Merry Christmas. By the time you recieve this you wouldn't be able to contact me anymore for I would be long gone. I figured I can never give you a proper goodbye. So instead I'm not giving you one at all. I'm going away for some time, because I cannot bear being this close to you and yet so far away. Take care of the chairman, I know he loves you. Like owner like pet. It's time to move on Alexander, and my love for you will eventually take me back to you If I don't leave. You deserve better than me.
Yours Truly Magnus
Alec looked at the paper with disbelief, clenching his fists on the sheets of his bed in Institute, fighting the urge to just hide his face in the pillow and cry.
Finally he just threw the paper away and fell on the bed with a growl, hiding his face in the pillow, but not crying. He was a Shadowhunter after all. Lightwood. He won't cry!
He clenched his teeth and slowly got up, reaching to the pocket of his leather jacket, and grabbing a small key. After all, who was he to refuse Magnus. The High Warlock of Brooklyn,
the love of his life.
He left his room and passing Izzy in the corridor ran downstairs where he noticed Jace sitting on the couch with Clary on his lap. His parabatai opened his mouth to ask something, but Alec was already outside the building, leaving other Shadowhunters confused.
About an hour later he was already in front of the building where Magnus's loft was. This time he had to bit on the inside of his cheek to hold back some kind of pathetic whine. He was sure he was about to cry, but right now he actually couldn't care less.
He typed in the code to enter the block of flats, and then almost ran upstairs, politely greeting every Magnus's neighbour that recognised him.
He stopped in front of so familiar door and clenched his fist on the small key, that dig into his skin, causing a small amout of pain. Alec couldn't feel it. He was used to much worse pain.
After a second of staring at the wooden door absent mindely, he pushed the key into the lock, his hands shaking. He turned it and gently opened the door. Of course light was off, since Magnus was away. He honestly didn't know what he was expecting. Blue eyed sighed and turned on the light.
The pain was almost physical. The place brought up so many memories from the good times.
He clenched his jaw, feeling tears in his eyes, but desperately not wanting to let them run down his cheeks.
Shadowhunter didn't move from the spot, until he heard silent meow coming from the couch.
He looked toward it and smiled weakly when he saw Chairman looking at him with his huge cat blue eyes, looking as sad and miserable as Alec did.
The cat meowed sadly and climbed onto Alec's lap.
"I know... I miss him too" Alec mumbled and scratched behind cat's ears.
Cat purred silently and jumped off of raven haired boy's lap heading to the kitchen.
Young Lightwood reluctantly followed him, assuming that Chairman was just hungry. He gave the cat some food, before walking to the bedroom and turning the light on. Nothing has changed there. Bed was still covered with canary yellow blanket, but there except for the furniture and the bright colors all around the room, there was no indication that High Warlock ever lived here. No pictures, no personal stuff, or anything really.
He swallowed thickly and kicked off his black boots, then slowly climbing on the bed, hiding his face in the pillow and inhaling the faint scent of the Warlock that remained on it.
He couldn't help it anymore. He felt hot tears running down his cheeks and falling on the pillow.
And this was only the beggining. He cried and cried and cried until he had no tears left and he just laid there, whimpering sadly in the room that reminded him of Magnus.
He was slowly falling asleep when he heard purring and felt something warm next to him. He opened his eyes only to see Chairman Meow curled up on the pillow next to him. He stroked cat's back absent mindely. He knew that Magnus never let Chairman in the bedroom, but Magnus wasn't there and... Alec closed his eyes and bit on his lower lip to hold back a small whimper that was forming in the back of his throat.
He fell asleep after what seemed like a few hours, later.
He opened his eyes a few hours later, hearing the noise that his phone was making. He picked it up and answered it. "What?" he asked his voice still rough from sleep. He heard the sigh of relief on the other side. "Alec, where on the Angel are you? You didn't come home we are worried!" He heard Izzy's voice.
"I'm okay Izzy. I had to take care of Chairman Meow and I accidentaly fell asleep" He yawned "I'll be back soon" He mumbled and hung up. He shifted on the bed, and hear Chairman's meow when he accidently pushed him with his hand or leg, doesn't matter. He looked at the cat, now looking at him with bright blue eyes, so similiar to his and Magnus's in the same time.
"I'll have to go home. Do you think you can stay alone for a few hours?" He asked, scratching behind cat's ears and scolding himself in his mind. 'Lightwood, you're really going crazy,
aren't you? Talking to cat. You think he'll answer you?' He snorted and shook his head.
Chairman purred, and just closed his eyes again. Shadowhunter jumped off of the bed, and walked to the kitchen, filling cat's bowl with more food, before leaving the loft, closing the door behind him and heading off to the Institute.
Once he entered the church, he immediately felt someone hit his head. He winced, and turned around.
Isabelle was standing behind him, with an angry look on her face. "What was that? And who's Chairman?" She asked angrily, folding her arms. "Izzy, maybe you'll let him sit and rest for a minute, don't you think it'd be wise?" His parabatai asked, and black haired boy noticed that he was standing on the other side of the corridor. His arms were crossed too, but his expression was rather worried than angry. Clary was just standing next to him, looking at Lightwood, like he didn't know how to behave. "It was an accident. And Chairman Meow is Magnus's cat" Explained Alec walking to the kitchen. He could almost feel how suprised his little sister was. She followed him, throwing his arms up in the air. "Magnus's?!" She asked, even more angry now if that was possible. "Why are you taking care of Bane's cat?" She almost yelled at him.
Blue eyes met the dark ones, and Alexander sighed. "Because he asked me to." He shrugged casually opening the fridge to get something to eat. "Because he... Jace, did you hear that?!
Our Alec is taking care of Magnus's cat, because Bane asked him to. So I guess he can't refuse High Warlock, can he? Especially that their relationship was really great! Especially since this... This Downworlder broke up with him!" Isabelle was yelling now.
He heard Jace and Clary suck in breath. Even they knew that this was one word too much. He clenched his jaw and closed the fridge. "I think I have to go, actually. Don't wait for me.
I don't know when I'll be back" He mumbled, and not looking at any of his friends, he left the Institute again. He heard Jace calling after him, but he was already heading to Warlock's loft again.
About six months passed like this. Izzy apologised to him, but he was still living in his ex-boyfriend's flat. Sleeping in his bedroom with Chairman Meow, feeding the cat and cooking for himself, trying not to cry into the pillow at night. He did it anyways. Every night.
One day he was going back from hunt with Izzy, Jace and Clary, his gear stained with blood.
He opened the door and froze when he saw Magnus Bane sitting on the couch, stroking cat's fur.
He froze in shock. He didn't change at all. His black hair was still in spikes, covered in glitter,
his clothes colorful and his eyes yellow, with pupils cat-like. Shadowhunter should've said something wise and bright, but all he could say in this moment was "You're back". Warlock looked at him and smiled politely, like Alec was just another customer, nobody important. Because after all he wasn't important at all. They broke up. "Yes, I am. Thank you for taking care of Chairman Meow." Magnus said casually. "No problem. Your cat is amazing" He shrugged and unsurely bit on the inside of his cheek. "Oh, since you're back, then I'll just leave it here" He smiled and stepped closer to the couch, then putting the small key on the glass coffee table, before turning around to walk out of the loft. "Alexander" He heard the voice behind him, and he immediately froze in the spot. He glanced over his arm, and noticed that Magnus stood up. "I told you in my letter. My love will take me back to you... Of course if you want me back" The Warlock said, and Alec for the first time in his life saw him shy. He had to hold back a snort. "How do you know I didn't find someone 'better than you'?" He asked. He didn't even know why he said that. Right now he should fall into Magnus's arms and thank Angel that he came back and what more important, wants him back. Bane clearly didn't expect that either. He looked at Lightwood for a second. "If you did, I'll accept that and leave you two" High Warlock said, calmly, but Alec knew him too well. He knew that he was hiding his true emotions. Shadowhunter didn't move, he looked at his feet and bit on his lower lip.
"I missed you" He said after a second of silence, looking up at the Downworlder "I don't think I really deserve any better... Mostly because for me there's no one better. Not for me" He shook his head.
He slowly took a step forward, for a second thinking about their first kiss. He was as embarrassed as he was now. In their relationship Magnus was always stronger, less scared or ashamed. Dominant, you could say. But this time, the Warlock was the one standing there, helpless, not knowing what do to.
And it was time for Alec to do something. He walked to the other man, and climbing on his tiptoes pulled Magnus into the kiss. He could feel that Warlock was surprised, but after a short second of just standing there frozen in shock, he kissed back, and Young Lightwood could feel his every emotion poured into this one kiss. The Warlock pulled back after a second, smile lighting up his face. "Aku cinta kamu" he whispered, and Alec just smiled. "I love you too"
He woke up in the morning sighing with relief when he saw that it wasn't just a dream, and pair of strong arms were wrapped around him, pulling him close to other's warm body. He closed his eyes for the first time in months feeling entirely and undeniably happy.