Nevermore reinvented
I woke up screaming I don't know why I was screaming or even what I was screaming all I know is that I had a bad dream. "Are you alright, Max" a voice came from beneath me. Yes, you read correctly beneath me and no it wasn't Fang (only I wish it was) it was Dylan. I immediately got off him and onto the cold floor; it was so cold that I immediately bounced back onto Dylan.
I hated how goose bumps rose all over my body when I heard him say this. And I also hated how soothing how welcoming his voice was. Oh Fang why can't it be you here with me? Why can't you be the one I woke up on? Why can't you be the one here calming me instead of Dylan? Huh. Well it isn't Fang its Dylan and I have to learn to live with it.
"Are you okay Max?" he asked. His voice giving away all the emotions. Huh, amateur. Even Angel was better at hiding her feelings. Then it hit me like a huge boulder. Angel. Where was she? Was she even alive? My baby, she had just disappeared? I wish I could say she ran away from me or maybe that she was at my mom's or anywhere but this not knowing was killing me. These days I had a lot of not knowing – not knowing where Angel was, not knowing if she was dead or alive, not knowing how she was, not knowing if she was healthy or injured or just buried somewhere in the ground. And Angel was not the only uncertainity in my life. My feelings for Dylan are uncertain, Fang's return to the flock is uncertain, my leadership is uncertain.
"MAX!"
"WHAT?"
"You're a million miles away".
"Sorry, I was just thinking about Angel", I said, trying not to put too much grief or any other feeling into my words.
"Hey its okay. Everything is just going to be okay and we will find her, Max. I promise."
For once in my life I wanted to believe him, more than anything I have ever wanted to believe. I just realized that I was about to cry, meaning CHANGE THE TOPIC.
"What are you doing here?".
"You were the one who invited me in last night and well you just fell asleep and I didn't want to wake you up so you know, I let it be". Then it all came back in one rush.