She Looked out of the train window as the sights of Bath came into view. She felt her pulse quicken. She felt closer to him already. She knew she'd see him soon. Be able to touch him, feel him.
Her nerves were battling with the excitement. It had been over three months since she'd seen him at Smurf's funeral. They hadn't had much chance to speak, it had all been too raw. She'd only had chance to tell him about her tour before she'd gone back to Smurf's house with his family. But she knew he supported her decision, that he knew it was important to her, that she wasn't ready to move on and leave Afghanistan behind. No, it wasn't a case of being ready to move on, it was more than that. She couldn't move on, she still felt involved.
She closed her eyes briefly as she reflected on the impact he'd had on her in such a short time. He believed in her, he gave her the confidence to go back, to do what she felt she needed to do. To finish what she'd started. For Bashira, for Qaseem. She'd doubted it at first, but she was gradually beginning to believe that he'd be there for her. Waiting for her. He'd sat in the restaurant and said he wanted her to be brilliant, that he loved her. And although she believed him when he said he was in this for the long haul, it had been hard trying to keep in touch whilst she'd been away. A ten minute call on Skype once a week and a few emails hadn't been enough. It had just been about swapping news, checking on his rehabilitation, telling him how she was getting on training the medics. The changes Afghanistan was going through. They hadn't talked about the future or how they felt.
She needed to see him. God, she really needed to see him. No matter how much she told herself he'd still feel the same, she couldn't help but think about the boyfriends she'd had before and how they'd treated her like shit. She took a deep, steadying breath; he was different, deep down she knew he was.
She hadn't told him she was coming home today. He thought she was due into Brize Norton on Friday. She wanted to surprise him, he was always so self assured, so sure of himself. She loved that about him but just for once, she wanted to catch him off guard. She'd only landed this morning, showered and changed there, before going straight to the station.
So her heart was pounding as she knocked on the door. She suddenly worried that he wouldn't be in. It hadn't crossed her mind that he would be out. She was desperate to see him, could feel the emotion coming to the surface. Please let him be at home.
But then the door opened and he was there in front of her, shock registering on his beautiful face, his eyes widening before his face broke out into a huge smile.
"Missed me?" she quipped.
He grinned. His face was so expressive, his joy at her unannounced arrival clearly evident. She felt the connection deep within her, her nerves disappearing in an instant. He motioned for her to come in, his eyes not leaving her as she ducked under his arm into the hallway. The door swung shut behind her and she turned to face him, expecting his cheeky grin still to be there. But it had gone, replaced by a look of sheer longing that made her catch her breath. The desire was clear, palpable to both of them as they just stared at each other. And then he moved so quickly, it was his turn to take her totally by surprise. His lips were on hers, hard, demanding. She responded immediately, pressing her body into his, opening up to him, instinctively needing to get as close to him as she could. His hands cupped her face for the briefest moment before they were pushing her coat off, pulling her shirt out of her jeans so he could run his hands up her back.
She felt out of control, her hands feverishly finding the hem of his T shirt, lifting it and feeling his skin, his muscles flexing under her fingers. He dragged his mouth from hers. "Jesus, Dawes" he groaned. The rasp in his voice, knowing he was as desperate as she was, so affected by her touch, disarmed her completely. His eyes were wide open, holding hers. It intensified everything, watching him, his loss of control. She wanted him now, all of him. It was so far removed from the last time she was here, the tender night they'd spent together, both nervous, self conscious. This was urgent, charged. The culmination of three months apart, a force so strong between them that there was no holding back. She matched him kiss for kiss, touch for touch. Within seconds, their clothes were on the floor and he pushed her against the wall, lifting her and she wrapped her legs around his waist. She was incapable of speech, but she knew he understood how she felt. She could see he felt exactly the same. Here, now.
Afterwards, they sat on the floor, still wrapped around each other. Now, she couldn't stop talking, he held her close and just listened. She knew he could hear the difference in her voice as she talked about Bashira and the Afghan medics, her new found confidence, the sense of accomplishment she felt at what she'd achieved.
"I'm proud of you, but I never doubted for a second that you'd be amazing" he told her.
She felt tears forming at the back of her eyes, he had no idea how his words affected her. She'd never had this support, someone who had so much faith in her and her abilities.
"It's down to you, Boss" she said simply and she felt him shake his head. "No, Molly, it's you. All you." tightening his hold. She twisted to give him a lingering kiss. "Thank you" she replied. It didn't seem enough but it was all she could say.
"So what now?" he questioned.
"Well, I should probably go home to see my Mum and Dad and the kids. I came straight here. Think I should go and see them".
"I didn't mean literally, I meant about doing another tour. But you mean go to London now? Tonight?" She nodded, glancing at her watch. He got up, pulled her mobile phone out of her bag and passed it to her.
He smirked. "No fucking way. And that's an order, Dawes!" He kissed her. "Phone them and tell them I'll drive you down tomorrow. They'll have to wait out".
She laughed. "Yes, Boss". This was one time she wasn't going to disobey an order.