Author: Cyhirae

Note: I completed Dark Moon back in 2002 and I will not deny I was quite pleased with it then. My two attempts at a sequel later, however, proved failures and eventually I realized why: in the intervening years between the original and my attempts at the sequel, my style had changed quite a bit. And the original Dark Moon no longer makes me as proud as it once did - I read it now and see so many things I should have done differently- and my dirty little secret: fully half of Dark Moon was never put into the story. There are several chapters I wrote, then judged as too long and cut out of the story.

So here we are now- with my attempt at a rewrite of my original Dark Moon. This will likely be far longer and more involved than the original- as I'm now confident in my ability to tackle plotpoints I shied away from back in 01-02. Also, the event line will differ for some things.

For those who never read the original Dark Moon, this story revolves around Golbez, his return to the Blue Planet and the situation he discovers unfolding there.

Disclaimer: FFIV and all characters and locations contained within it are not mine. Only the plot for Dark Moon is. Beware spoilers for the DS version as well as the standard plot; I will use Golbez's real name, for instance. If you don't want to know anything more- I strongly suggest you stop right here.

Further Notes to the new/DS only players: This story, as stated, was written before anything was known of Golbez beyond his ties to Cecil. His real name, appearance and relationship with his parents were among the largest enigmas of the FFIV story throughout all but the latest incarnation. For that reason, this story is utterly AU. I will try to rework elements to include all the revealed details but we'll just have to see how well it fits the original plot to this fic.

--

Departure

The halls of this ancient ship seem endless; I have been here for many years now and still I find new places to go, new things to see...though the joy of these discoveries has long become a thin, worthless thing. No matter how different the location- one thing is forever the same. I am the only one there, and a thin layer of ice coats whatever it is I have found.

The Lunarians stay in their ageless sleep; they need not awaken to be among one another. I can hear them when I sleep as well- a regular choir of voices racing through my dreams as they speak with one another about things both amazing and mundane. Sometimes it isn't so bad just to listen...but always, before long, their attention will turn to me. I am an object of curiosity to them...I share their blood but I am human as well; they ask me questions in hopes of a unique perspective, or just to try to learn more about me...sometimes pleasant, sometimes merely curious...at others, outright rude. The Lunarians are a people like any other- not all are pleased that Klu Ya's halfbreed son and puppet of Zemus is here.

All are doomed to disappointment, however. I can hear them...but I cannot speak with the ease they do to one another. Ironic as it is, I have always found it easier to speak with my mother's people in the way my father's wish to...they are too loud; thundering voices that drown out my quiet attempts to respond. And their reactions when they realize all I can do is 'whisper' to them are as unwelcome as their demanding questions: pity in some cases, disgust in others.

I find myself longing for the blue planet more and more; I am hated, feared and reviled there- I can take that far better than any amount of pity or disgust. I want to scream at them- I am not weak, crippled or pitiable. Zemus may have held my strings, but the power I used to at his behest had been my own, always my own. It may be of the Dark, but it is still mine. They certainly hadn't pitied me in that time.

"I can't stay here..." My words drift through the frozen air, almost as much a whisper as the 'voice' I try to use to speak with my father's people. It is rusty with disuse...who am I going to talk to here?

No...I can't stay here. But where is there to go? There's certainly little enough company to seek- even that odd clan, should I lose enough of my mind to want to inflict their presence on myself, sleeps when the moon is in motion. Should I risk Bahamut's cave then, and hope the dragon does not object to company? I can think of more pleasant ways to kill myself.

"Theodore...why aren't you sleeping?" A voice old but still strong escapes from a passageway a little ways behind me; Fuso Ya, my uncle and the only Lunarian to leave his sleep at any time, steps free of its shadowy confines. He wears his age, greater than any human could hope to achieve, as a mantle of sorts as he nears me, all the wisdom of those years in those eyes and concern in the hand he rests upon my shoulder.

"I just..needed some time away from them." Hardly a lie, but far from the truth as a whole. I look to him and that gentle concern...and something is twisting inside. If I had not been his nephew- would I be seeing such care from him now? Would I even be alive? My brother and I were the only traces of Klu Ya left- I never doubted that for being his reason to allow me to come at all. If I had not been Klu Ya's son...would he have simply killed me?

Of course. Lunarians are as practical as they are intelligent, at times. I have no doubt he would have aided Cecil- and I would have been swept aside like all the others that stood in their way.

"I understand..but you shouldn't-" His words are halted abruptly as I shrug his hand away, eyes widening a bit in surprise as I step firmly out of reach. "Theodore..?"

And to use that name...It feels like it should belong to someone else. I've been Golbez for so many years; Theodore was a boy who could not even use the most basic of White magic...has he anything to do with who I am now? Golbez may have been a name given to me by Zemus...but it was a difficult identity to just let slip away and take up that ragged, ill fitting mantle of 'Theodore'. Neither fit any longer; but 'Golbez' was the shell I knew better.

"It's alright, I know. No one is supposed to be awake right now; the ship isn't really set up to support anything short of a dragon being active." My words are sharper than I'd intended- those lost and bitter thoughts adding acid to my tone. I regret them almost as soon as they leave my mouth... Watching them strike him like an open handed slap, I feel as ashamed as I had angry and indignant only a moment before. "I'll...go then...you don't have to worry."

I start to walk away quickly then, intending to leave him far behind after that childish outburst. However true the possibility itself might be- it's still not the reality. I wasn't doing myself or him any credit or kindness dwelling on such things. Yet, I find I have far from escaped, for all no footsteps have chased me down the hall. I could flee my uncle all I wanted...

Yet I could never flee this place...not its empty, dark halls or frozen air. At least when Fuso Ya was awake, there was someone to share this exile with...But he spent nearly as much time asleep as the others. With the 'moon' in motion, he need not keep the vigiliance he'd had with the blue planet so close. And here I was, more often awake and wandering than sharing that strange sleep; with no other soul in sight.

In time, I find myself wandering back to the chamber that holds the 'bed' the Lunarians use for such things. Fuso Ya's still stood empty; a brief, childish hope rising that perhaps he was still looking for me after I stormed off...reality soon sets in, however, reminding me that he had many responsibilities to see to whenever he does rise from his bed. His discovery of me out and about had simply been a fluke- it was beyond arrogant to think he'd gone looking for me on finding me absent from the Dreaming the Lunarians share. People fell silent in there for years, sometimes, maybe dreaming their own dreams instead of living in that communal one.

I nearly return to it...then simply shove my cloak in, yanking the door shut tightly. With that to show that something was surely in there through the frozen glaze of the chamber door...Fuso Ya would think I had gone back in it as I'd said I would. That done, I quickly depart the room again; going instead to one of the myriad libraries of the place. Seeing that empty chamber waiting for me, like some sort of glass coffin, had set something loose in me.

I had to leave; this was a living death in a way. I could not sleep these years away- not with that Dream reminding me over and over I could not fit among them. Instead I was simply drifting through the ship, little more than a living spectre. Yet seeing that chamber had brought something else to mind in turn...something Fuso Ya himself had told me all those years ago; or perhaps those crystals in the control room had told me themselves. Reflections of the crystals on the world below- or perhaps the other way around?- tied to them to help keep the balance of the moon while it circled the world...

And there were unusual spells within these libraries of the Lunarians, spells far more advanced than the simple black and white magics of the world my mother had come from. Perhaps in them I could yet find an answer to this double exile I found myself in.

And like any obsession; it keeps at me day and night- if such things can be said to exist here. From one library to the next I wander in this place...no longer aimless. That is perhaps the most glorious feeling of all now- to have a goal after drifting along through these dark halls so long. It's almost a disappointment in a way when I at last find the spell I seek- that goal had become my only companion since I had fled the chamber.

Yet excitement is lingering behind it all as well. If I understand the spell correctly...it is not impossible. It will not be easy or pleasant, but it is not impossible. Sympathetic magics, a spell to build a bridge between them...then I would only need cross it. In theory, it was not unlike the most basic principle of the Devil's Road. Perhaps this is the self same spell that had inspired my father to craft such a thing.

Still, there were dangers to the Road; dangers made even more prominent here. That stable creation of Klu Ya drained those who used it...the price for their passage was some of their vitality for a time. It was nothing that could not be recovered from, but it made anyone a victim of it interested in doing nothing so much as napping as soon as they exited that strange pathway.

I would have no steady, pre-made path to use. If simply passing between Baron and Mysidia was so taxing...what would happen when I tried to do this? No matter, it was a risk I would have to take. I couldn't remain in this place. The spell structure is worked out slowly on a bit of paper; when the time comes, I had to make absolutely certain every small symbol was just right, every glyph in place.

Yet it is not the only thing that I write. When my mind grows too weary of equations and patterns, a letter takes up my time instead, between fits of restless sleep. I have not seen my uncle since that meeting...I do not want to see him again. He would somehow know what I am up to, I think, if I gave him the chance to find me. And my resolve would just vanish; I'd let him talk me into staying.

And even so, I have to leave him something to explain. When the last of the spell is deciphered and the letter complete...it's a simple enough matter to slip into the Crystal Chamber and begin the preparations. The letter is carefully tucked into the door; anything within the circle I draw between the crystals will be departing with me. Then the spell is set- a web between all the crystals, depicting balances and conflicts between them...lines left broken to indicate the missing eight of the Blue Planet from the diagram.

The request of the spell is simple: Send me to the place that holds the missing links. It crosses my mind, briefly, the many ways that could be misconstrued; so it is to one of the pale blue crystals I promptly stare as the spell takes hold, willing myself to its mate. I hardly want to arrive in eight seperate pieces, perhaps; or trapped deep underground.

The diagram blazes to life, opening nothing but darkness beneath me that draws me in relentlessly...even as the letter disappears from the door suddenly. It flies open, showing me Fuso Ya standing and shouting at me, paper clutched in his hand...but there's no sound in this strange void I tumble into; and soon no sight, no feeling...I'm simply no where...

And in that dark nothingness, I find my first true sleep in ages.

--

To Be Continued in "Interlude I: The Letter".