Fang's Jar of Hearts
Nudge: So I wrote this one-shot mainly out of writer's block, and add that to listening to "jar of hearts" by Cristina Perry for colorguard inspiration and this is what you get. Hope you enjoy! ^^
Fang's POV
The sky above was a deep black. The stars showed perfectly contradicting the dark canvas behind them with a bright yellow glow. I had been flying for hours now and the bitter December cold ripped through my skin and began to filter far into my bones. My mind was telling me to stop and find shelter until morning but the blank land below said otherwise. I was somewhere in Kansas, but other than that all I knew off was that there was only a never ending expanse of barren terrain below my wings. It was times like this that I hated the most. For it was always in these moments that my mind began to think back on the past.
It has almost been a full year since I left the flock yet I could still feel them around me as if we were all sitting in the same room. On days like this it was almost as if I could hear Nudge rambling on to Angel about some random topic, the loud blast of another bomb Iggy and Gazzy set off, and Max screaming at the two pyros because of said bomb that just went off. Sometimes I completely forget why I left them in the first place. Worrying myself crazy over whether or not they were alright, or if they had been attacked again…
C'mon Fang, get over it. They're better without you.
I began to distract myself with the impossible task of trying to find some shelter. I maneuvered further down to get a better view of the earth below. About a half hour went by before I spotted a few lights off in the distance. It must've been a small town, and if I got lucky I would be able to find some type of shelter.
Max's POV
The flock and I had been traveling for the past couple weeks nonstop, apparently there was a CSM convention in Utah we had to attend. But by this time we were all tired and sore from the hours of flying and too little sleep. Not to mention the frantic escape from the Wal-Mart a few towns back that we didn't steal from. So I decided to treat them to a few days of rest on something besides a dirt floor and get their spirits up before we had to leave.
Lucky for us while we were traveling over Kansas, Angel spotted a small town with a hotel. We had been here for a couple days already, but even with the recent release of stress the flock's mood still wasn't the same. Since Fang left Iggy and Gazzy had been acting up way less and even Nudge kept her ramblings to a minimum. I expected them to at least return to their normal ways after a few months, but it's already been a year and I'm beginning to wonder if we will ever be the same.
Though I truthfully couldn't blame them. Every inch of my mind missed Fang. The way he would appear out of no where, his three word limit sentences, and even the way that he would look into my eyes and seem to now exactly what I was thinking. But at the same time I was angry beyond belief. He was the one person I thought would never leave, and then he turns around and brakes my heart. But by now I began to suspect that the flock was just as wounded as I was.
As of right now we all sat in Angel's, Nudge's, and my hotel room. Iggy, Gazzy, and I were watching TV on the couch and Nudge and Angel were sitting on a bed talking amongst themselves. And if I were lucky they weren't planning anything that I'm sure they would regret later. But my anxiety was only heightened when they exchanged mischievous smiles and broke up their little huddle, walking towards me.
"Max?" Angel said using her innocent voice.
"Yes sweetie?"
"Um, can we go somewhere?"
"Sure, getting out would do the flock some good. Where you wanna go?"
"Well there was a place I've been wanting to visit," She said smiling with almost too much innocence.
"Well…I guess so," I said getting up, "Yo! Iggy, Gazzy. C'mon guys we're going out."
When we arrived at the place Angel mentioned it was about nine and due to the winter, the sky was pitch black. The place had a bright neon sign above the door that said "The Voice". When we walked in the restaurant was packed with people and there was a thick cloud of chattering that filled the air. There were continuous rows of booths lining the walls and a series of tables filled the area inside the room. But aside from the wooden top bar beside us there was something else that forced its way into my attention. A large stage was at the back of the restaurant and currently there was stout woman with fake blonde hair belting out What's Love Got to do With It.
"Angel you did not bring us into a karaoke bar, we're leaving" I said looking at the eight year old beside me.
"Oh c'mon Max let us stay," Angel said trying to persuade me.
"Yeah. Please, I mean I've always wanted to come into one of these places. I mean they're always on TV and they look so fun cause you get to sing to a bunch of people like you're a real singer and have fun and-"thankfully Iggy slapped his hand over her mouth before she drowned us in a sea of rambles.
"Thanks Igs and guys we are not staying."
"Please Max," Nudge and Angel pleaded staring at me with a pair of bamby eyes that were absolutely impossible to resist.
"Fine." And before I could get the word out of my mouth completely the flock found an open table and made themselves at home.
We were there for about a half an hour and I have to admit I was actually enjoying myself. The food wasn't too bad and the singers weren't all that horrible considering the fact that this was a karaoke bar. Nudge even got up and sang some song by this band called Metro Station. I actually expected the night to go smoothly until Nudge got off stage and the host asked for volunteers.
"Why don't you go up next Max?" Nudge said to me sitting back down in her seat.
"Nah, so thanks."
"Oh c'mon, what, are you a chicken or somethin'," Iggy teased, only causing Gazzy to fulfill the oh so random urge to make chicken noises.
"Please Max," Angel looked up at me with clear blue puppy dog eyes and for the second time tonight I was forced into something I didn't want to do.
"Ugh. But I'm only doing one song," and with that I stood up and walked my way over to the stage. The host handed me the mike and I began to sing the fist song that came to mind…
I know I can't take one more step towards you
cause all that's waiting is regret
don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore
you lost the love I loved the most
I learned to live, half alive
and now you want me one more time
Who do you think you are?
running' 'round leaving scars
collecting a jar of hearts
tearing love apart
you're gonna catch a cold
from the ice inside your soul
don't come back for me
who do you think you are?
I couldn't fathom how deeply he wounded me. Almost everyday I asked myself why. Why would he leave us? Why would he say he loves me and then turn his back on everything we ever worked for? And how just how could he break my heart?
I hear you're asking all around
if I am anywhere to be found
but I have grown too strong
to ever fall back in your arms
Fang's POV
I finally got close enough to the small town and landed. According to my watch it was about 9:30 and as I walked through the town I found that there were very few if any places open. So seeing as I was too desperate to get out of this cold to care where I was, I walked into the first place that didn't have a closed sign hanging in the window. Which just so happened to be a place oddly called "The Voice". I walked in enjoying the feeling of warmth, when I heard a voice singing that I would recognize anywhere. As I looked up I saw her. Max. She had let her strawberry blonde hair grow out just the way I liked and from what I could tell she was just as stunning as the last time I saw her. When I looked her I saw her eyes widen at the sight of me and I knew that she felt the same jolt of shock that was running through my veins.
Max's POV I've learned to live, half alive
and now you want me one more time
I could see the crowd of people's attention settle on me and as I continued I saw another set of deep black eyes find their way to me, taking my breath away as usual. But somehow I managed to go on, fighting against the whirlpool of emotions running ramped inside of me.
Who do you think you are?
runnin' 'round leaving scars
collecting a jar of hearts
and tearing love apart
you're gonna catch a cold
from the ice inside your soul
don't come back for me
who do you think you are?
it took so long just to feel alright
remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed
cause you broke all your promises
and now you're back
you don't get to get me back
At this point of the song I could feel myself nearly shouting out the lyrics to Fang as if it were just me and him on the entire planet. Our eyes were locked together and the moment was only growing more and more intense. And for the billionth time I could feel a tear trickle down my face because of him. Who do you think you are?
running around leaving scars
collecting a jar of hearts
and tearing love apart
you're gonna catch a cold
from the ice inside your soul
so don't come back for me
don't come back at all
Who do you think you are?
Who do you think, you are?
By the time I reached the end of the song the entire bar was applauding me and my once dry face was covered in uncontrollable tears. I felt like screaming at him, hugging his frame just to make sure he was really there, and then I felt as if he didn't even deserve to ever speak to me again. I felt trapped by everything and in response I hurried off the stage and sprinted out of the back door into the ally behind the bar. I didn't really get too far out of the ally before I found myself huddled against a brick wall crying my eyes out over the situation for he umpteenth time. It wasn't too long that I sat alone before I heard the thump of two feet coming my way. I didn't even bother looking up, something just told me who it was coming after me.
"Max," Fang quietly whispered.
"Don't talk to me," I managed to mumble out as I got up and began to stomp angrily away.
"Max don't leave. I want to walk to you," he said grabbing my wrist before I could get to far.
"What now you want to talk?" I spat back turning around to face him, "You should have thought about that before you decided to walk out on me, not to mention the flock!"
"Just listen ok? Please?" he said trying to offset my rage.
"Two minutes. And if you give me one reason to make me more mad I promise either you will never see me again or I will kick your sorry ass from here to kingdom come and you better hope I choose the first one," I crossed my arms and began to listen.
"Look I never meant to hurt you I thought I was doing what was best, for you and the entire flock. Both you and I know that when we are together its impossible for either of us to focus on saving the world. And lets face it, the world needed you more than I did. I'm sorry I hurt you but-"
"Oh no fucking shit Sherlock! Of course you hurt me! But tell me this, did you even think about asking me what I thought about this before you left! Did you even fathom how much I needed you, how much the flock needed you! Instead of trying to fix it on your own I mean-. Ugh! You know what. Never mind, you're not even worth it anymore. Good-bye Fang," I began to turn away when he wrapped his hand tightly around my wrist, "Let me go Fang."
"No stay here and talk so-"
"So what? So you can leave again? So you can break my heart for the second time?" I screamed at him, more tears streaming down my face in a now steady stream, "Who the hell do you think you are? I trusted you with everything! And you let me down!"
"Max I'm not going to leave this time. I promise- ,"
"Well prove it! Prove to me that you won't leave! Prove it damn it! Prove-"
I felt it his lips crush down on mine with a fierce power and for some reason I couldn't resist him. I could feel all of my rage completely diffused as soon as his lips met mine. His hands found their way to my waist, pulling me closer and my arms were snaked around his neck in a matter of seconds. Not even a piece of paper could fit between us right now. Seconds rolled into minutes and before long I found myself loosing my breath. Fang pulled away keeping his hands around my waist and smiling that toothy grin that always made my world light up, no matter the situation.
"Max that is how you know I will never leave you again. I can't live without you, I tried and nearly drove myself into insanity. I promise to never hurt you again and if I do then I sincerely give you permission to kick my sorry ass from here to kingdom come," his grin only grew larger and for the first time in almost a year he managed to put the spark back in my eyes.