Kyou: I'm back!
Toushirou: Just great...
Lisa: Roll Chapter! Yes! I get my own fanfic...
Lisa Love Co.!
Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach
Summary: Lisa Yadoumaru, owner of the Lisa Love Co., finds people someone to love. Each chapter comes a new pairing... Something I just came up
with...
'It's good to be in good business. I'm rich doing this stuff...', Lisa thought. It was true. She got paid for hooking people up. It wasn't that hard, & she had fun trying to guess the outcome of the pairing she created. Such works of hers were: Hirako Shinji & Sarugaki Hiyori, Love & Rose (she helped them admit their feelings. It was kinda mushy, so Lisa didn't really like it, but she got paid, & that's what matters), & her greatest work yet, Ishida Uryuu & Kurotsuchi Nemu (although it was kinda obvious these two would get together).
"Lisa-chan!", a girl with strawberry-blonde hair & big boobs screamed. 'Crap. That stupid girl. Wonder what she wants', thought the business owner. Before Orihime could get any closer to the vaizard, the more ditzy & clumsy vaizard, Mashirou, stopped her.
"Wait girlie! You have to schedule an appointment with Ero-san!", Mashirou yelled.
"Bitch!, don't call me that!", Lisa yelled, obviously not liking her title. "What do you want, big boobs?"
"I need help! I want to find someone!"
"Kurosaki Ichigo?"
"Yup yup yup!"
"Can't. He's gay"
"W-What?!"
"But I could get you to pair up with Four Eyes or Muscles"
"Sorry! They're close friends. I would never..."
"How 'bout we get some shoujou ai?"
"I don't know. You think I should, Lisa-chan?"
"I don't know. I'm not you, big boobs." This was getting annoying. Couldn't she just pair up that woman w/ Mashirou & get it over with? "How about a nice, strong shinigami?"
"Which one?", Orihime asked, cupping her chin in thought.
"Sigh...alright. We gotta look around town for someone", Lisa said. Grabbing Orihime by the back of her collar, the vaizard dragged the young woman across town, pointing at guys for her to hook up with. "'Bout that one? Or that one? Or maybe that one? No?"
"Sorry. They're not my type..."
"What's your type then?", Lisa said, annoyed.
"Kurosaki-kun!"
"I'm telling you! He's G-A-Y!"
"Really? Can't I use pesuasion?"
"Not unless you have a penis"
"How about Kuchiki? She likes you, doesn't she?"
"Really? You think so? I always thought she liked Ichigo, but you're telling me he's gay, so he wouldn't like her back, unless Rukia was actually a man, but she totally looks like a woman, unless she was using some kind of kidou to disguise herself...-blah blah blah blah" There you have it! Orihime talking nonsense again. As usual Lisa wasn't listening. She was getting payed by the hour, so no worries.
"Ugh. Do you want her or not?!"
"Um...okay! How should we do it?"
"First, we've gotta confirm she likes you that way. If she does, we're in"
"How do we do that?"
"Leave that to me..."
At the end of school, one Kuchiki Rukia was pulled to the side by Lisa.
"Kuchiki Rukia, right?"
"Yes. You're one of Ichigo's friends, right?"
"I'm Yadoumaru Lisa. What do you think of this?", Lisa said, bringing out one of her erotic magazines. She flipped through some of the pages, to find Rukia's blush grow by each page. "I see. Meet me in front of the school at 4:00!"
"What?" Before Rukia could get her answer, the vaizard was gone, leaving a very confused Rukia.
It was 4:00, & Rukia was waiting outside the school.
"I can't believe I'm doing this..." Just as Rukia was about to leave, Lisa, dragging a whining Orihime, showed up. "Yadoumaru, what are you doing with Inoue?"
"You two are going on a date!"
"Did you have to put it so bluntly?"
"Not my problem, you got it?! She wants you, you want her. I'm just helping to speed up the process"
"Lisa-chan! Stop embarassing me!", Orihime whined.
"Shut it big boobs! You want her, don't you?!", Lisa said, eager to get this over with. Rukia approached Orihime, bent down, & framed her face.
"Is this true, Inoue?", Rukia asked.
"Yes...", said Orihime, trying to hide her blush.
"Another job well done! I'm expecting my payment by tomorrow, big boobs", Lisa said, walking off, giggling at the thought of those two doing who-knows-what...
Kyou: So, Hitsu-chan, what'd ya think?!
Toushirou: Shoujou ai? I don't like it.
Kyou: Nudges at Toushirou's arm Ichigo's gay, 'member? I'll tell Lisa...
Toushirou: No you're not!
Kyou: Lisa-chan! Can you do something about them later?
Lisa: I'll get to it in a few chapters...Mashirou! Who's next?