Summary: "I must," Sasuke replied calmly, standing at parade rest. "It is my duty as a Konoha shinobi, Hokage-sama."
Warnings: a little bit of mindfuck, very unreliable narrator
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto and I do not get money for writing fanfiction.
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The Expendable Ninja
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"Ah, Uchiha-kun," Hokage-sama drawled facetiously, as if his grandfatherly mien had any effect on Sasuke except giving him the creeps. A sickly bittersweet smell wafted from the pipe in his hand. "What brings you to my office today?"
'Today' was the day after Sasuke had passed the farce of a gennin exam that allowed him to finally, after years of pointless delay, graduate the Shinobi Academy.
"I would like…" he took a deep breath, thought of that day and of that man's words, and finished his sentence: "…to make a request."
"Gennin teams are determined according to your class rankings and the recommendations of your teachers, Uchiha-kun."
Hokage-sama didn't quite patronise Sasuke, but his perfect neutrality was a clear enough sign that he had heard far too many childish demands from Academy students regarding their unrealistic ambitions and juvenile crushes.
Sasuke was above that. His request was motivated by loyalty to Konoha rather than foolish self-importance.
"Regardless," he insisted, "an observation."
Hokage-sama lowered the hand holding his pipe and exhaled another cloud of the nauseating smoke. "If you feel you must."
At least the spectre of the Uchiha Clan's status was good for something.
"I must," Sasuke replied calmly, standing at parade rest. "It is my duty as a Konoha shinobi, Hokage-sama."
Sasuke imagined that interest sparked in the old man's eyes. It must have been a mere illusion – a shinobi of his calibre wouldn't have allowed anything to show which he wanted to remain hidden.
"Do not put me on team with people whom you will miss when they're killed."
As soon as the words were out, he was assaulted by an explosion of KI. He sank to one knee, shuddering, attempting to hug himself. Bile rose in his throat.
"Is that a threat, young man?" Hokage-sama inquired mildly, puffing out a tiny white-grey cumulus.
"N-no! No… not from me!" Sasuke pressed out through clenched teeth, looking up. Was it possible that the leader of Konoha did not understand the ramifications of team assignment for someone in a situation like Sasuke's? Surely not! "But there is a man who already killed everyone close to me and repeatedly stated his intention of doing it again – whenever there is a chance I may have a preference for a person, I may as well be signing their death warrant."
The KI had since abated, and Sasuke climbed back up to his feet with as much dignity as he had managed to collect from the floor. "Consider it when you form the teams. Please."
"Itachi?" Hokage-sama spoke in a soft tone, and thoughtfully re-directed his gaze to some unidentifiable point in midair.
Sasuke shivered, and even that he managed to suppress quickly enough.
He had had five years of practice, after all. That man was a monster under his bed and the nightmare that kept him awake at night; the ghost in the darkened corners of the empty district and the phantom of a death sentence carried on the wind – that man was a kunai held a scant distance from Sasuke's jugular.
Sasuke didn't pretend that he wasn't constantly living in terror.
But he was still alive.
For now.
"Until I am strong enough to amuse him through battle, he will continue to amuse himself by killing the people close to me," Sasuke explained. He bowed, deeply. "Do not allow anyone near me whom you may miss, Hokage-sama."
He took the ensuing silence as dismissal, and went home. Tomorrow he would find out what the verdict was.
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When he looked at them, it made a twisted kind of sense.
The top kunoichi? On paper, perhaps. Good memorisation skills, tested well. But she was civilian-born, and without the might of a Clan behind her, her death would not be politically importunate.
And the dead last… Obviously, no one at all in this entire village would miss that eyesore. Some people may even congratulate Itachi.
…Hatake Kakashi, admittedly, came as a surprise. Sasuke would have thought that one of the allegedly elite jounin, with rank fluctuating between A and S, would not be expendable. However, seeing as he had come three hours too late without a semblance of an excuse, did not bother to detect a trivial trap, and dismissed the would-be team out of hand, Sasuke could get behind the idea of allowing the once-legendary ninja his graceful exit of suicide by that man.
"Uchiha Sasuke," he said by way of introduction. "I like nothing and hate most things." That really should have been enough of a warning to anyone vaguely sane with a smidgen of intelligence but, looking at his prospective teammates, he felt the need to add: "I don't have a dream, but I have an ambition. To kill a certain man."
The pink-haired crazy took that as an affirmation of 'his coolness'.
Sasuke, mildly horrified that this level of stupidity wasn't immediately fatal, washed his hands off them.