Well, for the first time in over three years, I have found a random character in my Emo Corner! A friend of mine started reading my fanfics and just insisted that I continue the series XD So yeah. I've pretty much exhausted GX, so my newest Emo Corner stars a certain crazy forest boy :P Say hi, Jet.
Jet: …crazy forest boy?
Alu: Yup.
Summary: The Emo Corner is back in business! And the Avatar cast has begun to trickle in, kicking off with everyone's favorite slightly-sociopathic freedom fighter!
Warning: Crack XD And I'm going to try to keep dear Jet in character, but I'm a little rusty, so who knows how well that's going to work :P
Disclaimer: Alu does not own ATLA or any characters therein, much though she would love to own Jet and Zuko…for obvious reasons…
Emo Corner: Jet!
As I sat at my desk, wondering when my "corner" had morphed into a good-sized office – complete with therapy couch and bookshelf full of intellectual nonsense – I heard a commotion just outside the door.
"This is mutiny, dammit! Let go of me!"
The door burst open to reveal my latest appointment.
"I do not need therapy!" Jet bitched loudly. Clearly, the two people holding his arms behind his back disagreed. The girl snorted.
"Sure, Jet. You're perfectly stable. I'm sure someone will vouch for you," Smellerbee snarked, shaking her head. On Jet's other side, Longshot rolled his eyes.
Jet scowled at them.
"Hey, Lu," Smellerbee sighed. "You have no idea how long it took to get him here. I finally had Longshot pin him to a tree while he wasn't paying attention."
"When I get out of here, I swear I am going to murder both of you," Jet muttered.
"Thanks, Bee. I'll call you when I'm done with him," I said, barely holding back snickers. Smellerbee nodded, and Longshot, of course, said nothing.
Jet glared at me as his friends left and I locked the door behind them.
"If I find Zuko, can you torture him instead of me?" asked the trapped freedom fighter.
"Nope, he's next anyway. Nice try."
Jet sighed resignedly and flopped on my couch, hands behind his head, looking incredibly sexy – wait, scratch that, BORED is what I meant, yeahhhhh – and clearly just waiting until he would be allowed out of the room.
"Sooooo. What seems to be the problem?" I asked, putting on my best therapist voice.
The guy on my couch stared at me as though not quite sure what was going on.
"Is that…is that Sokka's fake beard?"
I quickly yanked off the fake facial hair and hid it behind my desk, whistling completely innocently thank you very much.
"Nope. Now tell me, Jet, what brings you to my corner?"
"My traitorous friends."
"You are no help at all," I sighed.
A muffled string of Angrish issued from the boy now banging his head on my couch.
"FINE. I'm here because Longshot and Smellerbee saw me having a bit of a bad day and instantly assumed that it meant that I had completely lost my mind and needed to see a shrink. Why they brought me to you is an entirely different question that I don't know how to answer."
As I had learned a long time ago, "a bit of a bad day", in Jet-speak, meant "moderate to severe mental breakdown".
"I seeeeeeee. So what prompted this 'bad day'?"
"Oh, you should know, you insane bitch."
I racked my brain, trying to figure out just to what my patient was referring that I would know about. Well, that I could be accused of, anyway.
"So this wasn't about the whole 'dying' thing?"
"Nah, I walked that off. I'm good."
I stared, puzzled.
"You walked off death?" Jet nodded with a deep, heavy sigh. I shook my head and got back to the subject at hand. "So, if it's not the fact that you were dead, what has traumatized you, exactly?"
Jet's signature stalk of grass bobbed up and down as he ground his teeth. It took a moment before he answered.
"Same thing that brings just about everyone to your damn corner. And you've been reading it all day."
Ohhh. That was what me meant by "you insane bitch".
"Oh come on, Jet, it's practically canon. You stalked the guy for weeks."
For a moment, the freedom fighter was wordless.
"I did not!" I sent a look his way that could not be denied. "Okay, I did. But…do you have to write it? Spirits, woman, I've seen enough…I did not fuck that guy on the boat. I didn't. Seriously. And that's what half of the fics concerning me are about. I also did not sex up Katara. Or Sokka. Or Sokka and Zuko at the same time. Or Katara and Zuko at the same time. Or Mai and Zuko at the same time." Jet facepalmed and banged his head on the couch some more.
I shrugged and raised an eyebrow, slightly affronted. I hadn't written any Jetko. Yet. And Jetara was entirely not my fault - I didn't even read it! - nor was the rest of the pairing nonsense that I would never admit to finding extremely hot when written correctly.
"Oh, the hazards of being sexy and stalking another sexy man," I mused, sticking out my tongue at him. Jet glared at me.
"You are no help whatsoever."
I really didn't know why Smellerbee and Longshot had brought him to a "shrink" who shipped Jetko.
End
XD Gotta love the guy. Also, how did you like my first crackfic in forever? :P I know I'm a little rusty, but I hope I performed reasonably well. Review please!
Just realized that this is the 10th Emo Corner, and Jet's first episode is the 10th episode of ATLA. This was not planned in the slightest XD
