Counterfactuals

Summary: It's Dick and Tim's game night, and just because they're not at the Manor doesn't mean they're going to miss it.


Notes: Curse you, Big Bang Theory, because I love you so much.

Also, explanations may make no sense, but that is the point of the game. Obviously.


"No way you're getting this one, little bro. No way."

"Just read the situation!"

"Fine." Connor hovered inside the archway to the living room, watching Nightwing and Robin as they sat on couch cushions on either side of the coffee table, sunglasses on, and a pile of cards in the middle of the table.

"You sure? I'll give you a chance to back out; it's a doozy!"

"Dammit, just read it!"

"Fine, fine, don't swear at me, or I'll tell Agent A." Now Connor was even more confused; who was Agent A, and why was swearing a bad thing? They all did it at some point or another during either the missions or downtime… "In a world where the Star Trek series never existed, who would be the president of the United States today?"

Connor couldn't help it; he snorted. The situation was so dumb, there couldn't possibly be-

"Brent Spiner. Obviously." There was silence before Robin went on. Connor could just imagine the skeptical look the current den mother was giving the younger Bat. "Brent Spiner became famous from Star Trek, and when he didn't have that to gain him success as an actor, he took a job where his acting skills would be useful – politics. Within the political world, he was able to put those skills to good use for the betterment of the country, and because he then gained such a well-known name and kept his promises, he was elected president of the United States in 2012."

Nightwing seemed to narrow his eyes, but Connor couldn't see Robin's face. He imagined the younger Bat would look smug, though, especially after Nightwing relented.

"All right, fine. But I want it on record that that is very weak, so half points. Oh, and Kon, you can come in if you like. We don't bite."

Connor jumped, before remembering that this WAS Nightwing he was spying on, so of course he would've been noticed. He stepped into the living room, watching the pseudo-brothers bicker.

"I don't; you do."

"I do not!"

"'Wing, you bit me two days ago."

"Yeah, well, that was a special circumstance."

Robin snorted, and Connor hesitantly took a seat on the last cushion of the couch. "What are you two doing?" he asked, interrupting the fight.

"It's our game night, and we're stuck on duty," Nightwing explained, "so we're playing here instead. This week, the game's called Counterfactuals."

"As seen on Big Bang Theory," Robin added, drawing a card off the pile. "Ooh, 'Wing, here's a good one for you: In a world where elephants are used for all transportation purposes, who would the hero of Blüdhaven be?"

"Oh, come on, this is unfair! I demand a redraw."

"Sorry, you know the rules: Answer, or forfeit 300 points. Lose that many, and you'll never catch up to me. Not that you're going to now, though."

"Fine." Nightwing seemed to be sulking as he answered, "The hero of Blüdhaven would have to be Flash. Since elephants are used for everything, I would end up training them instead of, well, you know." He gave a meaningful look to Connor. "Because of this, I never became a hero, and when the amount of corruption in Blüdhaven reached the ears of the League, they sent Flash in to combat it, because the Haven doesn't have a zeta tube and he can get there fastest."

"Mmm, little light, don't you think? But it's good, so take half points."

Nightwing smirked, drawing a card with a flourish. "All right…Kon." Connor nearly quailed under the look his team leader was giving him. "In a world where Rome never fell, who would be the hero of Metropolis?"

"What's with the questions about heroes all of a sudden?" Connor asked.

Robin shrugged. "Gotta answer, Connor, the price is hefty if you don't. Who would be the hero of Metropolis if Rome didn't fall?"

"Uh…" Connor searched for a name, blurting the first that popped into his head. "Batman!"

Nightwing and Robin looked at each other, then to him as one. "Defend," they said together, sounding eerie.

Connor gulped; he didn't know what to do! "Um, well, if Rome didn't fall-" He started getting into it; history was one thing the Genomorphs drilled him in. "If Rome didn't fall, then they would have continued to conquer, gaining most of Europe and, eventually, the world. We would then have had no dark ages, and very few, if any, successful religious revolutions. Because of this, bats did not get such stigma as they did, and Batman would be free to roam the streets of day as well as night. Now, also because Rome didn't fall, the cities are much, much better than they would be – are, I mean. This makes Gotham City a nice place to live instead of a dump – no offense, of course – and its high concentration of people, compared to that of Metropolis, and high commodity worth would make it much more important to keep safe and clean. Thus, Batman would have no one to fight, and Metropolis, stuck inside the Midwest as it is, would have less worth and, therefore, less criminal patrolling. Batman would then be forced to move to where the criminals are, and because Blüdhaven is a port city and also much more important to Rome, it wouldn't have the corruption and crime it does now. Which makes the city with the most need for a hero Metropolis."

"Are we allowed to give bonus points?" Nightwing asked, and Robin shook his head.

"No, I think we'll have to make a rule about that. Connor, in light of your answer, we have given you a bonus and you just won 100 points," Robin declared.

Connor shook his head, even more confused. "Wait, points? And how, exactly, do you play? This game makes no sense."

"All right, so everyone starts with 100 points, and each answer and defense is worth a total 25 points – five for the answer, twenty for the defense. Half points means twelve. The other player or players determine worth of each defense, between zero, twelve, and twenty as possible amounts. The goal of the game, depending on the time, can be 500, 1000, or whoever has the highest when we stop. For each scenario, you need to give an answer to the question, and then defend if asked."

Connor shook his head. "That…still makes no sense. But whatever."

Nightwing looked ready to jump out of his seat. Or, rather, off it, since he was on the floor. "Now it's your turn to draw for Robin!" he said gleefully. Connor didn't quite understand what he was so happy about, but he picked up a card.

"In a world where all books were burned in the 1980s, what country would be ranked first for teenage pregnancy?"


Yeah, no, no explanation except that I was watching Big Bang Theory before bed. All I own are the situations and their explanations featured in the story, and the point scoring system that I created (because it's not brotherly bonding between Dick and Tim if there isn't a contest involved). If you play Counterfactuals and would like to keep score using this system or use the situations here, feel free; I don't care. All I care about is hoping you enjoyed.

Also, my brother came up with a great answer for the last question (everything is set for our current year, so if you want it changed for the years of the second season, you'll have to update the teen years):

China would be ranked first for teenage pregnancy. China currenly is regulated to one child only, as established in 1979 (geography. about od/ populationgeography/ a/ onechild. htm), and is not even in the top 26 countries for teen pregnancy (www. nationmaster graph/ hea_ tee_ pre- health- teenage- pregnancy). Teenagers would have been born between 1994 and 2000. Now, because all books were burned, school ratings around the world plummeted, until no schools were allowed open. This means that the current teenage population would be illiterate. Because of this, they were unable to know that China was limited to one child only, and (as he put it) they needed something to do with the spare time of no school, so to get off work, they...procreated.

Dead serious, that's what he said. Anyway, mind leaving a review on your way out?