overwhelmed by panic about leaving home.
"No it won't be, not without you with me, I don't know anything, or anyone."
Severus squeezed her hand in return.
"House's only separate us for the evenings and classes. We still have breaks, free periods, after dinner, well, till curfew anyway. It doesn't mean we are separate all the time. I promise I will spend all my free time with you. After all, you can do magic better than me, I need your help."
Lily relaxed then and smiled, then laughed, suddenly fully appreciating the fact that they were both there, at Hogwarts.
"Shush!" Severus said, hiding the laugh in his own voice. "Were supposed to be in our dormitories, you don't want to get in trouble the first night do you?"
"I'm sorry." She whispered, "But we're here!" she said hugging her friend tightly.
She felt him laugh as he hugged her in return. The moment lasted several seconds till Lily's stomach rumbled.
"Wow, I'm hungry."
She yawned a few seconds after.
"And tired"
Severus laughed again.
"The Gryffindor common room is on the 7th floor of the grand staircase." He said pointing to a portrait right at the top. "See you tomorrow at breakfast?"
Lily grinned.
"See ya Sev." She said, turning to hug him one last time.
"Bye Lils," he said as he turned and melted into shadow.
Lily set off toward the grand staircase, her feet dragging with exhaustion and head buzzing with happiness. She was on the fifth floor when she heard footsteps running up behind her. When she turned she saw the brown haired boy from before. Remus, she recalled.
"Figured you would need the password." He said as he neared her. "Seeing as you're not with the rest of the students."
Lily looked at him questioningly.
"What password?"
"To get into the common room." The boy said.
Lily looked at him again. He was out of breath from running up the stairs; his hair fell slightly over his eyes. Realising Lily did not understand what he meant he explained.
"Some places here, mainly the kitchen, the headmaster's office and common rooms all have passwords to access the passageway or room behind them; they are usually hidden behind portraits. The fat lady, at the top of the seventh staircase, guards the Gryffindor common room so you need a password to access it."
"Okay." said Lily, her head spinning again.
Remus smiled at her apologetically.
"It's a lot to take in, I know."
They climbed the last two staircases together in silence. When they reached the portrait Remus said slowly and clearly
"Wattlebird"
Silently the portrait swung open revealing the common room, empty now save for the scattered remains of some sweets and cards, which appeared to be smouldering. They crossed the room and found themselves facing two spiral staircases,
"Girls dormitory's are to the left." Remus said, turning to head up the staircase on the right.
Lily grabbed his arm.
"Thank you, Remus, for being so kind."
He blushed slightly and gently extricated his arm from Lily's grip.
"You're welcome. Sleep well."
Lily turned and headed up the staircase, steps heavy now and eyes aching. She now had two friends, and she and Severus were finally here. She opened the door to the dormitory, hardly taking any notice of the documents and fell onto the empty 4 poster bed falling asleep almost immediately.
She and Severus were at Hogwarts. All was well.