History Shorts (Hetalia Style)!
A/N: First thing's first, I'll say one thing: the titles are not sexual innuendos unless I say otherwise. I'm also getting a good brush-up on my history while you guys get to read stuff. Depending on my writing, this might not be a good tradeoff, so review and let me know better!
By the way, if anyone wants to offer up a history short idea that they want me to write, fire ahead! I'll take on whatever! :D Common sense is not a commodity after all. Or I'll make like Congress and leave them for someone else. But I most likely won't go through all of them, like things that're too sensitive or too unspecific.
I apologize in advance for any offense I'll cause, because since you're writing about history, especially about the living stereotypes about that country, you're bound to offend someone.
Also, if I'm wrong about anything here, please tell me so I can fix it.
H/N stands for Historical Notes. You don't really have to read these, but it does explain the shorts.
I'm going to write this thing kind of like how Mr. Hidekaz Himaruya's wrote/drew Hetalia. In random one shots in story form! :D Not the most original, but hey, it's a good experiment. UPDATES WILL BE RANDOM! UTTERLY RANDOM! WAHAHAHAHAHA!
As the Doctor said: "No plan, no plan, now no weapons worth a damn!"
The Code of Hammurabi
"...a tooth for a tooth... Are you listening?!" Babylonia gave a light punch towards the shoulder of the other 'listener', who was busy farming the land.
"Ow!" Larsa yelped, rubbing his shoulder through the rough tunic he wore. "What is it old man?" he grumbled.
"My Code," he said proudly, his chin in the air arrogantly. "An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. Didn't you see how much violence it cut down?"
"That was years ago and you won't stop gushing over it. You're losing by inches now, and I don't see anything extraordinary like that occurring since your new king." Larsa replied sullenly, mouth twisting. Something clicked in his mind, and the city's whole countenance brightened. He gave a sneaky glance at the kingdom. "Oh, a tooth for a tooth did you say?"
Babylonia looked at him in utter shock. "You-You did pay attention!" Tears of joy quickly popped into his eyes. "I-I... I should build something to commemorate this moment-" he quickly cut himself off when he noticed the younger's reaction.
Larsa allowed a wide smile to spread across his face as he dropped his winnowing fork*. "Yes, you old crone. I finally did."
He landed a punch on the elder's nose, smiling at the the other country's shock as he staggered back.
A wolfish smile started to grace the country's face, his face still turned away. He started cracking his knuckles dangerously.
"Just remember," he tagged on carelessly, turning around and casually stalking up to the younger. "You started this."
"Bring it on, old man," the city spat and widened his stance. "I'm tired of your rule anyway."
The two flung themselves at each other, kicking up enough dirt to obscure the scene, wild curses piercing through the air.
"I won!" Babylonia shouted triumphantly, foot digging Larsa's head into the dirt and raising an arm victoriously in the air.
And then he was overwhelmed by twenty-six other cities.
*Winnowing Fork: A… fork-shaped object that separates the grains from chaff
(Thank you Wikipedia :D)
H/N: Babylonia is actually the name of the country, while Babylon is the city it's named for.
Whew, now that that's out of the way...
Okay, Hammurabi, King of Babylonia died with a great empire and handed over his rule to his son Samsu-iluna, where the empire then promptly (well, in 9 years kind of way) fell apart. A man named Rim-sin incited a rebellion where, tah-dah, 26 other cities were swept up in. By this point, a rebellion in the south was almost a tradition. A bit like Thanksgiving, actually.
Babylon beat them up for the first year or so and even killed Rim-sin but then another one (called Ilum-ma-ili) killed Samsu-iluna and became the king.
I kinda cheated with this and represented a city or two(…or twenty-seven), but hey, back then city-states were mini-countries! Kinda! ...ish.
And though the Code of Hammurabi might seem harsh by today's standards it was actually created to cut off more violence (though it was still really harsh). How? Well, it was either lose your eye after blinding someone or killing someone because they ate your apple. And contrary to popular belief, it wasn't actually equal. A noble blinding a peasant could just pay some silver and say it's all good. It went something like 'Oh, sorry I took your eye, here's some silver, because that's how much your eye was worth :D'.