The Flu
By Kushie
I do not own NCIS: I do not own Anthony Dinozzo, L.J. Gibbs or any other team members.
Please understand that some English spellings and types of dialogue differ from the American ones.
Some of us put the letter 'U' in a lot more word endings. I'm sorry if you find this awkward
It's second nature to me. As is putting certain words, in front of the verb, instead of after
This story bears no relation to any of my other stories. It is set in a totally different Universe.
Warning Alternate Universe. Many Characters act out of Canon! Don't like don't read.
Chapter One.
"But Boss," Tony whined. He couldn't believe it. It didn't make sense. "It's just a little pollen allergy."
He tried to wheedle. As he saw his holiday, with the boys, going down the pan. Faster than an express train.
"Tony," Gibbs voice was firm. "This building has filtered air. There is no pollen in here."
"Michelle!" Tony clutched at straws. "That temp, sent up from the Secretarial Pool. It's her perfume. I'm reacting
against that." Gibbs raised his eyes to heaven.
"Tony!" he held onto his, rapidly diminishing, patience. "You don't have an allergy. You have the Flu!"
"Ah! Ah! Achoo! Achoo! Achoo!" Tony sneezed several time. Then he sniffed.
"Blow your nose!" Gibbs thrust a tissue at him. Abby always kept several boxes of the, balm impregnated,
paper hankies, in her lab. She said they were softer on her nose. Tony complied with the directive, then
he took off his special glasses and dabbed his watery eyes. Before again trying to dismiss his condition as nothing.
"It can't be the Flu," he insisted. "The Duckman has given me the Jab." He indicated his left arm. He's stuck
a needle in me. For every disease going, even Tennis Elbow." He looked round from the gurney. "You have,
haven't you? Go on! Tell him! I can't have the Flu."
The elderly M.E. toddled over from a nearby medicine cabinet. He was holding a beaker of water and a couple
of tablets. Tony eyed them. They looked big enough, to choke an elephant. But as he was desperate to get Ducky
on his side. He swallowed them without a murmur, then continued his argument. The good Doctor sighed and gently
patted his knee.
"Yes Tony! I did vaccinate you against the Flu. But even we Doctors know. The injections are, at best, only about
sixty percent effective. It's a preventative, not a guaranteed all round protector. There are always, going to be, some
people. For whom the injections just don't work. Gibbs shot Tony a triumphant leer.
"You've got the Flu! Just Like Tim, Ziva and Abby." Tony pouted. He knew what this meant. He was destined, for
a week's enforced bed rest. Under the watchful eye of Jackson Gibbs. Tim and Abby had been despatched out to
Stillwater two days before. Ziva had followed them, a few hours later. Now that was to be his fate.
So much for a week long Party. It was Spring break. He and three mates had planned, to head down to Florida.
To mingle with some pretty Senior College Co-eds.
"This is Probie's fault!" he groaned. "When I'm better? I am so gonna.."
"Gonna what?" Jethro's voice sharpened. Tony blushed. He hadn't realised, he'd spoken aloud
"Nothing boss!" he said quickly. Gibbs decided to let that matter drop.
"For now!" he thought. To Tony he now said. "You are the last of the team, to succumb Tony. With all of you out
sick. The Director has, had to call in a relief squad. So I'm not going to be needed. Vance has recommended I take
some Vacation time. Which means!" Tony shivered, at the gleam in his boss's eye. "You won't have to fly out to
Pennsylvania by yourself. You can ride home with me." Tony's mood grew even darker. As he contemplated a seven
hour journey with Gibbs. The World's, second, worst driver. Ziva had the dubious honour of being the World's worst.
Once Ducky had finished giving Jethro, a long list of specialist instructions, concerning Tony's treatment. He was ushered,
still coughing and sneezing, out to Gibbs' car. Thankfully! The Elephant sized Aspirin, Ducky had forced him, to gag down,
had eased his headache. But Tony was still griping. Although wisely under his breath. Gibbs was, in his opinion, far to free with his right hand.
They made a necessary stop at Tony's apartment, so he could grab some gear. Vinni his, half cat, objected to being put into
a pet carrier. But Gibbs insisted.
"The last time that blasted thing was in my car? It hacked up a furball, right in my lap, he scowled "Then it insisted on
lying along the Dash for three miles. I couldn't see a thing." At this Tony's mood lifted slightly as he recalled the incident.
"But Boss! It wasn't a real Furball. Just one of Abby's ribbons, he'd swallowed.
"It was wet, slimy and stank!" Gibbs growled. Noting Tony smile. "And just how can a robot, even produce slime? Let
alone the foul smelling gunk, he sprayed all over my pants?"
"Vinni is only partly mechanical," Tony stroked his adored pet/toy. "Don't you remember? What that Airforce, alien, guy
said? He's as much biological, as he is machine." Tony's grin widened and despite the lousy situation, cheeked. "Besides!
Your driving sure improved, when Vinni sat up front." Gibbs scowled and toed him up the backside.
"Watch that sauce boy. You are about to spend the next week at my mercy." Tony grinned at the empty threat. But then he
started coughing. Jethro immediately steered him to a chair and opened the bag of, Throat, Soothing, Lozenges. Ducky had
supplied. As he sucked the pastille, the coughing spasm began to subside. Tony moved the soother around in his mouth
"How is it, even Ducky's sweets taste like Cack?" Jethro raised an eyebrow then gave a sudden grin and countered with.
"How would you know what that tastes like? Sometimes I'm glad I never attended any fancy college. Listening to you and
all the weird, Frat pledges, you had to do." Tony had to give in. He shook his head and smiled. But suppressed the laugh,
that rose in his belly. He didn't want to start coughing again. Five minutes later with the last of Tony's things packed.
They were, almost ready, to embark for Stillwater. Gibbs noticed Tony checked three times, making sure he had his
special Amber topped staff and a dozen necessities for Vinni. The cat was still balking and refusing. To let Gibbs put him in
his travel basket. jthro hissed in pain, and sucked at the scratch on his palm. The cat's steel claws were very sharp. To
avoid any further delay, that would further, irk his boss. Tony begged
"What if I get in the back. Vinni will stay with me there."
"Yes! All right! I was going to suggest you lay down any way. Gibbs conceded
They got underway a few minutes later. Tony lay propped up on a cushion. That was wedged against the far side rear door, behind the driver's seat. Jethro tucked a thick quilt over him, then on the floor in the gap. That separated the front from the rear compartment. He tucked a box of tissues, a bottle of orange juice and Ducky's lozenges. Vinni, saved, from the
torture, of being caged. Curled up on the back window shelf, beside Tony's head.
He closed his eyes. Even with his special glasses and the window shades. The bright spring sunshine made his, sensitive
eyes ache. He sniffed and rubbed his runny nose along, the length of, his sleeve. Jethro tutted and pulled a paper hankie
from the box.
"Blow!" he ordered, holding it against Tony's nose. Blushing, he complied, Jethro discarded the soiled tissue, in a roadside
trash can. Before finally giving a sigh of relief and sliding into the driver's seat. Tony leaned back and shifted his torso downward, until his feet rested against the other door. Then he twisted his head sideways. So it rested on the supporting pillows. Jethro watched him in the rear view mirror, for a few seconds, then satisfied Tony was comfortable. He started the engine. While they were in town, Jethro kept to the speed limit. But! The moment he turned onto the Interstate, he stepped up the speed. Tony lay quiet for the first few miles, but eventually he complained.
"Put the Radio on Boss. This silence is scary."
"Silence is golden Dinozzo!"
"Only if you're dead? Please boss! I'm bored! I can't read, and every time I try to sleep I wake up sneezing." His voice
sounded so woeful and pathetic, that Jethro gave in. But after, only another minute Tony was again whinging.
"Blimey Boss! What sort of Music is this?"
"This Dinozzo, is Folk Music."
"Old Folk's Music more like." Tony spat. "Come on boss! Humour me. I'm sick."
"If you don't quit complaining, I'm more likely to smother you." Gibbs threatened. But he did change the station. To one playing more contemporary tunes. Inwardly loathing, what sounded like a dreadful cacophony to him? But it cheered
Tony up. He actually managed to refrain from moaning again, for a full forty minutes. Jethro counted it as an all time
record. But, knew it couldn't last.
"I'm hungry," the voice whined from the back. "When are we stopping for lunch?"
"Not for another hour!"
"An hour? I'll have starved to death by then."
"No you won't!" Then Tony, who had partially, sat up spotted.
"Look Boss! There's a sign for a Truck Stop."
"Yeah! Stinky Sam's Salmonella Special." Gibbs sailed past the diner, without slowing a micron. Tony thought fast.
"I gotta take a leak!"
"No you haven't!""
"Truly Boss! I gotta go!" Tony pleaded. As he watched the diner receding out of the back window. Jethro sighed
and pulled over. Tony squinted. He could just about see the diner in the distance behind.
"I can't walk all that way. I'm sick. You'll have to turn around." But Jethro just pointed to a bush at the side of the road.
"I'm not going behind a bush," Tony instantly protested. "Please Gibbs It's only half a mile." Jethro again pointed to the bushes. Tony tried blackmail.
"Ducky said I had to keep warm." Gibbs refused to budge.
"You got to go or not?"
"Not!" Tony admitted defeat and slumped back against his pillows.
"That's what I figured," Jethro almost chuckled. He put the car back in gear and the journey resumed. Tony sulked in
the back. Jethro just ignored his grumbles and derogatory mutters.
But! When they finally did pull into a car park, an hour later. Tony was actually glad. Jethro had made him wait. The small town restaurant was clean and bright. Tony eyed the pretty waitress who served them, then forgot her. As he sampled his
food. It was delicious and freshly cooked.
"This is great boss! Really, really great!" Tony enthused, his mouth full of the dreamiest Steak Pie, he'd ever eaten. Jethro grinned and leaned forward.
"Next time remember Gibbs knows best!"
"I will! I will!" Tony nodded his head, as he shovelled a knifeful of creamed, mashed, potato into his mouth. "And use your fork!" Jethro shuddered. "God! Who ever taught you table manners." Tony blushed and picked up the required utensil.
"Sorry! Sort of a left over from Military School. If you didn't clear you plate fast enough, there. Chances were! Someone would spit in your dinner." Gibbs scowled. He'd never approved of boarding schools. That Tony had been forced to
endure such an institution, made his blood boil. A small part of Gibbs still wished. The Minotaur/Unas-monster
had chomped on Dinozzo senior. He squashed down the desire. Choosing instead to savour the, Oh! So! Perfect Coffee,
the restaurant served. He always stopped in the small town When he came home on vacation. Even though it was
off his route and added an extra thirty minutes to his journey. "It's worth it!" He told himself, every time he visited.
They lingered in the cafe for a while. But soon Tony's affliction, coupled with his odd appearance, began to attract nervous stares. Jethro decided! It was time to move on.
The meal had done Tony some good. It had sated his hunger and filled his belly, making him drowsy. He slept for over
two hours. Waking. just as the sun began to set.
"Not far now," Jethro nodded to Tony in his mirror. But at the same noticing his flushed face and sweaty brow.
"Are you sure your Dad isn't going to mind another Sicko, being foisted on him?" Tony's voice had a worried note and rose slightly. Jethro knew it was from anxiety. Having been neglected and pushed aside, by his uncaring father. Tony was
forever worrying, that he wasn't wanted. It was a quirk that bothered Jethro.
"No!" He reassured. "I reckon Dad's going to enjoy having you over, the most."
Tony thought back to Christmas. He remembered how spoilt and loved he'd felt. It was a feeling he often recalled and cherished. Those few days had been the happiest of his life. A sign loomed out of the gathering twilight. It read:-
"Stillwater! 3 Miles." Tony's spirits lifted a little. Although he felt like hell.
"Yeah! I have the flu!" he sneezed and coughed at the same time. Choking, slightly on his own snot. Jethro frowned.
He loved all his NCIS kids. Most people, even Ducky, thought Abby was his favourite.
But secretly! Tony would always hold, that special place, in his heart.
TBC