I just thought this up while I was on the phone so don't be nasty about it!!

Multi-chapter, very-anti Sanji.

Sanji pulled at his favorite pair of pants. It didn't fit right. Who the hell did the wash!!

Oh right, Luffy.

"Luffy! Get over here! I need to talk to you about the laundry!" Sanji shouted. He held Nami's drink in one hand, it was all set for her.

"Gomu Gomu no...!"

"Luffy no! Nami's drink!"

"Rocket!"

There was a loud crash as Luffy slammed into Sanji. Sanji scowled as Nami's drink flew out of his hand. "Luffy!!!"

The straw hat boy blinked innocently. "Oh, sorry Sanji..." he apologized.

Sanji sighed. "You're hopeless. Now Nami- swan's drink is spilled." he said, bending to clean it up.

Luffy started to giggle as the crew heard a loud rip. Zoro woke up , looking at Luffy point to Sanji.

"Oh god! I can see Sanji's ass!" Zoro yelled, covering his eyes.

Usopp shuddered. "Gross, it's a pink thong!!" he shrieked.

Sanji blushed deeply. "I-it was white. But it got mixed in with Luffy's vests." he explained.

Luffy gave a loud yelp. "Agh! It's like he's directly on me! Burn it!" Luffy exclaimed, throwing his vest to the ground.

Zoro stood up. "Oi, oi. No one's burning anything." he growled, trying to maintain order among the frightened crew members.

Sanji back up against a wall, trying to make his way into the kitchen.

Thank god Zoro had all of them distracted long enough.

That evening...

The crew sat silently around the table as Sanji was finishing up dinner. He just had some last minute touches, and invited the crew to start eating.

Zoro was late... as usual. But Sanji had a feeling he was late for a reason. The reason being all of the crew would be there.

"What's for dinner cupcake?" he joked, sitting beside Luffy. Usopp started to shake with silent giggles.

"Oi marimo! Don't call me that.. It's weird." the cook growled.

Zoro snickered. "I'm sorry your royal higney."

Luffy covered his mouth, trying not to spit any food out while he was laughing. And it wasn't just him, the whole crew was doing the same.

"Don't call me that."

"Sorry princeASS"

"Marimo stop right now"

"Your majASSty"

"Shut up!!"

There was a loud clang as Sanji attempted to hit Zoro's face with a frying pan.

He almost did, until Zoro ducked and he ended up hitting his precious Nami- swan.

"Ow! Sanji!"

Sanji ducked, trying to avoid Nami's fists of fury. "My Nami- sawn! I am sorry! I meant to hit marimo!"

Nami pulled Sanji up off the floor by his hair.

"Don't you ever hit me!! Got it!" she demanded.

Sanji gave a low whimper. "Yes m-my swan"

Chopper put down his food. "Someone is going to choke on this, I know it." he mumbled.

Just then there was a gagging sound coming from Luffy's side of the table.

"Luffy!"

The boy had managed to stuff the whole ham into his stretchable mouth.

"Sorry" he mumbled, swallowing it whole.

Sanji sat at the table, still very embarrassed about that afternoon.

"Look, let's just forget it happened. And since Luffy ate all the food while you were joking around, let's go out for dinner." Sanji suggested.

Nami smiled. "Yeah- you could use a good dessert right now." she comforted.

Franky laughed. "Hehe, what are you going to have for dessert Princess- cakes, princess cakes?"

Zoro turned around in disgust.

"You killed it. It's not funny. Just..shut up."

Yes! I finished this first chapter.. I thought I'd never get through it!