I wrote this in two days. And all of it was at work, because I'd managed to grab time on the computer! :D Holidays make it easier to BS! Sorry if some of it seems weirdly written, though. I had to work 12 hour midnight shifts on the 23rd into the 24th and the 24th into the 25th, so by 3 AM both nights I got a little wonky in the brain.
I do hope you enjoy this crossover. It's quite the interesting development! xD
I own nothing you recognize as canon in either universe.
*~Santa Claws, Blue Krampus, and a Latino Elf~*
A Heroes of Olympus/X-Men Evolution Crossover Christmas Special
Featuring:
Leo Valdez, Harley, Kurt Wagner, and Logan
"You weren't scared, were you?" Leo prodded his brother as he and Harley snuck back into camp. They'd both just come from a sneaky theatre-run, going to see the new holiday horror, Krampus.
Harley shook his head. "No! That was awesome!" He hopped around in the snow. "Did you see the robot!? I wonder if I could make that work!"
Leo grinned. "You make the robot, I'll make a Krampus automaton. We've got a whole night to get these built and get them moving for Christmas Eve. Think we can do it?"
"I know you can," Harley said. "You're super fast!"
Leo ruffled Harley's hair. "You're fast, too, kiddo. You'll get that robot done in no time, and then we'll scare the pants off of the other campers. I'm pretty sure some of them weren't that good this year."
They headed off to Bunker Nine, excited to build their scary Christmas attack toys.
"Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal…"
"Favorite line, by far," Leo said as he tried opening a mechanical egg he swore had something in it.
Harley kept his eyes on the TV screen, still giving his gingerbread-robot-men the final touches, as he'd already finished the attack robot. Home Alone was playing, keeping the duo entertained in the wee beginning hours of Christmas Eve. Leo had finished his Krampus (life-sized, he might add), along with a creepy Christmas angel, attack teddy, and small rattler Jack-in-the-box. The Jack wouldn't eat anyone, but it still roared loudly and sent chills up Leo's spine.
While searching for parts for the teddy, Leo had come across a mechanical egg. With his technokenesis, he'd, sensed that the egg was hollow and had something inside. Obviously, curiosity required him to open the egg.
Trouble was, he didn't know how, and it was bothering him.
"I like it when he screams in the mirror," Harley said. "And when the tall robber screams like a girl when the spider's on his face!"
Leo burst out into laughter. "Yeah, that part's hilarious!" He fiddled with the egg relentlessly. "Why won't this stupid thing open?"
Harley finally tore his eyes away from the screen. "You could always give it to me. I'll give it a go."
Leo hissed protectively. "I got it! This is personal—between me and the egg. I'll scramble this thing when I'm done!"
"Chiron says some things are locked for a reason."
"And those locked things are in the Big House," Leo stated. "Anything in the Bunker has a right to Leo-pilfering, plain and simple."
Harley rolled his eyes and turned back to Home Alone. After a few more minutes, Leo exclaimed, "I got it!"
He peered inside, shoulders slumping. He groaned, "Dust? Are you kidding? Just blue dust?"
Harley laughed. "That's what you get for forcefully unlocking it!"
Leo put the egg on the table and hopped down to join his brother. He smothered Harley in a bear hug. "Shut up," he grumbled playfully. "At least we got our toys done."
"Yeah, and when we release them tonight..." He paused for a yawn. "Priceless!"
Leo snuggled up to Harley, wrapping them both in a blanket. "It's 2 in the morning. Why don't we get some shut-eye? We still have to set them up, and we have all day to do that."
Harley pouted. "But we still have to watch the Grinch!"
"Fine, we'll watch the Grinch and then go to bed."
They didn't even make it to the halfway point of the Grinch. By the time he'd put on that hat and cloak, Leo and Harley were sprawled out on the floor, wrapped in each other's arms.
Leo's foot kicked out of his blanket, knocking the table nearby. The egg on the table wobbled and spilled, blue dust sprinkling onto the desk.
A sudden stiff wind, one that came from the many air vents of the bunker, picked up and blew the dust off the table. Leo and Harley sneezed as the dust went into their noses.
A deep sleep settled over the sons of Hephaestus. The dust invaded their dreams and transported their minds away into a new type of dreamland...
Leo woke up cold.
He hated the cold.
The son of Hephaestus opened his eyes and sat up. As he stretched his chilled limbs, he realized he was not in Bunker Nine.
He was sitting in the middle of a foyer, possibly inside a mansion. A grand staircase took up most of his vision if he stared straight ahead, but multiple hallways branched off throughout the room, making Leo curious. Harley was curled on the glossy floor, nestled into Leo's side.
Leo shook Harley awake. "Uh, Harley...Dude, wake up."
It took a minute, but the boy finally woke up. When he looked at his surroundings, Harley snapped into a standing position. "Where are we?"
Leo stood up. "I don't know," he said honestly.
The mansion place was dark, cold, and extremely spooky. Leo could see snow falling in a blizzard outside the windows. He doubted the power was on, or if the heater was working.
"Let's find a fireplace," he suggested. "We can warm up and discuss what to do next."
"Okay."
Together, the sons of Hephaestus wandered around the halls, looking for a sitting room. After a couple dead-ends and weird classrooms, they'd found a lounge with a fireplace.
Unfortunately, it seemed the fireplace was occupied.
By what, Leo wasn't sure. He saw a spaded tail writhing around in the fireplace, black as night. Soot showered down, spreading onto the sheet-covered floor. A muffled voice cursed in German, sounding sinister.
Harley, ever the brave soul, stupidly decided to investigate. He peeked upwards into the chimney. His eyes widened and he screamed.
The thing in the chimney yowled in surprise and fell down onto the floor of the fireplace. The room filled up with soot, and Harley burst from the cloud, screaming bloody murder: "IT'S KRAMPUS! KRAMPUS IS COMING TO STEAL OUR SOULS!"
Leo instantly set his hands on fire and started blindly shooting fireballs into the soot cloud. Harley's screams freaked him out and he didn't do or think well when suddenly freaked out.
A screech sounded from the soot cloud, and the sound of air exploding hit Leo's ears. Some sort of rope wrapped around his neck and he was hauled to the ground. He struggled, putting his flaming hands on the rope.
"OW!"
Leo kept up his hold on the rope, not registering the smell of burning fur. The rope was released, but now Leo was openly wrestling with Krampus. He felt three-fingered hands grab his shoulders, and cloven feet kick his legs. The rope returned, and Leo realized it had been a tail!
And suddenly, Leo heard a voice yell out, "Vhy did you attack me!?"
They stopped wrestling. Leo looked into the face and cocked an eyebrow. The face...the face didn't look anything like Krampus's face. Sure, the golden, pupil-less eyes were unsettling, but the face was covered in thin black fur. Leo could feel fur from the arms. It felt like velvet under his hands.
The creature—Leo had an idea it was a 'he' and 'he' was no older than Leo himself—glared angrily at the son of Hephaestus. "Vhy did you attack me," he repeated with a distinct German accent. "I did nothing wrong!"
It was Harley who answered: "We thought you were Krampus..."
The creature boy looked at Harley with a bewildered expression. "Was?" he said in German. "Vhy vould you think I am Krampus!? I look nothing like him!"
Leo coughed as he inhaled soot. "Are you serious? You're pitch black, you've got hooves, three fingers, and a godsforsaken tail! All you're missing are the horns!"
The boy stood up. "I'm blue, first of all." He shook his fur out, revealing indigo-colored fur. "Und I don't have hooves." He held up his foot, which confirmed his were just long, bare human feet with three toes (two on the front and one on the heel) instead of five.
Leo scrambled to his feet. "Well...sorry about that. Honest mistake. That's what we get for watching the Krampus movie before pulling an all-nighter."
The boy tilted his head. "There's a movie about him?"
"Uh, yeah. It came out a few weeks ago."
"Huh..."
Leo held out his hand, now not flaming. "Sorry, really. It didn't help that Harley came at me screaming and freaking me out. I'm Leo Valdez. This is my half-brother, Harley."
The boy smiled, revealing fangs. He took Leo's hand in his three-fingered one. That felt weird. "Kurt Vagner. Spelled vith a 'w', not a 'v', in case you're vondering."
"I could'a made the connection," Leo said with a shrug and a smirk. Something about the name and look tugged at Leo's brain, but before he could think of what it was, a voice boomed in the hall:
"Kurt! What are ya doin' in there!?"
Leo and Harley jumped at the animalistic yell. Leo saw a short, but stocky man prowl into the room. He wore a dark sweater and sweatpants, and his hair was styled with two spikes, one on either side of his head...
Harley stepped forward. Because, as said before, he's the brave one of the two at the moment, which Leo wasn't sure he was too happy about. "You look like Wolverine," Harley said.
Leo blinked. The kid was right! This guy looked eerily like the X-Men comics' most coveted character, Wolverine!
The man snorted. "Yeah? And how do you know?"
Leo took a chance. He tossed a small fireball in the man's direction. The man reacted quickly, deflecting the ball of flames with three knives...no, those were actual claws!
Harley beamed. "No way! You're actually Wolverine! That's so cool!"
Something in Leo's brain clicked. If this was the Wolverine...Leo glanced at the devilish boy in front of him and dared to ask, "If he's...does that make you Nightcrawler?"
Kurt nodded. "Ja."
Harley bounced up and down excitedly. "Omigosh, omigosh, omigosh! They're the X-Men! This is so cool, Leo!"
Wolverine sniffed, growling, "Funny. Yer actin' like you didn't know who we were, yet yer caught trespassin' inside the Institute."
Leo held up his hands. "Yo, I had zero clue where we were. We legit just woke up in your foyer with no explanation!"
The Wolverine growled low in his throat. "And you decided to attack the elf outta nowhere?"
"Logan," came a calming voice. "There is no malice in his words. The boy made an honest mistake."
Professor Xavier (for Leo knew no other X-Men bald guy in a wheelchair) wheeled into the soot-covered room. He smiled warmly at Leo and held his hand out. "I apologize for Logan's behavior. We weren't expecting anyone to be in the mansion at this time of night. I'm Professor Charles Xavier."
Leo shook the Professor's hand. "Leo Valdez. That's my brother, Harley." He scratched his neck. "We, uh, weren't expecting to be here, either."
"I'd offer you a warm place to sit," Xavier said. "But I'm afraid our power went out suddenly. Kurt, here, was trying to get a fire going for those of us still in the mansion for the holidays."
Kurt's tail twitched, and he sneezed. Soot flew everywhere. "The chimney vas stuffed vith soot, so I tried to clean it out before getting the fire started." He glanced at Harley. "That's vhen I got ten years of my life scared out of me."
Harley looked ashamed. "Sorry about that."
Kurt smiled and ruffled Harley's hair. "It is okay. I'm used to it. Though I've never really had anybody call me Krampus before." He turned thoughtful, then his features became impish. "Now that's an idea..."
Leo grinned, his own impish smile sparkling. "I do believe you and I will be getting along quite well." He turned toward the fireplace. "Think you got all the soot out?"
Kurt chuckled. "My fur got most of it. The furniture seems to have gotten the rest. It should be clear up there."
Leo nodded and shot a fireball at the broken logs in the fireplace.
Leo decided to just tell the X-Men guys he and Harley were mutants. The whole demigod concept—as much as they might have accepted it with their own versions of Norse gods running around—was just a giant headache to explain. Leo didn't even know if Hephaestus had jurisdiction in whatever world this was.
Leo also didn't think Xavier reading his mind was a problem, since his ADHD prevented thoughts from staying in his mind for longer than a second. Pretending to be a mutant was honestly pretty easy. Leo didn't even have to think about it as he lied.
They were all curled around the fireplace, with Leo and Harley closest to the fire. Currently, only Nightcrawler, Wolverine, Professor X, Beast, and a few young orphan mutant students were in the mansion for the holidays. The older mutants had all gone to their families or friends' places. Kurt had opted to stay, since travel was extremely expensive this time of year. He would take Spring Break off to visit family instead. Leo didn't recognize any of the young mutants, so he kinda ignored them. Harley had a blast conversing with them, though.
"What kind of powers do you have, Harley?" asked one of them.
"I'm a technopath," Harley answered simply. "I can manipulate technology and smithing materials to do or make anything I want. Leo has that power, too, but he's way more intense with his. He built a flying Greek warship in six months!"
Beast looked impressed. "It takes much longer to build a ship. But to make it fly? Might I inquire as to how you did that?"
Leo scratched his neck sheepishly. "Trust me, it wasn't easy. There's a lot of mechanics and magic involved. Gotta have just the right amount of both to get the thing going, not to mention power the oars, ballistae, figurehead, plumbing, training room, stable doors, sails, control panels, dining room screens—"
"They get it, Leo," Harley interrupted. "I think their jaws disconnected."
Xavier, who had left for a few minutes, came back with hot chocolates sitting on a tray. "Children," he called. "Does anyone want some?"
Everyone took a cup, humming in pleasure at the warmth it provided. Leo didn't blow on his, downing half the cup in seconds.
Kurt cocked an eyebrow. "Doesn't that hurt?"
"I'm fireproof," Leo answered. "Which also means I don't get a burnt tongue by a measly drink."
Charles looked at Beast and Wolverine. "I'm afraid we have some unwanted guests," he said softly. "Teenagers are on the grounds, and I believe they mean to vandalize the area while our systems are down."
Wolverine grinned wolfishly and unsheathed his claws. "Great. I was hopin' to do somethin' other than babysittin'."
Leo held up a hand. "Wait. You're not gonna cut them up or anything, are you?"
"'Course not," Logan said. "But a good scare and a demonstration never hurt."
"Well, it's Christmas Eve, isn't it?"
"Yes," Beast said. "What does that have to do with the vandals?"
Leo shrugged. "I just thought that you should use the holiday to your advantage when you scare these guys."
Xavier folded his hands on his lap. "What would you have in mind, Mr. Valdez?"
Leo's smirk was terrifying in the firelight. "It's something that'll stop their bad behavior for a long while, and not just towards mutants. Unfortunately..." He glanced at Logan. "Wolverine might not like what I have in mind."
Leo was thankful he was a fire user, or else the blizzard-like conditions might have actually made him worry. Thanks to his heat, the snow melted around him, almost creating a halo/bubble effect, which only added to the fun of the situation.
He was decked out in a full elf's costume, commandeered from the attic of the mansion, where Xavier kept a multitude of costumes for some strange reason, complete with tights and bell shoes. His usually pointy ears made his costume way more believable. His tights were red and white, and his tunic and shoes were green. A green, jingly bell hat was nestled in his curls.
The downside to his costume was that he had the most enormous wedgie ever, but he had to stick it through and not think about it. It was show time!
He easily found the teens trying to vandalize the mansion. Dress in heavy winter gear, they were already starting to shake up their spray paint, aiming for the wall.
Before one could start spraying, Leo called out, "Hey, there, kids!" (It felt awkward to call people his age or older 'kids' but it was all for the cause.) "What are you doing out here in the snow on Christmas Eve? Don't you know boys and girls should be in bed by now?"
One of the teens scoffed when they caught sight of Leo. "What are you supposed to be? One of Santa's elves?"
Leo bowed in a flourish. "Guilty as charged. And you three are being very naughty, aren't you?"
The second teen held out a crowbar. "What's it to you, shrimp? You gonna tell Santa on us? Piss off."
Leo gasped dramatically. "Oh dear! You said a very bad word—and on Christmas, to boot! The head honchos won't like that, you know."
"Honchos?" Inquired the smallest of the vandals. Leo judged this guy to be the youngest and easiest to scar for life. "As in...more than one Santa?"
The first teen hit the young one. "Shut up. There's no such thing as Santa, dimwit."
Leo clucked his tongue. "Tsk, tsk, my child. How dare you say such blasphemy? And right when he's nearby?"
Leo pointed up to the roof of the mansion. The teens followed the direction and froze. A large figure thumped on the roof with a bag over its shoulder. The snow was just thick enough to keep the figure unrecognizable.
Though the implications of what Leo had said made the teens connect some dots. Their eyes widened, and one of them took a step back.
Leo smiled. "Oh, and to answer your previous question: Yes, there are two big guys. One's Santa, of course. He brings gifts to all the good boys and girls. The other isn't quite so jolly, I'm afraid. His name is Krampus. And he punishes the bad children—children much like yourselves."
They looked ready to argue. However, before any could argue, a huge explosion of air resounded and sulfur filled everyone's noses. The guy with the crowbar suddenly screamed like a girl. His scream cut off as he disappeared in a puff of smoke. He reappeared three feet above the ground a few seconds later. He fell like a stone and scrambled away, running for his life as soon as he found his footing.
"Hey!" called the leader with the spray paint. "Get back here! What happened?"
A thud announced the presence of someone heavy. To Leo's left, Santa had landed. His red outfit was a stark contrast to the white snow surrounding him, but the beard blended perfectly, almost if snow had decided to grow on his face and not land there. His eyes glinted dangerously through the storm.
And then a second person arrived in an explosion of sulfur and smoke. It was a hooded figure with two very large horns protruding from under its hood. Glowing yellow eyes pierced through the shadows of the hood, and a lashing devil's tail peeked out from under the figure's robe. Chains adorned this figure, but not in a binding way. He held them, rattling them and making extremely spooky sounds.
"Naughty children," Leo greeted. "Meet Santa and Krampus. And I'm their little elf helper for the night. By the way, did you know there's a few common misconceptions about us? Like, for example, elves aren't short little things that only build toys. And Santa's name has been misspelled for years. His name is C-L-A-W-S, not C-L-A-U-S."
To prove why, Santa balled his hand into a fist. Three extremely sharp claws popped out from his wrist.
Krampus's chains jangled again.
Leo grinned evilly. "And here's an unknown fact: Elves from the North Pole love playing with fire!"
He lit his arm on fire and pointed to the two remaining teens. "You'd better watch out, naughty children! It's not too late to go back to bed before Christmas Eve is over! Because if you're caught awake and doing naughty things, you'll be dragged to the underworld..."
Krampus stomped once and roared. It was so loud and animalistic that even Leo felt goosebumps. The teens screamed and ran, dropping their spray paint and vandalizing tools. When they had left the grounds for good, Krampus pulled down his hood and Santa removed his beard.
Kurt laughed hysterically, doubling over. "That vas so much fun! They vere so scared and ve didn't do anything!"
Leo puffed out his chest. "That's because you let me do the talking! I told you that would scare the pants off of them!"
Logan released the pillow under his red top. "I'll admit that wasn't too bad, kid."
"And you thought I'd make you say 'Ho Ho Ho'," Leo teased. "Like I'd make big, bad Wolverine a completely jolly-old fat man!"
Kurt chuckled. "I vould love to see that!"
"Dream on, Elf," Logan growled. "If you tell anyone I said anything jolly while in costume, I'll cut off that tail!"
When Leo, Kurt, and Logan came back inside, they were informed that Harley was helping fix the power. Leo didn't worry about his brother when machines were involved, so he let Harley work alone.
One hour later, the power was back on and the heat came back in full-blast. Everyone in the mansion had a midnight snack from the kitchen and went to their rooms after some fun stories.
Xavier had offered Harley and Leo a shared room, and they took it gratefully. Kurt showed them there, and made plans with Leo for some future pranks. Leo was excited to try pranking after the holidays, especially with Nightcrawler.
Harley went to sleep as soon as he hit the bed. Leo curled up next to him, realizing he felt just as tired. The moment he closed his eyes he went under.
Leo woke up next to Harley, but not on a bed. The sons of Hephaestus were once again curled up on the floor of Bunker Nine. The TV in front of them played static.
Harley lifted his head. "Where are we?" he mumbled.
"In the Bunker," Leo said. "You won't believe the dream I had."
"I had one, too!" Harley smiled as he exclaimed, "I dreamed we met the X-Men! And Wolverine had to dress up as Santa!"
Leo blinked, confused. Could they have had the same dream? Leo smiled. "Aw man, I wish my dream was as cool as yours. Y'know, I'm already forgetting mine yours was so cool!"
He ruffled Harley's hair. "C'mon. We need to get up. It's time to set up our Krampus prank!"
Harley jumped up and bounded away to collect the attack toys. Leo stood up, about to gather up his Krampus automaton. The egg from the previous night caught his eye. The blue dust was spilled and some had landed where he and his brother had been sleeping.
Leo shrugged. If the dust made him and Harley have that amazing dream simultaneously with no side effects, who was he to complain? He'd worry about what it specifically was later.
For now, he had a prank to set up, hoping it would be just as great as his Santa Claws and Blue Krampus dream.
A/N: Krampus is by far my favorite part of the Christmas legend. Had I known about him as a kid, I would probably have been even better as a child. Seriously, that's pretty scary, and I'm glad his story is coming back to the light. We need this in society. Look up his legend if you'd like to know more.
The movie Krampus, by the way, is my second favorite Holiday horror. Gremlins holds the first place title, but Krampus is really close second. It's this generation's Gremlins, hands-down! It's amazing!
Yes, I did just combine X-Men Evolution and Heroes of Olympus. Thanks to FuzzyElf24 for suggesting I do a crossover!
And Logan as Santa just popped into my head randomly. You're welcome for that fun visual!
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, everyone!
