WARNINGS:: Sephiroth drinks vodka and Genesis wears high-heels. Other than that, I think it's safe.
It all began at one of the frequent ShinRa office parties. The first time that he was rejected. The day that his appearance started to worry him.
He was held back by an assignment that had taken longer to complete than he had assumed, returning to Midgar much later than he had expected. He was going to be late at the party, and figured he'd get there and most of the Turks would already be knocked out… especially that Reno guy. Angeal was running through the ShinRa building's immaculate halls while buttoning his shirt up, trying to find the room the group had reserved. He pulled out his PHS and checked his earlier texts to see if anyone had sent him the door number… However, it was loud talking and shouts that allowed him to find where the party was held, because it had taken too long to find anything on his phone, his inbox filled with spam mail and chain letters, all sent by Sephiroth.
Angeal turned the knob and kicked the door with his knee, making sure he'd make enough sound so that everyone would hear him arrive. It didn't exactly have the wanted effect.
"Hey, sorry I'm la-
-Huh? Who's that old man?
-Hey Fair, is that your dad?" A big Turk with brown hair and a 2nd class had come up to him while most of the others were either talking, drinking, flirting or out cold. Upon hearing his name, Angeal's protégé stood up and walked towards him with a drink in his hand. He crossed the bright blue eyes and then looked behind Zack, taking note of that Reno guy giggling and drooling on the table he was sharing with his bald, long time partner and a few 2nd class SOLDIERs. In another corner, he saw Genesis' mouth babble like crazy, probably reciting LOVELESS to the dozen of female employees standing around him.
"Angeal? What are you doing here? Who invited you?
-Aren't you too old for things like this?" That 2nd class guy Kunsel or whatever his name is had also approached Angeal, and now most of the guests had their eyes locked on him.
"Well, Sephiroth told me about it so I--
-Whaaaaaahat? Sephiroth man, y'know we don't invite senior staff to our office parties yo!" That Reno guy came out of his state of giggling lethargy for a while and started lecturing the silver-haired 1st class. Sephiroth took a sip of his translucent drink, most likely vodka, and chuckled before turning to Angeal. "I'm sorry. It seems you are not welcome here."
Angeal put his palm to his forehead and left the loud room illuminated by flashing, colorful lights. How could this have happened? He even took the time to trim his manly goatee and change from his loved SOLDIER uniform to put on clean black jeans and a fancy white chemise. He felt very insecure about looking 40 years old and only being 25. And now, being rejected at an office party because he's 'too old'… while his best friends for life are actually older. Yes. Them. They could help him regain his youthfulness.
xxxx
Director Lazard: SOLDIER members, I thank you for your daily hard work.
That Reno guy: yo sorry bout yesterday I was out o it
Seph: Send this to 10 of your contacts and your day will be filled with laughter!
That Reno guy: but its better for u y'know drinkin aint good for the old
Genesis: Thou shalt visit if thou wilt require comforting
80889: worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
Seph: This is very VERY serious! Forward this to all of your contacts or you will get crabs!
Puppy: wont be able to make it at lv49s training room today head hurts :(
Angeal sighed as he put his PHS in his back pocket after reading the texts he got while showering. Seeing as Zack couldn't make it to training this morning, he took off his gloves and put down his sword on a shelf made especially for it, right next to his bed. He figured that he'd be better off to go see Genesis instead of lying around doing nothing and just get older. Oh Goddess no, that wasn't going to happen.
He knocked on Genesis' door before opening it right away, because he knew the man wouldn't even stand up to open the door if he was busy reading. Upon entering, he noticed two pairs of black knee-high boots. One had normal soles, which confirmed the presence of Sephiroth, since Genesis only wore high heeled boots. Angeal removed his shoes and placed them next to the fancier footwear, knowing quite well that Genesis would stab him if he'd walk on his fancy-pink-moogle-fur carpet with his sneakers.
He walked over to the dining room, where his two friends were seated silently next to each other, both drinking huge cups of coffee. Genesis was reading the Show Business section of the ShinRa Times while Sephiroth browsed busily on his PHS. They didn't even look up when Angeal sat across from them, both expecting another of these silent friendly meet-ups, where the three of them just sit down somewhere together and yet mind their own business, the only words exchanged coming out of Genesis' mouth whenever he feels like reciting LOVELESS. But today, Angeal needed advice from his BFFs. Because that's what friends are for.
"My friends, I need advice." Sephiroth cocked an eyebrow but kept his eyes on his phone while Genesis took a sip of his coffee and straightened on his chair.
"I must know what is your secret to remain youthful. You both are older than me and yet-
-We are far more beautiful. And don't get rejected. Is that what you wanted to say?" Genesis said with a smile as he placed the cup on the table. He bent forward, put his hands together and rested his chin on them. Sephiroth flipped his phone closed and looked at Angeal, who sighed heavily.
"The first secret is luscious hair.
-Wash it everyday with a full bottle of a shampoo and a full bottle of hair conditioner." As to accentuate their point or just on reflex, both man flipped their hair.
"The second secret is smell.
-Do not smell like sweat at anytime, not even during missions.
-Wash as often as you can, put on deodorant and perfume yourself." Genesis breathed in to smell his own sweet aroma, which always reminded Angeal of their younger days, running under the Banora White trees.
"The third secret is clothing.
-You must not wear something stylish, obligatory or comfortable.
-Wear something that puts you at your best and that makes you look unique." Sephiroth opened up his long coat, showing even more of his bare chest and Genesis straightened the collar of his crimson coat. At this point, Angeal couldn't take much more and put both of his hand to his face, scared he'd maybe let out a sob.
"And then, there is the last secret.
-The secret of the Goddess.
-Make-up.
-It is manly and heroic to wear make-up." The two 1st class SOLDIERs batted their eyelashes and Angeal finally understood why there was something so suspicious about them having accentuating black eyelashes while one had auburn and the other silver hair.
"Mascara.
-Lip gloss. Pink sparkly gloss has a good effect.
-Or even lipstick, I stole Scarlet's one time. The result was beautiful.
-Indeed. I also recommend you the occasional eye shadow or eyeliner.
-Yes, and you should use some concealer for that awful wrinkle on your forehead.
-And you should shave that facial hai--
-Alright, thanks to both of you. I'll be on my way now."
Angeal couldn't hear anymore, rubbed his eyes and put his shoes back on and left, after noticing his two friends get back to their earlier activities, now both smirking.
xxxx
He felt his confidence build up once again as he walked through the hallways of the ShinRa Building, whispers and whistles coming from every side. He had trouble adapting to these high-heeled boots and tighter clothes, but it didn't really compare to the trouble he had had in front of the mirror that morning, making sure his red lipstick wouldn't smear and washing the marks that his waterproof mascara had made on his eyelids and cheeks. The night before, he had decided to drop by the drug store and bought vanilla and strawberry scented shampoo, and like his friends had recommended, he used the whole bottle. He was delighted to discover that his black hair was now wavy and smooth, and he brushed it to the side so that bangs now covered part of his wrinkled forehead.
As the door to the elevator he was about to step in to get to the LV49 Briefing Room opened, he felt a heavy mass bump into him, making him trip over because of his high-heels. However, the heavy mass with black hair and sky blue eyes had saved him from the fall, an arm around his back and shouting apologies.
"I am so sorry my dear lady! Hmm, how could I make up to this unfortunate accident? How about… I know! A dat--
-Don't even think about it Zack." Zack helped him back on his feet, then crossed his arms and started looking up and down. Then he got dangerously close to his face. He stared for two whole minutes, in complete silence-probably his personal best-before shouting again.
"WHAT THE! ANGEAAAAAAL!? Is that you?
-Of course you idi-
-When did you start wearing high heels and woman's clothing? You even shaved your goatee! And is that lipstick I see? NO WAY!
-Yeah… Genesis and Seph's advice… do I look youn-
-HAHAHA! THIS IS TOO FUNNY!" Zack pulled out his PHS and took a quick snapshot, holding his stomach with his other hand, his laugh echoing throughout the hallway. He then proceeded to get back into the elevator.
And then he sent the picture of a very feminine Angeal to everyone on his contact list. Which basically means more than half of the company's employees.
Moral of this story; Never trust your metrosexual friends. Oh, and also, be yourself. But that's a lame moral.
A/N: I think that Angeal is the youngest of the three, I'm prety sure I read that somewhere.
A/N2: Big brown Turk is Martial Arts from BC. He had to have a cameo because he's awesome.
A/N3: I have no idea why the hell I wrote a fic centered around Angeal. I'm confused. ANJIRU
I WOULD LOVE YOU FOREVER IF YOU'D LEAVE A REVIEW :D Thanks a lot for reading!