Adventures in Grocery Shopping
He was in hell, pure unadulterated, fire and brimstone hell. Of course for her this was fun, she had this look of pure joy on her face; smile half between giddy and contemplative. Why was he in hell and Jude in heaven? Grocery shopping. If it were an Olympic event, as a pair they wouldn't even qualify, as a solo event she'd take the gold. So why did he even need to be here? He was nothing more than the designated cart pusher, or glorified caddy as he liked to think of it. It always started the same way, trekking through the fruit and vegetable aisle, her fingers reaching out to tap, prod, poke and shake everything. He could care less if the Watermelon echoed appropriately. The garish fluorescent lights were always turned up too high and Jude always managed to pick out the cart with the sticky wheel, which would alternate between emitting the grating sound of metal on metal and being completely unable to turn. And Jude had to do grocery shopping at one in the morning, every other Thursday. The store was always empty so she could peruse without fear of being hit by rabid shopping carts, or so Tommy assumed. In reality, on a work night (yes he was getting old); he had better places to be then the local Sobey's.
She was trying out a low-carb diet, claiming she needed to lose five pounds before the wedding. By the time they hit the bread section, Tommy had already lost the will to live, and a fight is brewing as they try to decide which type of low-carb bread to buy. He wants the low carb bread that isn't low carb, and she calls him a jackass and it just degenerates from there. There isn't a hope in hell he can even glance at the croissants, cakes or cinnamon buns. Jude starts walking faster, forcing Tommy to swear under his breath and push the groaning cart a harder to keep pace. He knows to avoid the seafood entirely, because other then shrimp, she won't eat it. Just mention fish and she gets this look of disgust on her face, claiming that Flounder is her favorite Disney character, and ingesting fish would be a betrayal. Yeah, okay and the reason he doesn't eat moose is because Bullwinkle was his childhood hero.
When it really starts to get painful, is the meat section. It's when Tommy suddenly becomes Bobby Flay, and every cut of beef needs to meet some standard Jude knows he doesn't have. As far as she's concerned, if it isn't open it's good. But he's king of the grill (according to the apron he wears). So that somehow justifies spending forty freaking' minutes staring at packages of ground beef and eying cuts of meat like a health inspector. Jude gives him this much, manning the cart and staring lazily at the overly bright shelves that beckon. Occasionally Tommy makes comments about buying a rack of lamb or finally trying out that ten pound steak. That's when Jude finally pulls him away, because she will not eat Lamb Chops (the food or the sock puppet), and ten pounds of steak is never a good idea.
Back on even ground, with Tommy momentarily refreshed they tackle the dairy section. She drinks skim, he drinks 1, and they even have separate color coordinated containers. Four kinds off cheese are piled on, some in blocks, some shredded, and one floating in goop, As Tommy so lovingly calls it.
"Why are you eating cottage cheese, again?"
"Five pounds, Tommy, living with you is making me fat." Jude shakes her head at him, fingers latching onto a small carton of Chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. He raises an eyebrow, eyes darting between her and the ice cream, but just earns another shake of her head.
"Not a word Quincy, not one word." He's a jackass though, one who likes to push, even when it results in bodily harm, and yeah he's a badass. Tommy opens his mouth to really earn a slap upside the head but Jude is quicker, silencing him with a finger to his lips. Leaning into him, their noses almost touching she gets a deadly look in her eyes, a glint of grey in the deep pools of blue.
"Think about whether that sentence is worth it, Quincy. Because I have your mother on speed dial and I will tell her that her only son doesn't want to give her grandchildren because his job is too important. And I will fake cry! So unless you want to have this discussion with her when she comes into town next week, I suggest smiling, nodding and cart pushing."
His eyes narrow and he pushes closer, looming above her by a few good inches, his mouth set in a firm line, almost daring her to go through with it.
"You wouldn't."
Jude just scoffs, throwing a few frozen dinners over her shoulder and into the cart, not the least bit phased by his intimidation routine. It didn't work in getting him the remote and it definitely wouldn't work now.
"Have you met me Quincy? I'd do it in a heartbeat, if it meant you would have an overbearing mother breathing down your neck and I could have some peace."
"She's not that bad."
"She wanted to choose the menu and write up the guest list, not to mention have your four cousins, who I've never met, be my bridesmaids!"
Tommy winced, remembering that painful experience in detail; he still had the nail marks from where Jude had dug her fingers into his thigh.
Conceding defeat Tommy soldiered on, bored out of his mind as Jude scanned the frozen food aisle. Making faces at the omelet in a box display. She wondered aloud about who could eat that and Tommy just shrugged, if it meant less time cooking he was fine with it.
The cleaning products aisle went by like a blur, because he cleaned and she didn't, plus she hated the smell of sanitizer, which no one could smell but her.
Jude always whined about when they could get a puppy as they ambled through the pet section. Her voice resembling the pre-teens he had spent years trying to outrun, as she fingered the chew toys and pointed at the dogs on the Milk bone packages.
"You promised Tommy."
"I know girl, but we're never home."
"Then make Darius allow dogs in the studio, tell him if he doesn't you won't get sex."
"Hey! Let's be reasonable here. How about we wait for the house to get out of escrow that way you'll have the home studio and you can take the dog there."
Jude rolled her eyes at him. "You're just afraid to stand up to Darius."
Jude stopped mid step, brushing herself against his side and biting her lip in that way she knew made him crazy. Her finger slowly trailed along his leather jacket, tracing imperceptible circles in the material. She leaned forward, her lips brushing against his ear, breath hot against his skin.
"You know that thing I do with my tongue?" He nodded, gulping a little at the pleasant memories. "And that position which only years of Yoga, got me flexible enough to do?"
"Yeah." His voice raised an octave, an almost squeak which he tried to shrug off, but only earned a knowing smile from Jude.
"Consider those special occasion treats, until I have a freaking' puppy. And I mean birthdays, yours, not mine, maybe Christmas and possibly Arbor Day."
"So what you're saying is puppy or no Jude time."
"I knew you were smarter than the average ex-boybander." She pinched his cheek and continued down the aisle, singing beneath her breath, something that sounded oddly like 'sex deprived, sex deprived, you 'gonna be sex deprived."
They got to skip right to the coffee selection, as usual the cart got filled with every vanilla, nut based flavor, even though she drank regular with a little milk every morning. Tommy was starting to wonder what he would find while packing up the kitchen cupboards for the move, most likely the same coffee flavors but months older. Smile and nod, just smile and nod. No pasta allowed unless it was whole wheat, those were the nights he lied about working late so he could grab a burger on the way home. The cookie aisle was Jude's Mecca, Sadie had her malls, and Jude had her Oreos, chocolate fingers and shortbreads. Tommy turned a blind eye, knowing it would just get him in trouble anyway. Not that she needed to lose weight, yes she had filled out, but the girl was a toothpick before, now she was a shapely toothpick.
"Quincy?"
"Yeah girl?"
"Stop staring at my ass and keep up."
Candy, all different kinds, colors and textures laid out before his eyes. His fingers twitched at his sides and eyes growing round as the flitted from one bin to another. Jude just watched in amusement as he fished out licorice by the pound and gummy worms just to get a 'balanced' meal.
"You have a problem Quincy."
"Come on Jude! You can't tell that looking at all of this candy doesn't make you the least bit tempted."
She shook her head kissing him softly on the lips. "You really wanted to meet Willa Wonka when you were little, didn't you?"
"I still do."
Tommy got this goofy look on his face and Jude knew why she loved him so much. This time was about the two of them, there was no G-Major drama, no Darius breathing down their necks or wedding plans to finalize. It was perfect and simple.
"I love you." Tommy smiled at her admission, leaning down until their foreheads touched, rubbing his nose against hers softly.
"Love you too, girl."
The end was in sight; just the pharmaceutical/beauty aisle left and they were home free. Jude ambled between the styling products, sniffing the shampoos, even though they had at least ten lining the tub. Tommy couldn't resist picking up a few of the new gels, momentarily mesmerized by the spiffy packaging. When he looked up Jude was gone, setting the products back he scanned the maze of smaller aisles until he saw a flash of blonde. Her black sweats and his oversized sweater coming into view.
"Jude?"
She looked up startled, her eyes round and clear, but her gaze shifted all around him guiltily and he knew she was hiding something. It also helped that one hand was firmly hooked behind her back.
"What do you have? If it's that glue band-aid stuff, forget it. I glued my fingers together the last time."
Tommy watched her closely, the way her free hand floated over her hair, the giant sweater swallowing her whole. She toyed with her bottom lip, the edges of her mouth quirked up.
"What do you have behind your back?"
"Nothing. Tampons actually, lots of them."
"That aisle is way back there."
Tommy made a grab for her arm, only to have her twist out of his grasp, sending them both teetering close to the display. The box fell from her hand, cardboard against concrete.
Tommy stared at Jude, then back at the object lying open in between them.
Tommy glanced at his watch, it was two in the morning, and the fluorescent lighting of the store had been traded for the much dimmer lighting of the women's washroom. Leaning as casually as he could against the counter, he counted the seconds in his head, staring straight up at the corkboard ceiling. Cramped into the two stall washroom was bad enough, but the anxiety of the moment was threatening to send him over the edge. The soles of his shoes squeaked against the floor as he readjusted his position again. Alternating between drumming his fingers against the counter and twiddling his thumbs, he blew out a breath.
"Jude come on, it's been ten minutes." He stared at the locked stall door, listening for any movement.
"When is the last time you peed on a stick, Quincy?" Her irate voice pierced through the silence and he sighed, again.
When she finally emerged, she looked so tiny, overwhelmed by the fabric of his clothes, her hair hastily pulled into a ponytail. There was panic in her eyes and he slowly drew her out of the stall doorway.
"Jude?"
She shut her eyes slightly, tilting her head down and away from his gaze.
"Positive. All five of them." She held up the sticks, a myriad of blue lines flashing before his eyes. He collapsed against the counter, running his hands over his face. They stood in silence, cramped into the washroom, avoiding each other's eyes.
"So we're having a baby." Tommy finally broke the silence, his voice cracking as he grappled with the word baby. Jude nodded her head tiredly, joining him in leaning against the sink. Tommy slowly reached for her hand, entwining their fingers, feeling the edges of her engagement ring pressing into his palm.
"This is good." Jude looked up at Tommy her brows knitting together at the attempted reassurance.
"It is?"
"Well it means you can't tell my mom I don't want kids." He chuckled slightly, dodging her attempt to smack him. Despite it she couldn't help the way her lips quirked up, a little glint of happiness in her eyes.
Tommy took the opportunity to press his lips to hers, pulling away slightly to rest his forehead on hers. "We're having a baby." Jude's voice was hoarse as she repeated his words, adjusting to the idea.
"Yeah. God I love you, girl." The sincerity in his eyes never ceased to make her melt and she kissed him slowly, pressing her body closer to his, not content to leave more then a breath between them.
"So, what now?" Tommy asked, earning a beaming smile.
"Screw the diet; I want real bread, and real pasta and those big croissants with the chocolate drizzle stuff."
They stood at the check out, having finally redone all the aisles to Jude's content. Tommy was just happy to see real food again, and a lack of flavored coffee. He watched her peruse the magazine rack while he un-loaded everything. Grabbing an In style, bridal magazine and very tentatively a 'Today's Parent'. She smiled sheepishly at the way Tommy had stopped to look at her, sharing a secretive glance.
"Did you find everything you were looking for?" The cashier stared at the couple who linked hands and nodded in a cheesy way too smile-y way. Even Jude was slightly disgusted at how romantic comedy they were acting.
"So do you think this'll get your mother off my back?" Jude kept pace with the cart, breathing in the fresh air as they finally stepped outside the store. It had started to rain and the small pelting of water made the pavement shine.
"For a little while."
Jude snuck a sideways glance at Tommy. "You happy, Quincy?"
He met her gaze, smiling in that goofy, candy aisle way. "Yeah, you?"
"Yeah."
He pulled her to his side dropping a kiss on the top of her head.
Jude smiled up at him, planting a quick kiss on his cheek. "I still want a puppy."