The Precious You

Genre: Romance – Angst – Hurt – Comfort – Drama – Selfharm

Rating: R15

Pairing: (mainly) Yamatonokami Yasusada x Kashuu Kiyomitsu

Side pairing: Izumi no Kami Kanesada x Horikawa Kunihiro

Summary: Being haunted by the past memories of his late master, Okita Souji, Kashuu was desperately trying to forget the fact that he was a rusty sword. His twin, Yasusada, who bore a striking resemblance to Okita made him feel repulsed because he was constantly reminded of his own weakness and background. Unbeknownst to Yasusada, some bruises and wound had started appearing little by little on Kashuu's beautiful body.

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction made for personal satisfaction. Touken Ranbu belongs to DMM and Nitroplus. No connection is implied or should be in inferred.

A/N: Okay first of all, I would like to send my thanks to my aarin pet, preciiousmochi who helped me to beta-read my writing. I'm sorry that even though you are busy, you still want to help me out. This is made for my favorite pairing – Yamato no Kami Yasusada x Kashuu Kiyomitsu. I know, I know, they are just too adorable. There will be slight Kanesada x Horikawa inside.

Anyway, I wanted to tell you that I'm in love with Odachi Yasusada and I love his long hair when he is an Odachi. So in the first part of this story, his hair is that long; in his uchigatana form, okay? Okita in this story, I personally like Okita Souji from Peace Maker, but its up to you to imagine your own Okita image xD

I have several arts for this novel, so if you wanna check then you can go to my profile or check AO3 or went straight to my DA (asakurahannahda), the links are in my profile page.

All feedback and constructive criticisms are welcomed to improve my writing.

Cheers!

Chapter 1: Him

"I am Yamatonokami Yasusada – one of Okita Souji's favorite swords. I'd say that even though I'm difficult to handle, I'm quite capable. It's been a while, Kiyomitsu." Yasusada smiled, extending his hand towards Kashuu.

Kashuu didn't say anything; he stayed rooted to the spot. The guy had his long hair tied up neatly into a ponytail. The end of his hair almost reached down his waist. A boyish smile was plastered on his face as he waited for Kashuu, his other half, to accept his handshake.

"Kiyomitsu, Here is your other half. I know you two are Okita's swords. I hope you guys get along well, just like in the past." The Master patted Kashuu's back before he left them alone to talk.

'Get along well… as if! That long hair… He… he is still imitating Okita…' Kashuu gritted his teeth and looked away from the questioning look on Yasusada's face. "Nice to meet you again…"

Yasusada grinned widely.

"Hi again, Kiyomitsu…" before Kashuu could avoid it, he was pulled into Yasusada's tight embrace. Kashuu sucked in his breath for a moment. He grimaced at the scent of the guy that invaded his nostrils – the scent of a rusty sword that just gained a soul. He didn't push him away, nor return Yasusada's hug.

Kashuu stared at his surroundings. He never thought that he'd be back in this era. His eyes gleamed at the sight of several glistening swords under the moonlight. Was he somewhat alive again? His eyes found a person who looked similar to Yasusada, only that his hair was shorter. Just like back in the time when Okita Souji, his previous master, had teamed up along with him.

"Yasu... sada?" he whispered to himself, not believing what he was seeing. The figure was fighting against an army of men. His eyes caught another familiar figure and widened in recognition. It was Okita Souji who was swinging his sword with great effort. He could see that his late master was gasping for breath while dodging an attack. Yasusada was defending him from the mob.

Kashuu averted his eyes when Okita clashed one of his beloved swords with the big man. The sword cracked and broke cleanly into two. There he saw himself lying on the floor, broken and shattered. Kashuu could see Yasusada's cheeks were stained wet by his own tears. He could see the rage of emotions on his face every time he swung his sword at the enemy. Suddenly he realized where he currently was.

Ikedaya Inn.

Kashuu raised his trembling hands, trying to call out to the two of them. But he couldn't hear his own voice.

"Aruji! Yasusada! Stop it... or both of you will..." But Kashuu's voice couldn't reach them. He raised his own sword and charged into the battlefield to help his team. But every time he attacked his opponent, his sword went through the enemy. No matter how hard he tried to swing his sword, his attacks wouldn't connect. It was as if he was invisible. Desperate tears streamed down his cheeks. Yasusada who had been beside him was attacked on his stomach. Kashuu's eyes widened in alarm.

"Yasusadaaaa!"

"Kiyo!" Yasusada slapped Kashuu awake. He was staring at him in worry as Kashuu's tears ran down his cheek. He was grunting and moaning while trying to get away from his grasp. Yasusada slapped him harder, making him gasp in surprise. He snapped his eyes open, blinking at Yasusada who had pinned him down on his futon.

"Yasu... sada...?" he blinked at the darkness, his eyes still trying to adjust with the very limited amount of illumination inside the room. He slowly brought his hand to rub his throbbing red cheek. His mind drifted back to the event of his dream before he promptly tried to sit up. "Aruji... we need to save-"

"It's a dream!" Yasusada shook him awake exasperatedly. Kashuu frowned for a moment before it dawned on him that the vision he saw was just a dream.

"Are you awake now?" Yasusada whispered to him.

Kashuu silently nodded in reply.

Yasusada pulled him into a hug. The guy below him grunted at his weight on him.

"Yasusada, you are heavy..."

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry that you have to see that again. I'm sorry that you have to dream something about him again. I'm sorry... I couldn't protect you..."

Kashuu stared at the ceiling, sighing softly. He felt empty. On top of him, Yasusada was trembling. He could feel his fear of losing his other half. Kashuu brought his hand up to pat on his back, stroking his hair affectionately.

"It was a dream, you said so yourself too…" Kashuu murmured. His twin relaxed as he continued to pat on his back reassuringly.

It didn't take a few minutes for Yasusada to be lulled to sleep from the comfort he was receiving. Kashuu pushed him off carefully, trying not to wake him up. His expression contorted in disgust at Yasusada's sleeping face. He was too similar to his late master. He gripped the blanket and pulled it up to his head, hiding himself from any prying eyes while he silently cried underneath it.

Yasusada cracked his eyes open; not doing anything other than listening to the muffled sobbing sound his twin was making beside him. He ignored the urge to pull Kiyomitsu into his embrace.

Morning came. Yasusada was awakened by the sound of the door closing. He looked to his side from the futon, staring at Kashuu who was fresh from bath. He was sitting in front of the mirror, reaching out for the concealer to start his usual morning ritual. His twin watched him from his futon, rolling to his side and rubbed his sleepy eyes.

"Are you awake?" Kashuu asked, looking closely at the red spot on his cheek. Yasusada noticed the small cut and quickly sat up. He approached Kashuu to pull his hand away from his face before yanking his face upwards for closer examination.

"Wha-" Kashuu hissed in surprise at his twin who was currently examining his cheek intensely.

"What's with the cut?" he demanded.

"It's just a simple cut. What's wrong with it?!"

"You, the one who spend so much effort taking care of your beauty, let your face wounded? Like hell I'm going to believe that."

Kashuu made a face and batted his hand away from his chin. "Quit it, it's nothing big. I can use the concealer to hide it!"

"That's not the point!"

"It's none of your damn business!" Kashuu spat at his twin.

A knock from outside the room interrupted their heated exchange.

"Y-Yes?" Kashuu called out.

"Umm… I just wanted to tell you that breakfast will be ready soon. Did something happen? I heard you guys arguing." Horikawa's voice could be heard from the other side of the door.

"Everything is alright. We'll come out as soon as we are ready. Thank you." Yasusada replied.

"Okay then." As soon as Horikawa's steps faded away from the door, they both sighed. Their eyes met and Kashuu grumbled. He looked back to the mirror and started applying the concealer on his face.

"I was just worried, you don't need to be so worked up over it…" Yasusada shook his head. He walked to the closet and took out his usual daily clothes.

Kashuu watched him leave the room. He looked at his reflection in the mirror again and frowned. He raised his eyebrow. The concealer was too thin to cover his wound. He needed more.

The sun was shining brightly by the time the Master assigned them to their chores. One team was sent to an expedition in the middle of the hot summer. The other was ordered to tidy up the house and prepare for lunch while waiting for the expedition team to come back.

Kashuu stared off into space while leaning against the wall. Kanesada, who was in the middle of brushing the horses noticed it and elbowed Horikawa. Horikawa looked at back at the man who distracted him from his work of sweeping the ground questioningly.

"What's wrong with him? He has been spacing out a lot lately." Kanesada muttered.

"I wonder if it has something to do with the current investigation on Ikedaya. But... Aruji will be mad if he continues behaving like that." Horikawa said before stepping forward to stop whatever that was going through Kashuu's mind.

"Kashuu-san, uhh… if you don't start working, Aruji will be mad." The guy quickly resumed his work after apologizing. Horikawa smiled and continued sweeping the ground.

"What if…" Kashuu suddenly spoke up in the middle of his duty. Horikawa raised his head, listening. Kanesada who was bathing the horse perked up his ears, trying to get something out. His movement slowed down, causing Yasusada to reprimand him.

"Shush, don't you want to get something out of that guy?" Yasusada shook his head.

"He won't talk to me… I don't even know why…"

"That's why Horikawa is asking him. Maybe he can get something out of him since Kashuu doesn't seem to want to open up to you," the taller of the two grinned widely.

"Nothing happened actually… I'm just curious about Aruji…" Kashuu sighed as he leaned on his broom.

Kanesada and Yasusada blinked at each other and peeked from the other side of the fence.

"What about Aruji?" Horikawa asked, nonchalantly piling the leaf to the side of the trash can with his broom. Kashuu stared at him for a moment.

"What is he planning? I mean… Why did he give us soul? I knew he got power within him, but what are his reasons, I wonder…"

Horikawa was silent for a moment, thinking. He looked down to the leaf beneath the broom and shook his head.

"He got his reasons, you know. He needs us to help him with the time travelers who are trying to change history of the world. Aside from that, don't you find it useful to be a human for once? We are just… sword after all….. I think it's a blessing for us." Horikawa smiled. Kashuu sighed at his answer.

"Because of him I recalled something I shouldn't have and feel… broken and thrown away just like that…" he stared at his hand which was swollen.

Yasusada noticed the wound and ran up to him.

"Oi! Baka!" Kanesada exclaimed.

"Kiyomitsu, what's with the wound?"

Kashuu quickly retracted his hand, hissing at Yasusada like a snake. The guy was good enough to sneak up on him like a stalker.

"It's nothing and it's not your problem! Quit it, you are being annoying lately!" Kashuu threw his broom to the ground angrily.

"I'm not going to stand back watching you unrepaired! That wound wasn't even there this morning!" Yasusada forcefully pried Kashuu's hand open, trying to assess the wound.

"Umm… you two… I don't think being rowdy is a wise thing to do right now…" Horikawa tried to calm them.

"But he is obviously hiding something!" Yasusada accused while pulling Kashuu, who was trying to free his hand from Yasusada's grasp.

"This is not your problem! What is wrong with you?!" Before Yasusada could retort, a hand grabbed the back of their heads and slammed their foreheads together. Kanesada managed to break the tension just like that. The way his late master stopped some arguments was still fresh in his mind. Being able to practically do it made his heart feel so satisfied.

"Calm down, both of you! Cool you head before you speak!" he glared down at the two of them who were now clutching on their foreheads and wincing in pain.

"Yasusada, I don't think forcing him to talk is a good way of doing things," Kanesada glanced at Yasusada who was grumbling.

"What is happening in here?" the demanding voice of their master could be heard from behind. The toudans gulped at the sight of their master who was standing not too far from them.

"If you don't do the chores properly, you won't make it by lunch time. You know how the battle for food is." Their Aruji chuckled and left them with a wave. The four of them could only sigh in relief at the retreating figure of their master.

"Now, let's finish our job before lunch time, or else we're going to be late." Horikawa announced with renewed vigor and picked up Kashuu's broom from the ground.

"Right…" Kashuu muttered.

The four of them quickly went back their job and not even a word was uttered.

Kashuu stared at his hand; of course the wound wouldn't just disappear so easily. He grabbed some cotton and a bottle of rubbing alcohol to disinfect his wound. He didn't want the master to know about this in fear of losing his love. After all, master was the person who had given him life; the person who had made him breathe the fresh air. He was different from his late master. Kashuu smiled a little at the image of him worrying over small things like a minor wound when they were actually sent out to the battlefields. To where they would sometimes end up being wounded or even broken if the enemies were too strong.

Kashuu's fingers curled into a fist, clenching tightly. He bit his lips and started sobbing silently. He was just inflicting another wound on himself. His nails were stained red by the blood on the palm of his hand. Kashuu shut his eyes tightly as the blood started dripping down.

"Why… why do you care so much?" Kashuu whispered weakly. He felt numb by the new wound he just created.

Unbeknownst to him, a pair of eyes was staring at him disbelievingly from the entrance door, which was slightly ajar.

"What?! Kiyomitsu is hurting himself?!" Kanesada exclaimed.

"I was on my way here when I heard someone crying. Then I realized that I was passing by Kashuu's room. He was crying alone while hurting himself." Kunihiro explained while setting a tray of tea on the table.

"I see… If that's the reason, then Yasusada's concern for him this afternoon was reasonable. They are like twins, so I'm not surprised if Yasusada already had a hunch about it."

"You mean Yasusada didn't know about it yet? Don't you think we should say something to him?" Kunihiro's tone was full of concern. He took a seat behind Kanesada before pulling Kanesada's ribbon off his hair and started combing his long, thick hair.

Kanesada sighed and leaned back against him. "I don't think we should do it. I mean, you saw him crying alone, right? That means he probably didn't want anyone to know about it. I'm pretty sure he didn't even tell Yasusada."

"But what if he break down? Or what if Aruji finds out that he's been purposely hurting himself?"

"If that's the case then Aruji will take the matter into his own hands. Don't you believe in him?"

Kunihiro stopped his combing. "I believe in him," he answered with a serious look in his eyes. Kanesada turned around. He ruffled Kunihiro's hair with a smile and chuckled at the guy's immediate protests.

"It will be alright," he assured and leaned down to peck him on his cheek. Such simple gesture was enough to adorn Kunihiro's cheek with a pink hue. Kanesada poked his flaming cheek affectionately.

"Yeah…" Kunihiro smiled back at him before Kanesada leaned down again to claim his lips.

Kashuu stared at the blood on his hand blankly. A deep voice echoed in his mind.

'Destroy… destroy more… Even if your sword breaks, you mustn't stop.'

TBC