Author's Note: this idea came up to me a couple of days ago, I thought it'd be nice to write song fics that tell a story… I actually found it hard to find the songs that fit exactly in the plot but I made it ^_^ Some of the songs are very popular, some others I believe aren't. I know I listen to strange music ''''^_^ but I'll tell you everything about the song chapter after chapter. Tell me what you think of it and if everything is clear or not, it'll be hard to keep up the plot and everything by following songs…oh well '^_^. I really hope you'll enjoy it.

As my previews Gravitation fiction, there will be plenty of angst ( I can't help it, sorry '^_^), but much more to it too… the story will be longer. I know I haven't finished "will you tale care of me", I'll do it soon :)

Gosh, I talk a lot °_°

Anyway, I'm sorry to bore you with this, but then it's one of my concern: English isn't my mother tongue, I probably make mistakes without realizing. Don't flame me 'cause of it, drop me a line if you want to tell me where I'm wrong ^_^

Disclaimer: No, I still don't own Gravitation… Something never changes, does it? ;)

As well as I don't own this Pulp song, no even "My sweet prince"… I own nothing (;_;) to make this short

My sweet prince by Placebo

Do you remember the first time by Pulp

My Sweet Prince:

Track one: "Do you remember the first time?"

Touma pov:

"I'm so glad that finally we made it!"

Yeah, finally we can spend some time together, it has been such a long time since we last saw each other… and I really missed you, but I can't tell you, otherwise you'd run away from me again, and I'd crash… You look so beautiful that I'm tempted to reach out for your pale face and kiss your lips, but I can't, again.

How would you react if I did that?

It seems a sad-feelings-masquerade, trying to suffocate what needs air and freedom itself: my love for you.

If you only knew…

You sit in front of me, hiding a little smile, are you that happy to see me? Should I actually think that you wanted to _see me_?

I shake my head, trying not to think of it, it's sad to say but every time I think of you a rush of emotions runs through my entire body and I can barely hide the passion that runs free in my veins, you'd noticed it if you looked carefully. But you seem distracted, looking at something in the bag you have on your side

"It's been a long time, yes, I was surprised to hear your invitation on the answering machine of my mobile… "

"What is it that you bought?"

"Promise not to laugh at me, you'll think I'm growing soft"

Again that smile, but this time is so adorable that I have to look away from you. You are painfully perfect, utterly gorgeous, totally unreachable, and this is the part that hurt the most. My heart bleeds every single time your thought crosses my mind, never stops pouring red lymph, I think I'll die soon… I recognised that smile though, as an intimate memory that doesn't involve me. It's not me… Why does it hurt so bad? Why aren't you mine instead of…

"C'mon, don't be silly, just say it"

"It's a gift for Shuichi, I didn't think I'd ever do this, but I bought it for our anniversary…. Sounds almost sickening coming out of my mouth, doesn't it? I've tried to justify to myself this madness of mine, telling me it wasn't something I would do, but then I just had to, this strange sweet-romantic mood I'm in surprises me in the first place…"

I know I shouldn't have asked you to come out. No! I can't hear these words from you, words that were meant to be for me, said talking of a perfect stranger, a fucking stupid moron.

I have to get out, I can't see you like this, I want your skin under _my_ hands, I need your breath on _my_ neck, no other man deserve you, no one would know how to treat you and love you as I do.

My heart is beating fast, rage is taking over me, partially because I am blaming myself, I should have known meeting you wasn't a good idea, partially because I want to scream out my right to own you.

Mine, there's no time that can teach me you're someone else's, no evidence that can convince me, no words that can sway me.

But this play has to keep on its façade, no pain has to come out of my eyes and no anger from my words, I can't help it, though, but to feel them in each hidden riddle of my soul.

So I try to change subject immediately, so that I could enjoy your company without Shuichi's ghost hanging around when you are suppose to be with me.

We talk as old friends, I know you consider me as one of your closest, it's such a rare thing to hear you talking, not much, but at least these words are just for me.

I think I'm obsessed, but I don't care, as soon as you start looking at your watch I want to sink to the floor and cry and, at the same time, force you to stay.

"I have to go"

//You say you've got to go home 'cos he's sitting on his own again this evening.//

I'm the one that sits by himself every single evening, why do you need to go away?

That pink haired brat had have you enough, I lent you for far too long, now it's time to get you back…

If I told you this, you'd blame me, you'd think I were a freak, but then I know I'm not, because I love you and for this reason you have to be with me, I'm the one that ought to have you. Call it fixation, call it addiction, call it passion I don't care, just give me what I need: yourself entirely.

//I know you're gonna let him bore your pants off again.

Oh God, it's half past eight you'll be late.

You say you've never been sure tho' it makes good sense for you to live together. //

This is what you used to say and I believed your relationship was going to be over soon. No one can come close to you and not get burnt, I thought that Shuichi, to you, was a distraction, a toy.

//Still you bought a toy that can reach

the places he never goes & now it's getting late.

He's so straight. Do you remember the first time? //

I have all the rights to be angry at you and at him, you lied to me and trick me, but then I'll win in the end and you'll surrender.

"What's going on"

Your voice distracts me, I have to make up a plan, but not now, I don't need you to notice now what's going on on my mind, we'll have time to spend together

"I'm alright, no worries, I just got up too fast and I blacked out for a second"

"You're acting strangely today, first you call me and tell me to meet you, then you chat with me but it seems as you're somewhere else…"

"It's just a long time we haven't seem each other, that's all"

"Oh well, " you wave your hand and leave, no other words for me, no other smile, no other thoughts. You're going back to Shuichi.

I hate him, he's the responsible for this situation, he'll pay for it and everything will be fixed.

//I can't remember a worse time

but you know that we've changed so much since then//

You need to come back at what you were and remember me and you together…as friends, that's true, but things can easily evolve. My mind can't stop thinking of a solution for this situation that it's slowly but inevitably killing me… Shuichi should be erased from this Earth and you and me would be happy together, but I can't kill anyone. It's a limit I have, I recon, it'd be too easy to just make him vanish… But if I weren't born to be a killer, I might as well oblige him to leave _my_ Eiri and disappear. I just need a nice idea, but nothing is going to stop me, I'm tired of waiting.

//Oh yeah, we've grown.

Now I don't care what you're doing

No I don't care if you screw him just as long as you save a piece for me//

For now this is what I ask, does it sound much?

I want to taste your lips, savour your kisses, hear my name screamed at night, I need you to tell me you love me, I need you to yield and if you call for some help to push away that baby you have around, I'm happy to lend a hand…

I realize I kept on staring to the door where you walked out. Funny how in few minutes you can make up a life decision and feel so reassured from it: Shuichi has to be helped leave.

//Oh yeah now, you say you've got to go home.

Well at least there's someone there that you can talk to

And you never have to face up to the nite on your own.//

I won't, not anymore…

Soon enough things will change, and thinking of this, I leave the cafè with a smile.

To be continued…