Authors Note: As always, I own nothing. If you like it (or don't like it) let me know, leave some feedback :) To all you House/Cameron shippers: Don't be put off by this first chapter.
Doctor Lisa Cuddy, bombshell Dean of Medicine at Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital was having a considerably bad day. Her hands were full – rather overflowing – with all sorts of hospital intricacies. Such pesky things included wiping the asses of wealthy patrons to secure funding for the hospital, placating the outraged families of patients when the entire process of diagnosis, treatment, and recovery doesn't happen overnight. Never forget the ever-growing list of guest speakers anxious to bring their over-zealous selves into hospital to sell themselves to the promising med students. Oh and then there's the relentless battle with the hospital lawyer who has been insisting that malpractice insurance rates for all doctors needed to be increased…dramatically. But Cuddy knew that given the choice, most of the highly qualified doctors on her payroll would laugh in her face and walk on down to Princeton General, leaving her with little choice but to hire incompetent med students. And that is just a disaster waiting to happen.
So in addition to the shit-storm spiraling out of control in her office, Dr. Cuddy had another problem she needed to address. That problem being none other than the childish antics of the brilliant Dr. House. That infuriating, stubborn, callous, seductive pain in the ass had plucked her last nerve. His complete disregard for patient wishes, coupled with his inability to restrain his snarky comments and absolute lack of human emotion had gotten him into trouble again. Once, just once, Dr. Cuddy wished he would, if only for a second, think of someone but himself. Regardless of what others might assume about their relationship, she adored House – every part of him. But more than that, she respected him, valued his opinions, trusted him entirely…followed him blindly. Even though he was probably the biggest liability of the hospital, Cuddy didn't care. She was determined to keep him around for as long as possible and sometimes that meant she had to do her fair share of bargaining, placating, and perjuring on his behalf.
She knew, from the moment he was hired, he had no interest in the inner workings of her particular job at the hospital. And yet she figured that somewhere inside of his delightful attractive body he held some sort of respect for her. She hoped he had at least enough respect to not make her job feel like the epitome of hell. The funny thing about hope…it always ends in disappointment. House has proved that yet again.
When she heard the news of his latest fiasco, she knew that in all reality, she should have been pissed. More than that…she should've flown into his office like a bat out of hell slinging a sack full of punishments his way. Admittedly, and slightly ashamed of admitting it, she laughed. But even though his antics were incredibly amusing, her position as Dean of Medicine required her to take action against House to protect the hospital. She could think of no better punishment than the thing he hated most…clinic duty. A whole month of morning shift clinic duty. On her way to meet with the Director of Pediatrics, Dr. Cuddy detoured to House's office and with a firm hand (and ass as he not so subtly pointed out) delivered the news of his punishment.
Just as she predicted, House tried everything to have his sentence reduced; tactics ranging from biting sexual innuendos, to insults, then practically to begging. But she kept her resolve. Somehow managing to not falter under those mystifying oceanic eyes as she normally does. Every morning for the next 30 days, House was to report to her first thing at 8:00am on the dot for a four hour clinic shift.
"And don't even think of conning your fellows into doing this for you. You'll never get it passed me. I'm gonna be on you like a fly on shit," Cuddy warned.
"I was hoping it'd be more like a hooker on ecstasy."
"Cute, House. Oh, and don't be late either or I will personally see to it that you are treating every STD-riddled elderly man or woman and every snotting kid that walks into that clinic."