AN: HEY PEOPLE! I have finally decided to write something. It makes no sense at all and I will probably confuse a lot of people.
WARNING: THIS IS COMPLETE CRACK! MAY CONTAIN SLASH, VIOLENCE, ANIME CHARACTERS BEING OOC AND WHATEVER ELSE POPS IN MY HEAD. IF INTERNAL BLEEDING OCCURS THEN DON'T BLAME ME!
Disclaimer: I dont own Death Note or Satan. I only own his soul.
The Dangers of Eating Chocolate
Sable: *munching on brownie*
Satan: What are you doing?
Sable: Eating chocolate brownies. What does it look like I'm doing?
Satan: But it is 7:29 AM. Why are you eating chocolate brownies this early?
Sable: Wanted to.
Satan: Okay. Have fun with that. *Walks away mumbling about human stupidity*
Sable: bye bye!
Sable: *munching a cookie*
Satan: Now what are you doing?
Sable: Eating chocolate chip cookies.
Satan: It is 9:34 AM. Why are you eating chocolate chip cookies.
Sable: I was hungry.
Satan: Okay. *walks away*
Sable: why does he insist upon asking stupid questions. GEEZ!
Sable: *holding head*
Satan: Now what is wrong?
Sable: I ate my chocolate ice cream to fast.
Satan: If you keep eating all of this chocolate, you will turn into chocolate.
Sable: COOL! *headache forgotten* Then I could eat myself.
Satan: *sighs in exasperation* What if someone else ate you instead?
Sable: They wouldn't be able to catch me.
Satan: If you say so. *walks off*
Satan: WTF!
Sable: What?
Satan: YOU TURNED INTO CHOCOLATE!
Sable: I DID! SWEET! *starts to lick fingers*
Satan: THIS ISNT GOOD!
Sable: Yes it is. I am quite tasty. Want to try some? *holds out finger*
Satan: *sighs* I guess I am going to have to show you that it isn't good. *walks off*
Sable: *licking fingers*
Satan: *comes back with Mellow from Death Note* I told you there was a chocolate person.
Mellow: CHOCOLATE! *runs at Sable*
Sable: MY CHOCOLATE! *runs away*
Satan: *watches Mellow chase Sable* I warned her. No one ever listens to me.
Sable: *stops in front of him* Did you say something?
Satan: ARG!
Sable: *wrestling with Mellow* YOU SHALL NEVER GET MY CHOCOLATE!
Mellow: I NEED THE CHOCOLATE!
Sable: RAPE!
Mellow: *jumps off* I'm not raping you. I am trying to eat you.
Sable: *uses this time to run away and hide*
3 hours later
Sable: Where did Mellow go?
Satan: Lured him away with a truck of Hershey's bars. Where did the chocolate go?
Sable: I licked it all off. It was only a chocolate coating.
Satan: Whatever. Do you now know why you shouldn't eat so much chocolate?
Sable: *munching on a chocolate covered pretzel* What did you say?
Satan: ARG! *slams head on wall*