A/N: This is basically a humorous one-shot fic designed to Promote my Pokemon Story, Mystery Science Theatre 3002. MST3002 isn't complete yet, but this story outlines what my plans are if I ever get around to writing an MST3003.
It's a news segment which basically treats MST3002 as a show, me as a producer and FanFiction as a channel called FFN.
You don't need to read MST3002 to read this. In fact, I intend to achieve the opposite effect. If you liked this or thought it was funny, please read MST3002.
So, enjoy!
"Here it is!" Anicrazy, who had, until now, been lounging nonchalantly on the couch, suddenly sat up straight. He turned up the volume of the T.V, looking around excitedly at the stars of his newest sitcom. Pikachu, Meowth, Squirtle, Charizard, Sceptile and Bulbasaur were seated at various spots in his pad. "It's Blah News' segment on the show!"
"The show is raking in the big bucks and we get hundreds of fan letters per second," said Charizard. "Do we really need a confirmation of our success?"
"Shut up, I'm trying to listen," said Sceptile.
"…both Joseph Stalin and Julius Caesar have denied this rumour," said the pretty, young, female news anchor.
"Now, turning our attention to entertainment, FFN's been taken by storm by its latest sitcom, the hugely successful 'Mystery Science Theatre 3002' produced and directed by Anicrazy, a former struggling 'Animorphs' screenwriter who received his big break when the MST franchise hired him to expand their range into the Pokemon section. The show, starring Pokemon favourites, has received positive responses from viewers.
"Dear me, if I hadn't seen this, I'd have never known," said Charizard sarcastically.
"Keep mum and I'll give you a pay hike," Anicrazy snapped.
"Dear me, if I hadn't seen this, I'd have never known," said everyone.
Anicrazy groaned. "I need more sponsors…"
"It seems as though Anicrazy likes to work fast. Even though MST3002 has barely screened its ninth episode out of an estimated total of fifty, Anicrazy has already finished shooting all the episodes of season one and busily making pre-production preparations for season two, Mystery Science Theatre 3003. Blah Insider has got confidential information regarding the new season that we would like to share with you viewers!"
Everyone stopped smiling. Anicrazy gaped at the screen. "No way," he said, leaning in closer and turning up the volume.
"Firstly, the characters of the new show. Sources have revealed that Pikachu and Meowth will feature in the new season, as will Charizard, as these three command the largest fan following. Squirtle was initially not set for a reappearance, but due to the overwhelming response in favour of his character, Anicrazy has signed the turtle for season two. Since Pikachu, Charizard and Squirtle have been taken on, Bulbasaur was signed too to complete the gang of four. Talk about a lucky break!
Squirtle and Bulbasaur eyed Anicrazy, who fidgeted uncomfortably.
"Deoxys was originally set to reprise his villainous role in MST3003, but was cut out of the scheme of things. Anicrazy claims this was because of creative changes and his desire to give the show a new look, but sources close to the author say it was actually because Deoxys demanded his pay be doubled, as a result of which he was cut out.
"So not true!" yelled Anicrazy.
"Actually, cutting Dee-sis out is a bit hard to swallow," said Pikachu. "Everybody liked the guy."
"And they'll like the new antagonist," snapped Anicrazy. "I just hope this news segment doesn't go and ruin —"
"The show's second season carries an all-Johto team, which means that the most likely new antagonist is Unown.
"And it did!" yelled Anicrazy. "You know, this is so stupid. Why would I cut out Deoxys and take on Unown because of contractual disagreements? The Unown would be way worse! Did you guys know each of the twenty-six Unown wanted a separate contract, perks, and a million dollars per episode each?"
"It has been confirmed that Ash's Johto gang, that is, Heracross, Noctowl, Cyndaquil, Totodile, and Bayleef have signed contracts with MST to appear in the show's new season. They were all unavailable for comment and could say nothing about their respective characters.
"Yeah, probably coz I haven't thought of anything myself!" yelled Anicrazy at the T.V. screen.
"Much to the disappointment of fans, Psyduck, Azurill and Gyarados will not be making comebacks unless people vote heavily for their reappearance. The current plan is to have two of Misty's Johto-water-types in the show, which means Corsola is set for an appearance. However, since Misty caught only one Pokemon in Johto, the identity of Misty's second Pokemon is to be a subject of speculation.
"Glad they don't know everything," muttered Anicrazy, relieved.
"As he did not appear in season one, May's Blaziken was set to star in MST3003 along with Skitty and Umbreon. However, recent creative changes have dropped May's Pokemon out of the loop entirely in keeping with Anicrazy's newfound obsession for the newfound.
"Okay, now that's just mean," sniffed Anicrazy.
"Instead, three Pokemon of a trainer introduced in Johto will star in MST3003. It is unknown who the trainer or the Pokemon are, but more information is expected as developments ensue.
Brock's Pokemon are also to be included in the show. Steelix, Crobat and Foretress are likely to make comebacks as they were in Johto and are Johto-native Pokemon. In addition to them, Geodude, and possibly even Vulpix, are expected to make appearances.
"Make appearances, make appearances," said Anicrazy. "Could she be any more repetitive?"
"Maybe you should star in MST," Bulbasaur told Anicrazy.
"Additionally, Pokemon of two or three more trainers will be included in the show. Anicrazy has told his creative team that the trainers 'would not be someone [they would expect. It [would be a great big surprise when [they found out [the trainers' identities.'
"By the way, who are these new guys?" asked Sceptile.
"You don't know 'em," Anicrazy told Sceptile. "The other five do, though." The Pokemon exchanged glances.
"With that, our news segment comes to an end."
"Good," said Anicrazy, turning off the T.V. with a sinister look on his face. "I have to make a call."
"Who are you calling?" asked Squirtle, as Anicrazy got out his cell phone.
"Some wun who kin track down da person who leaked information to the da news?" asked Meowth.
Anicrazy shushed them. "Hello? Pizza Hut?"
A/N: Please click the little purple button down there and type in some feedback in the magic box that appears.