Hey there, Sokka's Fan-Lawyer here! This is my first real, character fic and I hope that it turned out well (some of the paragraphs turned out a little long). While I was in my Inheritance Cycle high (book 3 -which will kick ass- comes out in only a few months…), I heard this song and for some reason I associated it with Murtagh. Anyway, I hope you enjoy the fic!
Disclaimer: I don't own the song Numb or Eragon…only two copies of the books.
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Numb
Murtagh slammed the door as he entered his bedroom for the first time in weeks. After what had happened at the plains, he really needed to be alone…alone with a hefty drink would have been preferable, but alone none the less.
He sighed, taking in the unfamiliar surroundings of the room that Galbatorix had given him once he had sworn allegiance to him. The room was luxurious, but to Murtagh, it seemed more like a prison then the cell they had kept him in beforehand.
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
Murtagh couldn't but be reminded of the room he had back when he had lived in Uru'baen after his father had died. Back then, he had no idea why Galbatorix had been so kind as to let him live there, but now, he figured that it was for the same reason he was here now: to be used as his tool. He had wanted Murtagh to be his little lackey as his father before had been, but once he had seen through the king, he got out of there as soon as he had the opportunity arose.
But here he was, his short-lived freedom taken away by the power of the ancient language, unwillingly betraying all the friends he had gained in that time; betraying his younger brother.
When he had seen Eragon at the Burning Plains, he would never forget the look of shock and betrayal on his friend's face, even after he had explained what had happened to him! How could he expect that Murtagh would choose to die for the Varden?! The bastards kept him locked up 99 of the time they had been there! Now, he was a dragon rider, walking in his father's footsteps….
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
I've become so tired, so much more aware
I'm becoming this, all I want to do
Is be more like me and less like you
Murtagh felt Thorn try to make contact through their mental link, but he ignored it. He hadn't wanted any of this: becoming a dragon rider, being involved with the Varden, none of it!
Can't you see that you're smothering me
Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
Every step I take is another mistake to you
And every second I wait is more then I can take
Everyone seemed to want his loyalty! Galbatorix, the Varden, Eragon, all of them! Couldn't they see that they were crushing him, tearing his spirit in too many directions; all because they were afraid to lose their hold on him.
As a result, he has ended up hurting more then one side: Eragon and the Varden ended up being the ones who lost him. They thought that he wouldn't be, couldn't be turned to Galbatorix…but they were wrong.
He couldn't take it! It seemed that no matter what he did, where he went, someone hated him for it!
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
I've become so tired, so much more aware
I'm becoming this, all I want to do
Is be more like me, and less like you
"You've become your father." Eragon had said during their confrontation; and not only him, but everyone he had met somehow compared him to the bastard! Would he never be free of him, even when he was dead and Murtagh wasn't?!
But now, it seemed that he was more like him then ever, despite Murtagh's best efforts….
And I know I may end up failing too, but I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you
Murtagh stared at the gedwey ignasia on his right hand, the mark that was evidence to his new position. Even with the power of it and Thorn, there was no guarantee that he would live through the on coming struggles.
Had Eragon ever felt this kind of doubt? Probably, but he still managed to get by somehow, living on despite what the Empire did, what normal people did just to get by; he was trying to protect them all! And yet, here was Murtagh, his older brother, the one who was supposed to protect him, help him, on the other side of the war.
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
I've become so tired, so much more aware
I'm becoming this, all I want to do
Is be more like me, and less like you
Murtagh sighed as he got out of the bed and began to prepare for the summons that would surely arrive. A few minutes later, a servant was knocking on the door, proving Murtagh correct.
After a half hour, Murtagh left the throne room with his new assignment. He was supposed to head out to a village near Helgrind that wasn't paying enough taxes and 'encourage' them to pay up. He sighed as he set out, the guilt of his upcoming actions already forming….
Wouldn't you think he would be numb to these things by now?
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Well, that's it! I hope you liked it!
Read and Review or I'll…SUE YA!!