12

The Story of A & M

Part II

The Return of Merlin

Two nights after Gwaine returned to Camelot a mysterious stranger in a cloak and riding a horse passed through the castle gates, the guards looked and watched but none tried to stop him. When he entered the main court yard and dismounted the rider heard the sounds of people running.

"Halt, what are you doing here at this late hour?" Percival asked as he and Gwaine approached but then Gwaine put his hand out to stop Percival because something dawned on him.

Percival looked at Gwaine confused as Gwaine put his sword away and slowly approached the stranger he stopped about two feet behind the stranger and waited.

Slowly the stranger turned and as he did Gwaine had a huge smile spread across his face but at the same time a tear escaped his eye and he grabbed Merlin and again gave him a bone crushing hug. Percival was still standing in the background confused but when Gwaine hugged the stranger and the hood of his cloak moved Percival got a look at his face and realized it was Merlin. He put his sword away and ran over; Gwaine had just managed to get out of the way before Percival had picked up Merlin hugging him as well.

"Can't breathe Percival" Merlin managed to say and Percival laughed as he put Merlin down.

"We have to tell the others" Percival said excitedly but Gwaine said no.

"No let's keep this quiet; it's more important we get him to Arthur quickly and quietly."

Percival and Gwaine escorted Merlin into the castle; he kept the hood of his cloak up hiding his face. It was very late so there were not many people moving around inside the castle and when they arrived at Arthur's chambers, the guards outside the door blocked their way.

"The king is sleeping" the one guard said.

Merlin looked and he recognized the one guard so he pulled his hood down and looked at him, the guard looked at him in shock at first but then he smiled. He was about to say something but Gwaine put his hand over the guards mouth.

"He came back to hopefully snap the king out of his depression, we know he is probably sleeping but we want Merlin to be there when he wakes up" Gwaine explained and the experienced guard smiled and gave the other guard the signal and they opened the doors to Arthur's chambers allowing Merlin to enter quietly.

"Don't worry, Percival and I will take full responsibility so you won't be in any trouble" Merlin heard Gwaine explain to the guards as the doors closed.

Merlin looked around the room and was stunned by how it looked; there were plates on the table with food that hadn't been touched and some with some food that was barely eaten. There were clothes all over the place and the room was just dirty. He looked at the bed and the bed curtains were closed and he could hear Arthur quietly snoring so he knew he was asleep. Merlin looked around and thought about what to do, because of his nervous energy he was trying to find something to do because he knew he just couldn't sit around.

He was nervous because he didn't know how Arthur was going to react when he saw him, would he arrest him, kill him himself or at least try to? Is he going to be mad at him, is he going to hate him? Should he wait for Arthur to get up himself or should he do like he used to do and open up the drapes and be cheerful like he had never left? He finally took off his cloak and quietly went about lighting some candles for some light and started doing what he could to clean up the room, he also opened some windows to let in some fresh air because the room smelled from the food, dirty clothes and it was just stuffy in general. Merlin noticed something new in the room, a large divider and when he looked around it he saw the large wooden tub that Arthur used to bathe in, he thought for a moment 'no more secrets, no more lies' he thought to himself and with a wave of his hand, he filled the tub with hot water and whispered a spell that would keep the water hot.

Soon he found himself getting tired so he sat down at the table and put his head down.

His eyes flew open when he heard a sound and he realized the sun was up, but it was still early in the morning. He looked around for the source of the noise and realized Arthur was awake. He started to get nervous again, the palms of his hands were getting sweaty, he thought briefly about getting up and running out of the room but his nerves kept him frozen where he sat. Merlin heard the bed curtains open on the opposite side of the bed from where he sat and he remained frozen as he saw Arthur stumble out of bed and walk over to the window closest to his bed. Arthur opened the curtains and then the window and then he sat down in the chair.

Merlin was stunned by what he was seeing, Arthur looked so thin and sickly; he looked about as skinny as Merlin was five years ago. He waited to see if Arthur would turn and look, if he would suddenly sense that somebody else was in the room but it never happened, Arthur just sat there slumped in the chair staring out the window.

As quietly as he could Merlin stood up from the chair and slowly walked to where Arthur was sitting, his heart was racing and he tried to keep his breathing calm. He was just a few feet away when Arthur must have seen him out of the corner of his eye because he jumped up from the chair and backed against the wall, his eyes were wide and he actually looked frightened. When Arthur jumped Merlin stopped dead and could tell his face probably looked like Arthur's, his eyes wide and frozen where he stood. For a few minutes they both just stood there looking at each other and Merlin noticed that Arthur seemed to be looking at him like he wasn't sure he was really there.

"Hello Arthur" Merlin said calmly before taking a very small and very cautious step towards him.

Arthur's face changed as soon as Merlin spoke, his face went from shocked and scared to sad and Merlin saw Arthur's eyes welled up with tears. Despite his thin, sickly appearance Merlin was surprised that Arthur closed the distance between them in two quick strides and slammed into him holding onto him like his life depended on it. Merlin was about to say something but stopped when Arthur started crying like he had never heard anybody cry before. Merlin just put his arms around Arthur and held him just as tight and let him cry on his shoulder.

After a few minutes, when Arthur had stopped crying they continued to stand there and hold each other.

Now that the sun was up and it was brighter in the room, Merlin noticed for the first time a portrait of Gwen and his own eyes filled with tears as he remembered that she was gone and he was remembering her.

"I'm so sorry about Gwen" Merlin whispered and he felt Arthur's arm squeeze him even tighter "thank you" he whispered back.

After a few more minutes they let go and looked at each other "what's the matter" Merlin asked looking at Arthurs face.

"I've had several dreams like this and usually when we separate I wake up and realize it was just a dream."

"This is not a dream Arthur I'm really here" Merlin said has he hugged Arthur again and then pinched his butt.

"OUCH" Arthur yelled as he jumped back rubbing his butt.

"I guess that never happened in your dreams" Merlin said trying not to laugh.

"No so you've proved your point" Arthur said.

"You know I could have your hand cut off for that."

"I'm sure King Arthur could but who are you? I mean I see a resemblance to the King but I don't really see him in this room. The King Arthur I know was never a slob like this, trust me I know I was his servant for several years. He never left clothes lying around like they were when I first came in here and there were never plates with rotting food and he certainly never smelled as bad as you do."

Arthur opened his mouth to argue but all he could do was smile and agree with Merlin. Without saying anything further Merlin took Arthur by the hand and walked him around the divider showing him the full tub of hot water.

"You get in and get clean, I'm going to go and get you food" said Merlin.

"No please stay, there will be time to eat later we have so much to talk about" Arthur said.

"Arthur I'm not leaving the castle I'm just going down to the kitchen" Merlin said and reluctantly Arthur agreed.

When Merlin entered the kitchen he immediately saw the large mean looking woman that he knew was in charge, he never knew her name but he remembered how she used to chase him out when he tried to take food, he was always surprised at how fast she could move considering her size. When she looked around and saw Merlin standing there a smile spread across her face and before Merlin knew what happened she had him in a bear hug that could give Percival a run for his money.

"Merlin it's good to see you again" she said happier than Merlin knew she was capable of being.

"It's good to be back" he said.

"Are you here for the king?"

"Yes he is actually feeling much better and is hungry so I came to get him some food."

"Wait right here and I'll put together a small feast" she said and Merlin watched as she grabbed a huge platter and started loading it up with all kinds of food. He thought it was a bit much but he didn't want to upset her.

It took Merlin longer to get back upstairs because he was carrying a rather large platter that was weighed down with food to last Arthur from breakfast to dinner. When he finally returned Arthur was out of the tub and in a robe sitting behind his desk going over paper work. He jumped up and went to help but Merlin had already managed to put the tray down.

"Wow I'm impressed" Arthur said.

"What I was never clumsy and that is why it took me so long because I wanted to take my time."

"Who is all this for?" Arthur asked his eyes wide with surprise at the amount of food on the large platter.

"Well the woman in the kitchen seemed to deduce that my return would coincide with your appetite. I certainly didn't ask for all of this she just grabbed the platter and started loading it up. I didn't want to say anything to upset her she seemed very happy to be doing this" Merlin explained.

"You look much better already and you smell much better as well" Merlin added and Arthur chuckled.

"You know you are the only person in all of Camelot that can get away with the stuff you do and say. I hope you're hungry as well because I can't eat all of this" Arthur said motioning for Merlin to join him and to help himself. Merlin ate a little because he wanted Arthur to eat more and when all was said and done, the platter was cleared off and Arthur had eaten most of the food.

"What are you smiling at?" Arthur asked

"For somebody who said they couldn't eat all of that, you sure did a good job" Merlin said with a chuckle.

Merlin got up and started rummaging through Arthur's cabinets to see if he could find something that was clean; it took awhile but eventually found something for him to put on and told him to get dressed.

Merlin stopped and looked at Arthur who was just standing there in his robe holding the clothes that Merlin handed him.

"Is something the matter?"

"There is something, well two things actually, there is something I want to ask you and something I want to tell you but I'm afraid that the question I ask may cause you to lie for fear of how you think I'm going to react to the answer and the thing I want to tell you I'm afraid may cause you to leave again."

Merlin just looked at him a million things running through his head wondering what it was he wanted to ask and what did he want to tell him. He felt his throat go dry while his palms started to get sweaty and his knees felt week so he sat down.

"Um ok" was all he could say in response.

"Two days before Gaius died he asked to speak with me and he confessed everything to me, he wanted to die with a clear conscious and with my forgiveness but I told him there was nothing to forgive, in fact I ended up more depressed because I realized that you left because you were afraid of what I would do or say because you had magic. I want you know right here and now Merlin, I don't care if you have magic and I'm sorry that because of me and my father's belief's."

"Arthur do not beat yourself up about this, yes I have magic, I was born with it and I don't know what happened but I started to lose control, things started to happen without me even trying. I couldn't risk something happening in front of you and leaving was the only option I had, but that was not my only reason for leaving."

Arthur looked at him for a moment "what other reason was there?" he asked and Merlin felt the color drain from his face.

"It was a personal reason, just something I needed to handle myself but it was a very small part of my reason for leaving" Merlin said quickly and then Arthur yawned.

"Am I boring you?" Merlin said as he laughed and Arthur laughed as well.

"No not at all, I just think the warm bath and all the food is hitting me and I haven't had a decent nights sleep in weeks" Arthur said as he tried to stifle another yawn. Merlin got up and took Arthur's hand, "come on go lay down" he said helping Arthur up.

Arthur climbed back into bed, "you won't leave me will you?"

I'll be here until you fall asleep and then I'll see about getting your clothes cleaned.

"Can't you use magic to do that?"

Merlin just looked at him shocked.

"Oh come on Merlin I just told you I haven't been sleeping well, don't you think I would have heard you lugging buckets of water to fill the tub? No more secrets, no more lies Merlin."

"Ok I used magic to fill it, there are you happy?" Merlin said smiling.

"Yes I knew you had used magic the second I saw it was full and it never got cold."

Arthur's eyes became heavy and he leaned over resting his head against Merlin's arm. Merlin smiled but then those old feelings came back and so he remained still hoping Arthur would be out cold quickly and to his relief Arthur soon rolled over the other way and was out. Merlin reached out and gently touched Arthur, running his hand along Arthur's long hair.

He got up slowly so as not to shake the bed and he stood there looking around and figured he had nothing to lose at this point so he went to the tub and with the help of some magic he drained out the bath water and refilled it again making it a bit hotter than before then he just grabbed all of Arthur's dirty clothes and tossed them in and they started cleaning themselves. With a little more magic, and keeping it all hidden behind the divider, he used magic to get his boots and armor cleaned as well.

He gathered up the platter and all the other plates and quietly left the room. There were two different guards outside the door and both of these men knew Merlin and they were both happy to see him come out of the room, if not surprised.

"When did you get back?" the one guard asked.

"Late last night and was in there most of the night waiting for him to wake up."

"Is he going to be ok?" the other guard asked.

"Yes I believe so, he bathed, he ate and he's sleeping again, but not because he is sad, but because he is well fed and feeling better" Merlin explained and they both smiled.

"Meaning no disrespect, but many of us thought that if anybody could give the king a swift kick in his royal backside, it would be you" the one guard said looking around to make sure nobody was listening.

"Yes I think I'm probably the only one that could that and not get my foot cut off for it" Merlin said with a laugh and then headed down to the kitchen.

When he returned to the room Arthur was still sleeping and he was starting to feel a bit tired himself. He looked at Arthur and thought for a moment and then walked over and got on the other side of the bed to rest himself.

A few hours later Merlin opened his eyes and panicked, he was now in the middle of the bed and Arthur had his arm around him and his head on his chest. Just as he was about to try and get up Arthur opened his eyes and looked up to see Merlin.

Merlin braced himself expecting Arthur to start yelling at him but to his surprise his face was grabbed and he felt Arthur's lips on his. He just looked at Arthur in shock and Arthur was just looking at him, a slight smile on his face, just as he was about to say something, Arthur moved until he was laying on top of Merlin and started to kiss him more passionately.

Those old feelings came rushing back full force and he didn't care, he wrapped his arms around Arthur and started kissing him back. At first he didn't think about it but then he remembered that Arthur had nothing on but his robe and he felt Arthur's excitement being pressed against his own member. Arthur started kissing Merlin's chin, down to his neck and eventually made his way to his ear.

"Merlin is it safe to assume that this was your other reason for leaving?"

"Yes Sire" Merlin said as he slid his hands down Arthur's back and rested them on his butt.

"You lied to me though, you said your other reason for leave was a small part and it doesn't seem that small to me" Arthur said and they both started laughing.

"Well your majesty I have to say I never suspected you had such an impressive scepter" Merlin said and they continued to laugh before they started kissing again.

Arthur propped himself up and looked Merlin in the eye "I need you to understand something Merlin. I loved Gwen I really did, but I was not in love with her, I was already in love with you and that is why I fell apart when you left."

"I was in love with you, you were married and I figured nothing would ever happen so it helped me to decide to leave. I'm sorry Arthur that I left the way I did and caused you pain."

"It's all in the past now Merlin lets not dwell on it." Merlin smiled and then looked at the door to the chamber and Arthur heard the lock click and with a wave of his hand all the bed curtains closed.

Arthur turned and look at him "you know, I don't know what it is, but there is something sexy about watching you do magic" Arthur said before taking off his robe and quickly worked to get Merlin's clothes off.