Disclaimer: All rights of Numb3rs belong to CBS.

Author's Note: General spoilers for the episode Trust Metrics. This thought came when I was outlining my next story. Hope you enjoy it.

Special thanks to Newgal for testing this for me.

For the first time that he could recall he didn't know where he was in life. There was nothing that told him just where he was supposed to be or the place where he belonged. Before the places had been all too simple. A common sense that needed no questioning. But that had been before. Before all of that had happened; that being spies, best friends, betrayals from both sides, and the life contracting idea of debt.

Now he was alone. A drifter cast out in the world, thanked by his country for his duty, but left alone to pick up the shattered pieces with no assistance of any kind from the people he had almost given his life for. Some big thanks that had been.

Memories haunted him as he stood, feet spread apart, in the dewy grass of the morning. By noon the wetness would be gone, evaporated away by the sun's rays. Minutes had gone by as he had stood here. Those minutes had turned into hours and he had not moved at all, absorbed in his own thoughts as he stared down at the stone, eyes blinking every so often the only indication of life.

Even in death, he couldn't escape the fact that he still owed Dwayne his life. The bastard just had to of gone and saved him back out there on that boat. Ever the hero, Dwayne had shot the man aiming to kill him, trading his life for his traitorous friend.

That was the second time Dwayne had saved his life. They had met in the army, both needing something in that desolate bleak Afghanistan desert. Dwayne had wanted a friend, and Colby had been looking to replace a hole that had formed years ago with the death of his father. Bonding, the two of them had become closer than brothers, each watching the other's back and just being there when no one else had been.

And Dwayne had watched his back. When an explosive had caught their transport, he had been the one trapped and Dwayne had been the one who had played the hero, crawling back through the burning wreckage to pull him out, saving him from the fate of only dog tags to send back home. His army brother had paid a price then too, suffering from burns and other injuries. Two weeks later he had walked back into their unit.

Only this time Dwayne hadn't gotten back up and walked away to rejoin them. Dwayne had gone down and down he remained, beneath the grass under his feet.

The first debt had been repaid, but after this second time, he was back where he had been years ago after that accident. And now he wouldn't get the chance to make it up.

The shiny black name engraved over the gray flecked stone had enthralled him since he had first stepped onto the hollowed ground. A spasm of guilt rocked through him. He had never wanted to betray his friend and turn against him. That had never been his intention and that certainly hadn't been how it had started out.

However, just as soon as the spasm came it went. He was not guilty of what Dwayne had done. Dwayne had chosen to betray his country. He was the one who had betrayed their friendship and brotherhood. He had nothing to feel guilty for.

Except, he could feel guilty because he now had no way to repay the debt that lay between them. That debt stretched from the world of the living to whatever lay in the realm of the beyond, and he couldn't follow him.

The chirping of baby birds gained his attention and he moved his eyes from the three black words to the tree branch above to the left. Two fledglings cried out, their featherless bodies moving and jostling one another, their tiny beaks opened wide. The mother, a fat little blue colored bird, settled on the edge of the nest. He watched silently as she fed her two babies.

Sudden insight came to him, the blue colored birds answering his question. Regardless of the space that separated him from Dwayne, he now knew how he could repay that debt. He could live.

He could live just as those baby birds were. His brother had given his life so that he might live, and that he knew was how Dwayne would want him to repay it.

He may not know where he belonged at this very moment, but he could work to get back to where he had been. It would take time, and damages had been done. Lies had bent the ties between his friends, especially between his partner, the only other closest person who he could also call a brother. He just hoped that the bridges hadn't been burned completely.

Colby gave one last look at the tombstone with its cold surface and even colder words. He had come here to seek answers, and he had found them.

"Good bye, Dwayne," he murmured softly to no one. Maybe, wherever he was, Dwayne had heard him. He liked to think that he had.

Moving for the first time, Colby turned around and put one foot in front of the other in the dewy grass. Slowly he retraced his footsteps out of the cemetery to his car.

Things would be hard back at the office, and the fact that he didn't know if he would be staying in Los Angeles worried him; he didn't necessarily want to be reassigned. However, the prospect of rejoining his old team seemed far away.

But for now he would live. The lies and such could be explained and would be forgiven with time.

For now he would live, just as Dwayne had died for. And just as his brother would have wanted him to.

First time really delving into Colby's mind. But I'm satisfied with this. No one has thought about Dwayne Carter after the season premiere. We've had plenty of ones with David and Colby, mending that brotherhood. But, what about Dwayne and Colby? Colby would need some form of closure between the two of them.

Now, it's late, and I'm off to sleep. And work on my next chapter.

Thoughts are nice. They go in the box down there.