A/N: I came up with this idea sometime around 2 AM. (that explains a lot) Been a while since I've written; hope this is okay. I'm also awfully tired and too lazy to revise this, so there may be typos. I've never written alt!Livia or alt!Lincoln, so sorry if they're not in character! ^^' Instead of alt!Livia or alt!Lincoln, I'm just going to write Liv or Lincoln. Just know that they're in the alt!verse.
Sorry it seems kind of jumbled. It's supposed to be like that, I don't have bad grammar.
Hopefully someone will enjoy this, because I certainly don't. But then again, I never like my own writing. *shrug*
It should not hurt this much. It shouldn't. This is my fault. All my fault. And it shouldn't hurt like this. But it does.
The painful thoughts circled around in Liv's mind over and over, repeating like some horrible mantra that just wouldn't leave her alone. And just as soon as she thought she had got it under control, his face appeared in her mind again, and the pain returned, sharper and fresher than ever.
It had been three days. Three days since Frank had left her. Three days since he had discovered her secret. Well, it hadn't really been a secret, since she hadn't even known herself. But still. He knew. And now he was gone.
Three days should be enough time to get over someone. Especially someone you hadn't truly loved. No. Wait. Liv had loved him. Or had she? It was all so confusing, and horrible, and disgusting, and she just felt sick to her stomach. Something told her it was more than just her morning sickness.
She thought she loved Frank. She always had. Right up until he had knelt down on one knee and proposed to her, and she had frozen, completely terrified and feeling so utterly helpless. Yes? No. Yes. The guilt was almost too much. So she had said yes. For Frank. Because she loved Frank. Not him.
Three days was not enough time to get over someone. Liv could still clearly remember the look on his face, the hurt, the confusion, the betrayal. Why why why? It had asked. I thought you loved me!
Liv had begged silently for him to not leave, for him to come over and hold her and tell her everything was going to be fine and he was okay and she was okay and it was okay. But instead, he whispered the words that killed her inside. "You were going to marry me." And then he was gone, leaving her to cry alone and drown in her own remorse.
And here she was now, sitting alone on her couch in her empty apartment, all traces of Frank gone for most likely forever. She gritted her teeth against the sting of tears now forming in her eyes. She would not cry again. She would not be weak. She would not let these emotions get the best of her. But God, did it hurt.
One month should definitely be enough time to get over someone. Especially someone you had faked your love for. At least, she thought she had. It was for the mission. I did it for the mission. I did not love Peter. I do not love Peter, Liv tried to convince herself.
She could still clearly remember those nights spent together, the taste of his lips and the feel of skin. She remembered it all.
One month was not enough time to get over someone. Because she also remembered the same look of betrayal in his eyes the day he discovered who she truly was. He had tried to hide it, keeping his face blank and apathetic, but she could see in his eyes how he truly felt. Why? Why would you ever do something like this? How could you? They had screamed.
How could I?
I did it for the mission. I had to, Liv insisted to herself. But was getting yourself pregnant part of the mission? A voice in her head nagged.
And now here she was, stuck in this mess. She was still in love with Frank—oh how she wished he were here—but at the same time she longed for Peter's touch, too. What a despicable human being I am. Now I've ruined, what, two, three people's lives?
And the worst part was she knew she absolutely deserved all of this, every bit of the pain and suffering.
Now they're all gone. I have no one left. No one at all.
Just then, Liv's cellphone suddenly rang and she jumped out of her thoughts. Fumbling for her phone on the coffee table, she quickly picked it up and answered the call.
"Hey, Livvy!" Lincoln's warm voice greeted her as she held the phone up to her ear. Liv couldn't help but smile, despite the current circumstances. Lincoln's good mood was always contagious.
"Hey Linc," she sighed. "Is something up?"
"No! No, nothing at all…" he drifted off uncomfortably. "Listen, Liv…are…are you doing okay?"
Liv paused for moment, unable to respond. Finally, she replied, "Yeah, doing good. It's been hard... but you know me. I'll live."
"I know. I'm just making sure, though."
The two sat in silence for a moment. Eventually Lincoln said softly, "Liv, if you ever need me, just know I'll be right here to talk to you. Always. 'Kay?"
Liv found it difficult to swallow with the lump now forming in her throat. She couldn't speak.
"Olivia?" he asked again, sounding concerned with her lack of response.
"Thank you, Lincoln. I'm… I'm glad you're my friend."
He smiled. "Me too."
And first the first time in a long time, Liv didn't feel so alone anymore.
A/N: Wow. I actually finished a FanFiction. This is a miracle!
Do they have cellphones in the alt!verse? I can't remember…
I actually really enjoyed writing alt!Livia. She's a really interesting character. Although I despised her at first for what she did to Olivia, I couldn't help but feel bad for her at the end of Immortality. And Lincoln… oh my gosh what a cinnamon roll… I just love him so much. I can't believe they killed him off… that was so unfair…
Reviews are appreciated! ^_^ Haven't written in a long, so sorry if this sucks.