I Love Him, I must Love Him Not

A/N: I am not switching from IchiRuki to IchiMomo! This story has just been stuck in my head. I am not a IchiRuki fan who doesn't support any other couples! I am also a big fan of HistuHina so here we go. And for those who have read my other fic Rukia's Dream next chapter is out!

Summary: No, If I fall in love with someone so reckless so young, I can't! I won't! Damn! I already have! Momo is quickly falling for her captain. But since losing Rukia he became slightly distant. Momo needs to break Ichigo out of his shell or will she be too late?

( memories are in italics and so are thoughts )

Prologue- Memories

"Wake up! Please you have to! It's my fault! All my fault!" she sobbed into his chest. He was strong he would live. She knew it. Now if only he would wake up.

Ichigo rounded around the corner using shunpo to get to his meeting faster. That stupid midget couldn't have woken him up! He was a captain for Kami's sake and he still got no respect. He had died for this job! Literally and what happens? They call him "Strawberry-taicho!" and "Carrot-top!" Wait till he goes bankai on there assess.

Wait what was that, he thought as he heard sobbing. There sat a girl crying. "Hey, what's wrong?" he asked .

"G-go away!" she yelled, her screams muffled by her hands.

"Whatever." he huffed getting ready to leave. He was late enough as is.

"W-wait! That w-was rude of me. Please don't go!" she yelled looking at the retreating figure. Hmm, a new captain, she thought noticing his white haori.

Ichigo sighed. "Are you gonna tell me what's wrong?"

"I'm so confused!" she yelled. Tears streamed down her face. Ichigo thought she looked a little bit scared. "Ex- captain Aizen! I really want to hate to him! B-but I-I can't!"

Ichigo was slightly shocked at him. "Hinamori Momo?" he finally asked.

She nodded. "Who are you?"

"Kurosaki Ichigo. New captain of the 5th Division. Nice to me-" he was cut off when a fist landed on his jaw. Fist kept attacking him, he could've easily stopped it but it wasn't really hurting.

"Aizen! Aizen is my captain! Not you!" she yelled her eyes closed. She really didn't mean it and she didn't want to punch Ichigo. More confusion.

Ichigo noticed her closed eyes. He grunted as his face got slapped. "Open your eyes, Hinamori-fukutaicho." Her eyes slowly opened. Brown eyes met amber ones and she collapsed on top of him sobbing.

Something snapped in her head. Aizen was evil! Completely and utterly evil. Looking into her new captain's eyes she realized it.

She sat there sobbing on Ichigo's chest. "I-I'm so s-sorry! Kurosaki-taicho!" she sobbed harder.

"Hinamori-san. It's okay. I'm fine. Come on! Get up." he said slowly helping her up. "Let's try this again. Kurosaki Ichigo. New captain of the 5th Division. Nice to meet you." he said offering his hand.

"Hinamori Momo. Lieutenant of the 5th Division. Nice to meet you Kurosaki-taicho." she said taking his hand. Even though her face was tear-streaked and her eyes were still red she gave a small smile.

"Hey Momo after the meeting, how bout you show me around our division?" Ichigo asked.

"Sure Captain!" she said smiling growing larger. What a great captain, she thought at his retreating figure.

"Momo, you should get some rest." Captain Unohana said sadly. She hated seeing Momo so lost.

"No! Ichigo needs me! He's got to wake up!" she cried wrapping her hands around Ichigo. She snuggled close to him and soon sleep found her.

Who is telling me to wake up? Ichigo wondered. Rukia maybe? No… this was different. He sighed, when would this eternal night end?

Knock Knock

"Come in?" said a sleepy Ichigo.

"I-I didn't mean to wake you! Sorry Captain! I had a nightmare. Could I um… you know?" Momo said looking down.

"Of course Momo. Rukia's is already asleep any-"

"Baka I woke up when Momo came in!" Rukia yelled punching Ichigo.

"Ow stupid Midget! What the hell was that for?"

"For being stupid!"

"I ain't stupid!" Giggling stopped their fight. They had forgot Momo was there.

"I have to go Ichigo!" she said winking at Momo. She knew she wanted to talk to her captain then sleep. She would be back later.

"Bye Rukia. Come on in Momo." he said stifling a yawn. She walked in the tiny house. Pfft… tiny was what she called it in comparison to the Kurosaki Manor. This place had two floors. Downstairs: kitchen, living room, a sparring room, and Ichigo's study. Upstairs: five bedrooms, three bathrooms, a private pool, and a private hot tub.

Then her nightmare came back full blast. "Oh captain! So… so many… death! Everywhere! Can we really defeat Aizen?" she sobbed holding onto herself as if she was breaking.

"Shh! Momo, listen to me. We can defeat Aizen and anybody else who gets in our way." Ichigo said in attempt to calm down his frantic lieutenant.

"People will die. Even if we win, people will die." she said voice cracking. Her captain was a big role in the war also a major enemy to Aizen. If she lost her new captain could she handle it? No. No she couldn't. She had been forced to admire Aizen but she had grown to befriend Ichigo.

"Don't worry Momo. Just protect the ones you love and as many innocents as you can. Leave the rest to me." he said yawning.

"May I stay in the guestroom tonight?" Momo asked. He (as always) had said to calm her down.

"Of course Momo-chan. G'night."

"Goodnight Captain." she mumbled as he headed upstairs. Oh God, has he had his hakama off the whole time? she thought noticing his bare chest.

Momo woke up with an arm draped around her. Wait an arm?? Ichigo! He moved his arm! she thought excitedly. "Unohana-taicho! Unohana-taicho!"

"What is it Momo?" the old captain asked tiredly. Working on Kurosaki was draining but she couldn't give up, Momo would be devastated.

"Look! Ichigo's arm is around me!" she exclaimed excitedly.

Captain Unohana walked over and pushed her reaistu through him. "Momo try talking to him. He is most comfortable around you."

The words broke Momo's heart. What if only Ruki-chan could wake her captain up? What if hers was not the voice he needed to hear most? She pushed the dark thoughts to the back of her mind and opened her mouth.

"Attention! Attention! All captains and lieutenants prepare for battle! The Winter War has begun!" Yammato-soutaicho's boomed over the intercom.

"Ready Rukia, Momo, Toshiro, Renji?" Ichigo asked grabbing Zangetsu. He had waited so long for this. At the same time all five of them thought, be prepared to die Aizen, 'cause we are coming.

They nodded in agreement. Everyone dashed out the room except Momo and Rukia. "If anything happens to me don't let Ichigo lose his smile." Rukia said sadly.

Momo chuckled nervously. "Does he ever smile?" She had a new goal: protect everyone she loves and innocents.

"Yeah you're right. Just keep him happy." she said with a small smile. Rukia used shunpo and left, leaving Momo alone.

"I'll protect my loved ones and all innocents. I'll be strong like all my friends. I will make sure we win this war." she muttered before grabbing Tobiume. She flash stepped to her captain.

"Be careful Momo. I doubt Aizen will play fair." Ichigo muttered before going through the Senkai Gate. Aizen was attacking the world of the Living, Aizen was attacking his home.

Momo quickly followed while calculating their advantages and disadvantages. Isshin, Urahara, Yoruichi, Nel, a few choice Arrancars, and the Vizards were fighting with them. Aizen, Gin, and Tousen were probably the strongest. She knew Ichigo wanted to face Aizen. Rangiku and Toshiro wanted Gin dead. Captain Komamura wanted Tousen defeated.

She was pushed out of her thoughts with a loud ROOAAR! Save your loved ones and innocents. She had only that in mind as she charge a Hollow attacking a lone spirit. She won easily.

D

It was the third day of war and both sides had suffered heavy causalities. Ayasegawa Yumichika had died in a battle with three Arrancars. Sentaro died by a powerful blast of kido. Nanao had died protecting her captain. Sasakibe, Urahara, Chad, Nel and many more died in this war.

"Gah!" Momo yelled squirming under an Arrancar. "Destructive spell number 1! THRUST!( I probably did that wrong oh well)" The Arrancar was immediately thrown back. "Snap Tobiume!" she screamed.

"Gin!! No Gin! No! Aizen you- you bastard!" Momo heard Rangiku yell. Oh no! Rangiku's in trouble, thought worriedly. She hurriedly finished off the Arrancar and ran to her friend.

"Goodbye Yamamoto! Goodbye Toshiro!" Aizen smooth voice ran through her head.

"No RUKIA!"

"Move Rangiku!" Hisagi yelled angrily.

"Don't get involved Shuuhei!" That was Rangiku.

"Yoruichi!!" Byakuya's voice wrung out with obvious concern.

All her friends. All Momo cared about were in trouble. She was frozen. In the middle of the most major part of the battle she is frozen.

Toshiro's reaistu disappeared and Rukia's was disappearing at a high rate.

"Goodbye Momo!" Aizen said from behind her. No, it can't be. She had failed. Aizen was about to kill her.

"Momo!" Ichigo yelled angrily. "DIE AIZEN!"

To Momo it happened in slow motion. Many things happening at once. Ichigo dove in front of her and ran Aizen through in the process. Aizen stabbed Ichigo in the process. Ichigo fell slowly to the ground.

"No!" she shouted sinking to her knees. Aizen had died instantly she had felt his reaistu leave permanently. "Ichigo! ICHIGO! ICHIGO!!"

"Captain Unohana! Captain Kurosaki needs immediate medical help!" someone yelled. Momo didn't care who. If Ichigo died she would officially have nothing.

People ran at her but the seemed to be running at an angle. What the hell, she thought. She then fell to the ground unconscious.

D

Momo woke up three hours later. She knew they had won. She knew Toshiro and possibly Rukia were dead. She knew Gin had died protecting Rangiku. What she wasn't expecting was, "Momo… Ichigo is in a coma and is barely stable."

She put one hand to her mouth and sunk to the ground sobbing. She had failed at protecting her loved ones. She had failed at protecting her captain. She had been protected instead. She sobbed for a long time before she walked into Ichigo's room.

"Wake up." she begged before falling asleep in her captain's arms.

"Ichigo. Captain. Please wake up! You have to I need you. So much has happened. I need to see your amber eyes sparkle. Oh Kami! Please wake up!" she yelled before breaking down into tears.

"Momo-chan. Why are you crying?" Ichigo croaked.

"Oh Ichigo! I've missed you so much!" She yelled hugging him. He hugged back weakly, everything on him hurt. He had a sense of dread but he was happy Momo was smiling. That's all that mattered for the moment.

A/N: Liked it? I thought I did pretty good. Please review! Sorry for any mistakes! I really wanted this out there fast.

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