I'd just like to say that while this story is obviously fiction and play on The Selection series, I am writing about things that I have experienced. I lost my father about a year ago from a rare form of bladder cancer that developed and killed him in less than a month. After that I was forced to drop out of college and work full time to support my mother and sister. I am currently working on a book about my dad and what I have experienced using similar situations that I will write about/ I am using this story as a way to practice on my story telling and to work through ideas. I would greatly appreciate all comments and would love to hear if you're enjoying the story. I am a sucker for motivational comments and I seek the approval from people I don't even know. I have a major issue with accidentally switching between past and present. And I apologize ahead of time for any grammar issues. While I do read through things before I post them, reading my own work gives me anxiety and I sometimes rush through it. (Another thing I'm trying to work on via this fanfiction). Thank you so much. :)

I had spent the entire day working, the Robertson's up the street were having a massive party and as a Six I was hired to clean, and decorate their entire mansion. I was beyond exhausted and I wanted nothing more than to just go to sleep.

When I walked in the door that evening I was bombarded by happy faces and a lot of giggling…I really hated giggling. Just laugh if you must, don't giggle. It's not cute, it's not adorable. It's stupid.

"What the hell is going on? Why are you jumping up and down like that?" I looked down at my younger sister, slightly irritated, but more confused than anything.

"A letter came in the mail, and an announcement was made on the tv! The royal family is having a Selection! Silver, you can apply! "My mother squealed, at that moment I hated her. She was a hopeless romantic, always in search for a fairytale. I, on the other hand, hated all things that had to do with dating and romance. I wasn't interested.

"Honey," she grabbed my hand and continued. "This could be really good, this could fix everything. Not only our money troubles, but you could find a partner. You could be happy."

I yanked my hand out of hers and started making my way towards my room.

"I don't know how many times I have to tell you, I'm not interested in finding a partner. I'm not interested in ever dating actually. I don't want to fall in love, I don't want to be saddled with a bunch of kids I can't afford because my husband died. I have absolute no interest in living in this horrible world, let alone bringing any innocent souls into it. End of discussion, I'm going to bed."

I slammed the door, my temper raging. I slid down on to the floor and put my head in my hands. I tried to take deep and calming breathes. Trying to keep the anxiety attack that was threatening to take over at bay, but failing miserably.

Since my father had died a few months before I had been left to take care of everyone, I paid most of the bills, and as a result of taking on this burden I developed horrible, all consuming anxiety. And I definitely had no desire to ever put myself in same situation my mother was in. She was completely dependent on our father and without him, she has nothing. Just some kids she can't take care of now, of course as her only child who's old enough to work I couldn't just let her drown. I took full responsibility and now I'm drowning. In anxiety and misery.

I got undressed and slid into bed, thoughts running rampant. I thought of what life would be like if I filled out the application. How life might be different if things were just different. But nothing would ever change unless I made the choice to change them. What would it hurt…

* Please review or comment if you like the story, and the direction it's going in. Suggestions and ideas are greatly welcome (: *