Sudden Inspiration: Rewrite!
Author's Intro and Explanation: Hello, the majority of you people who have read this would formally known me as "Yukimura-san". As you can see, I have changed my pen name. I am sorry for the sudden change without notice and for the discontinuation of the original story. The reason why I have discontinued the original is because there were so many mistakes in there. Every time I look back at it, I cringe in shame. However, do not fear! I have a new writing style and I plan to take the plot on the original speed (I rushed it in the original one _") and make it longer, funnier and romantic for all you picky ones! I hope you'll all enjoy this new version and once again, I do apologise.
Chapter One: Little Victim?!
I remember once, when I was small.............
I went on a carousel during a fair……………...
The carousel went round and round………….
Going up and down….and then I saw………..
How blurry everything was, how fast I was
(Chorus)
Is this how life works?
I have always wondered, do we go
Round and round all day long?
Is this how life works?
I have always wondered, why is it we
Always going round and round in circles?
Is this how life works?
When I got off the carousel, I looked around; everything was as it was, not stationary but crystal clear
I then saw a flower on the grass; it was swaying side to side, going on with the flow, not giving a notice to what's around it.
Again, I had started to think...
(Repeats chorus)
(Repeats the last line in chorus 3x)
I don't know….
(Repeats chorus)
One of the band members, a teenage girl with auburn hair and glistening jade green eyes, stepped out to the wild crowd with a big smile on her face.
"How was that?!" she shouted at them on the microphone. The crowd went even wilder than before. This brought a smile to her lips. "So who wants more?!"
"We do!" shouted the crowd as they start jumping up and down with anticipation. "We do!"
"Alright, how about one more song before the concert ends?"
"One more! One more!" chanted the already wild crowd. Another member stepped up, also a teenage girl but this time she has purplish blue hair and her amethyst eyes twinkled with mischief.
"Alright, then here's your reward!" she shouted out to the crowd and they roared with enthusiasm. The second girl moved to the microphone while moving her long hair out of her face. Her amethyst eyes brightened up with excitement and anticipation. The first girl moved to the left and strapped her black and white guitar. She too, brushed her short strands of hair away from her face and her jade green eyes were as bright as they can be. The drummer tapped her sticks together, starting the countdown.
Do it now or never, I don't care which ever
Just hurry up and make your choice,
Just hope it won't be your last choice
'Cause I don't have time to wait
I got loads of work on my plate
(Chorus)
So just do it now or later
I don't care which ever
Time is a-wasting
Time is never waiting so
Just do it now or later
Either one I don't care
Just hurry up and choose
And hope that it'll just go smooth…
Tick, tick, tick, tick
And a tiny little click
Tick, tick, tick, tick
The clock only said "tick"
Time won't be waiting for you
So just hurry up and choose!
(Repeats chorus)
Tick, tick, tick, tick
Tick, tock, tick, tock
Tick, tick, tick, tick
Tick, tock, tick, tock….
(Repeats chorus)
Just hurry up!
Just hurry up!
It cannot wait!
Not on my plate!
Just hurry up!
Just hurry up!
Hurry up…
Now or later….
When the song finished, the crowd cheered wildly and as loud as they can. The band members gathered out to the front, all of them were breathless and amazed on how the events have turned out. One of them took the microphone.
"We like to thanks you guys for coming here to our concert," she began and waited for the cheering to stop before continuing on. "Without your support, we wouldn't have pulled this off."
She handed the microphone down to her band member next to her.
"Just to let you all know, Clover will be on break," she started. She continued on when the crowd gave no reaction. "We're not breaking nor will we be on indefinite hiatus. We're just going to take a break because as you all know, we have schools to go to."
She then handed the microphone down to the next girl.
"We all appreciate that you want to know when we'll return. However tonight, as a special bonus for all you guys, you will receive a free copy of our latest album which will be on sales next week!"
The crowd went wild again.
"But there's a catch," said the fourth girl, "By receiving you very own copy without charge, are a making a promise to us that you won't try and weasel out which school we go."
"Or where we live," said the fifth girl.
"Or what we do in our spare time," said the sixth. "Apart from that, make sure you check out our website for further updates on our now dormant status. Until then, see you next time!"
With that, they all left the stage while their crew started handing out the albums to the now very eager and excited crowd.
Meanwhile at the local teens only club...
Six very good looking teenage boys stood up on the stage and the crowd (the majority of them consists of scantily clad women or teenage whores) cheered them on.
The middle one (let's call him 3rd for the time being) took the microphone.
"It's great to perform in such unique crowd [insert shudder here] and this, unfortunately [fortunately, he thought] is the last song we'll be performing for you," he said. The crowd slumped slightly in disappointment but revved up again when the drums started the countdown.
The crowd didn't really pay attention to the song, all they did was sending suggestive looks. The lead singer felt like puking but not now, not yet. They needed the gig to go smoothly without any problems.
When the last note died out, the crowd whooped and whistled while the group of boys stepped out to the front of the stage.
1st took the microphone.
"Thanks for being supportive," he said and the crowd quietened down a bit, "We have some bad news for the time being."
1st then handed the microphone down to 2nd.
"We'll be taking a break. Possibly it'll be a long one."
3rd took the microphone.
"It's not that we don't like you," he added jokingly, yeah right... he thought. "It's just that we need to alone time." Away from you whores and bimbos... he thought inwardly.
4th took the microphone.
"However, feel free to drop by our website anytime to check the latest updates."
5th then took the microphone.
"However, during our break, we would prefer it if you don't follow us."
6th took the microphone to say the final word. In which they weren't very nice or heartfelt. Needless to say, they want to leave the club as fast as possible. All the girls (and cougars) were flirting with them. 3rd shuddered inwardly when he saw them and wished that 6th would hurry up.
"This means we don't like fans who like to stalk us everywhere. Stalk us and you'll face legal action. Have a nice night."
The crowd cried out in disappointment but when they turned back to the stage, the band left. Only the disco music was left on and everyone danced to that.
Outside, the group stood at the back alley catching their breath.
"Never ... again will," said 3rd as he glared at his friends. "I enter that place!"
"Well we had no choice," said 6th as he sent 3rd a smirk. "Clover's been taking out business since two months ago really."
3rd just rolled his eyes.
"So are you saying we got beaten by a group of girls? Give me a break! They're breaking up tonight as we speak!"
"True, although it's a disappointment really," said 2nd. 1st, however, revealed a different news.
"They're taking a break," he said, "Apparently so they can study at school."
"Pathetic really," said 5th as he started walking. The rest followed him suit. "Taking a break to study? How childish of them."
"Actually, isn't this why we're taking a break?" asked 2nd.
"Shut up smart arse!"
"Yeah you donkey's bottom!"
"You suck! Even my little victim's better than you."
"...the hell ..."
Author's note:
Thanks for reading this new chapter. What I'm trying to do here is to make my previously shorter chapters longer and quirkier than before. When I looked back, I found it to be bit too boring at certain parts and none of them seemed to get me to at least smile at my own genius. To my original readers, I do hope this is better than the original and if you could, please give me the support you gave me last time. Reviews would be much appreciated and in the next chapter, I will reply to them all. If there's any of course.
Reasons for rewriting:
Too boring
Too dull
Too short
Not enough humour
No one likes song fictions with songs that go on too long or not user created.
No one gets my weird humour anymore. The majority of the readers miss the hidden jokes and witty retorts.
I made it too complicated
It became a mess