Bright dawn light flickered through the round beech leaves, casting dappled shadows on the forest floor. The stream hummed in the distance, setting a peaceful tone to the Mistclan territory. A small mew piped from the nursery; "Mommy! I want to play!" A fuzzy grey tom-kit pounced around the nursery, crashing into the fern.
"Keep it down, Cloudkit!" A tired voice growled from behind him. A pale red tom stood up and stretched out his front paws. "You're mother is sick and trying to sleep." His voice seemed to get softer as he looked down sympathetically at the queen. Starblaze, the medicine cat had spent the night in the nursery to watch over Cloudkit's mother, Thrushtail. "I know it's hard to be cooped up in here all the time, but you need to protect your mother, okay? Be a warrior for her and make sure she's safe." Starblaze smiled hollowly at the kit and padded back to his den.
"Starblaze... I don't want to be a warrior... I just want her to be better." Cloudkit whined smally. Starblaze sighed and turned around to face the lone kit. Starblaze knew it must have been hard for the kit, the only surviving kit from his litter of four. Thrushtail had the mysterious sickness that killed Hollykit, Wolfkit, and Clawkit.
"Cloudkit, she'll be fine." He lied. "She knows that she needs to be here for you." Starblaze watched the kit's tail droop.
"You're lying." He spit in a whisper. Cloudkit looked up at the medicine cat with a sudden, confused rage.
"How could you know? You're only six moons older than I am! Just because Foxjingle died doesn't mean you can let my whole kin die!" The kit's fur fluffed out and he unsheathed his claws. Starblaze stifled a cry and took a breath. He and his mentor had been close, he was the only fatherly figure in Starblaze's life. He blamed himself for Foxjingle's death because he didn't know what herbs to use to cure him. He turned around, stiff with sorrow, toward his empty den where he could mourn his mentor's early death in peace.
"Coward! I'm ready to fight for my kin! You are just a scared kit!"
"Close your loud fish mouth! You have no idea what you're talking about and you never will! Go back to the nursery where you belong, kit!" The pale medicine cat yowled so loudly warriors and apprentices started to peer out of their dens with curiosity. Starblaze felt a tear roll down his cheek that seemed to sting with embarrassment. "What?" He challenged the now very large audience "Go back to sleep! This is none of your concern!" He could only see blurs of cats through his tears, but he knew they were flocking towards Cloudkit to comfort him. 'What if I need comfort? I don't know what I'm doing, Cloudkit is right, I am just a kit.' Starblaze let his tail droop as he padded back to his lonely den.
"You left me." He whispered as he stared at Starpool. He lapped at the reflecting water and drifted into a sad sleep.
"Starblaze..." A mew woke him from his sorrowful trance. "I-I'm sorry..." Cloudkit stepped inside letting his ears lie flat and his tail droop.
Starblaze didn't want to forgive him, he didn't want to apologize. He had dreamt of Foxjingle who had told him that Starclan had a cure for Thrushtail."No harm, kit, this time I am sure your mother will be fine," The pale tom smiled with a new certainty, refusing to think about the kit, "Foxjingle has spoken to me about a cure. She'll live and you will get to show her how brave you are."
"Really?" Cloudkit's excited mew echoed off the bracken and stone. "Thank you, Starblaze! And thank you, Foxjingle!" He looked up and said a silent prayer. Starblaze nodded and smiled at the white kit. Cloudkit jumped up and bolted out of the medicine clearing to share the good news. 'Maybe this kit isn't so bad. I remember lashing out when Foxjingle died." He thought back to the terrible things he did to other cats. 'I think we could even be friends.' Starblaze thought back to his mentor.
"Thank you, Foxjingle." He whispered lightly to his mentor "It seems you'll still be teaching me, after all."
After several moons Cloudkit, now Cloudpaw, had been apprenticed and Thrushtail had returned to the warriors den. Swallowstar had appointed Adderjaw to mentor Cloudpaw, who had proven to be a handful. Starblaze and Cloudpaw had grown to become great friends, like kin. To Starblaze there was always something bothering him when he was around Cloudpaw, he couldn't place his paws on it for the longest time. He finally did when the loners invaded.
"But, if you do it like this," The pale apprentice wiggle out from underneath Adderjaw quickly and pounced on his side knocking the warrior over, "The enemy is sure to go down." Adderjaw purred with amusement at his apprentice's enthusiasm.
"Alright, very good. We'll have to teach that to everyone." He nodded toward the fresh kill pile, "Go eat, you've earned it." The apprentice barreled down the slope towards the fresh kill pile and chucked a mouse at an unsuspecting Starblaze.
"Huh?" The medicine cat looked up and let out a small purr when he saw his friend. "Cloudpaw! You've created a new battle strategy, attacking cats with prey!" Starblaze stood up and grabbed the projectile mouse. He padded lightly to sit next to Cloudpaw.
"No, I'm afraid that would do more damage than good, mouse-brain." Cloudpaw teased Starblaze. "I did make a battle move today. It's sort of a play off of the 'play dead' trick." He purred at his accomplishment.
Starblaze's eyes lit up with excitement. "Show me!" He demanded with mock force.
"Don't eat me!" Cloudpaw whimpered playfully. "Here jump and me and pin me down, okay?" The apprentice turned his head, pretending to be busy. Starblaze smiled deviously. He raised his hackles and pounced on the larger apprentice.
"Gotcha..." He looked down at the apprentice noticing his golden eyes glazed over like a she-cat following a new deputy. The medicine cat became entranced in the apprentice's eyes. A sudden reality struck him in a terrible wave of fear and denial. He jumped off before Cloudpaw could move. Starblaze stood with his fur fluffed, noticing he was being conspicuous, he sat to smooth his chest fur. "Never mind... I don't fight anyway..." He looked at his ginger paws.
Starblaze couldn't help but notice the shock and sorrow in Cloudpaw's eyes. "But, you asked..." The snowy colored tom bit back a whimper.
"I have ...stuff ...to do..." Starblaze lied awkwardly and ran back to the medicine clearing. He sat staring at the feverfew, confused as to what just happened between him and Cloudpaw. "No." He whispered to himself to hush his thoughts of love. He laid down and rest his head on his paws. Starblaze stared at his reflection for what seemed like ages before drifting into Starclan.
"Starblaze. Why are you fighting yourself?" Foxjingle hissed in the young tom's ear.
"Because, nothing happened. Stop making a big deal out of it.. I left because... My stomach hurt. That's all." Starblaze snapped back bitterly. "Why are you even talking to me, I'm trying to have a nice peaceful dream I was dreaming about Clou... hunting until you came along, you old badger." Starblaze looked down to his paws as the starry cat came into view.
"You know, I can see your dreams." Foxjingle let out a mrrow of laughter.
"Shut up." Starblaze hissed playfully, happier now he could see his old friend. "But, it was nothing. I doubt he feels the same anyway. Wait... Why are you supporting this? This break almost three rules in the Warrior Code." The ginger tom met his old mentor's gaze.
"I think it'll be good for the clan to see something different. You are all so used to life whenever something unusual happens you don't know what to do." The black and ginger tom let out a sigh, "Listen to your heart, okay?" Foxjingle smiled and started to fade. Starblaze reluctantly watched his mentor go.
"Starblaze?" Cloudpaw's mew woke Starblaze. "Starblaze. I'm sorry, I should have known better than to teach a medicine cat a warrior's move. Did I offend you?" The pale cat stood in front of the medicine tom.
"No. No, I left because... You know I left because my stomach hurt. I just felt a sudden fit of nausea. "He lied crisply.
"Oh..." Cloudpaw glanced at his feet. 'Was that disappointment?' Starblaze thought cheerfully. "Well do you feel better now? Because Swallowstar finally decided to attack the loner living at the Great Hollow and we kind of need you."
Starblaze offered a confused smile, wondering how long he was sleeping."Yeah, okay!" Starblaze chirped happily and padded out of the clearing behind Cloudpaw. 'Who cares about the blood and carnage this causes, Cloudpaw is there.' Warriors and apprentices were lined up in the camp ready to fight. "I'm here." Starblaze reluctantly left Cloudpaw's side to report to Swallowstar.
"Thank you. Were you sharing tongues with Starclan?" She asked curiously.
"You could say that. Really, just Foxjingle giving me personal advice, herbs and such. You understand?" The tom smiled gently, but not too gently as if to say ; 'I have somewhere to be so make this quick?'
"Alright, then. Pick an apprentice to aide you, and we'll set off." She padded to the front of the group with the senior warriors. Starblaze pondered his decision for a moment. 'I want to take Cloudpaw, but he should be able to show off his strong muscles... and graceful skill...'
He trailed off in his thoughts and found himself blurting out "Brindlepaw." He called the youngest she-apprentice.
She sighed unenthusiastically but padded over to Starblaze. "Hi." She muttered. Starblaze glanced over at Cloudpaw and saw him nod in appreciation. 'No; thank you.' He thought.
"Come on." Starblaze flicked his tail towards the apprentice. He padded slowly toward the younger cats. "Good luck, I know you can shred them without any effort." Starblaze smiled at Cloudpaw with confidence.
"I know, but if I get hurt I couldn't think of anyone better to take care of me." The white tom purred gratefully.
"Warriors! To me!" Swallowstar commanded her army out of the camp.
"Bye..." Cloudpaw smiled halfly. Starblaze fell behind with Brindlepaw.
"Are you kin?" The small apprentice peeped. Starblaze looked at her confused for a moment, not understanding. "You and Cloudpaw, I mean."
"No. Why would you think that?" Starblaze walked swiftly not letting go of Brindlepaw's gaze.
"You two are awfully close, is all." She shrugged and bolted ahead of him. 'Is it that obvious?' He slowed down until he was last in the stream of cats.
Screams and yowls filled the cavern. Starblaze hadn't had anything to do since the battle started. He was walking around the battle, keeping a close eye on Cloudpaw. He had defeated three loners so far and helped defeat another six. He sat down in a sunny spot and enjoyed the warmth. He watched Cloudpaw's muscles ripple as he scratched at a rouge she-cat.
"Laying down on the job, filthy clan cat?" A voice behind Starblaze made him whip around.
"Who are you?" He stood up claws unsheathed and fur bristling.
"Your clan's death." Several new cats appeared behind the loner.
"New wave!" Starblaze bolted frantically to Swallowstar, the loners following. "New wave!" He panted.
"Good job, Starblaze." She purred at him for a moment then headed in the new loners' direction. "Senior warriors," She called boldly, "Attack the new cats!" A group of large, well built warriors launched themselves at the new threats.
'Good job.' Starblaze purred to himself proudly.
"Rat." The same voice hissed so close to Starblaze's ear he could feel the stranger's heart beating.
"I don't suppose you care I am a medicine cat..." Starblaze winced.
"Not at all." The loner threw himself on top of the medicine cat and bit down into his neck. Starblaze let out a screech of terror and wriggled underneath the tom.
"Starblaze!" Cloudpaw's frantic mew caught the loner's attention. He bit down hard into Starblaze's scruff and threw him to the side. His head and shoulders hid the cavern wall. Cloudpaw launched himself with all fury of hell at the loner.
"Don't you dare put your filthy carrion paws on him!" Cloudpaw barreled the loner over and scraped hard at his belly. The loner whimpered for mercy writhing in agony underneath the large tom. Cloudpaw bit down hard on the mangy cat's throat.
"Enough Cloudpaw..." Starblaze managed to mewl through a mouthful of blood, "Warriors don't kill to win." The pale ginger tom smiled and collapsed.
"Retreat!" The leader of the vicious band of loners stood up shakily and awkwardly ran. They scrambled their way out of the cavern and off of Mistclan territory.
"Oh dear Starclan, Starblaze? Are you okay? Starblaze, no, you can't do this, not now. I need you." Cloudpaw's mew numbed the pain in Starblaze's neck.
"I'm not going to leave you... Just get me to camp, all I need to do is sleep." He closed his eyes purring, thinking about what Cloudpaw had said.
His eyes were all he dreamt about until; "Foxjingle! I was happy dreaming about other things." Starblaze hissed as his mentor came into view.
Foxjingle's face lit up with a smug smile of 'You were wrong and I was right.'"He does NOT feel the same way AT ALL!" Foxjingle purred with amusement at his own joke.
"Shut up! I know he does but I don't feel right. Are you sure it's okay? If we show up at the gathering together, no cloudy moon?"
"I promise, as long as you resign from being medicine cat because, well, that is against the code."
Starblaze sighed, he knew it would be hard but he wanted so badly to be with Cloudpaw.
After three days Starblaze was getting tired of lounging about in the too bright, too cheerful Starclan forest with his old mentor. Who had nothing better to do than torment him about his latest fascination.
"Well I think it's time for you to wake up ,because, do you hear that?" Foxjingle paused and there was a loud chant coming seemingly from below them 'Cloudwhisp! Cloudwhisp!'
Starblaze shot up with his eyes wide. "I've missed it!" He said with sudden dismay.
"Then wake up!" Foxjingle pushed Starblaze over, "Oh, and one more thing; Follow your heart."
Foxjingle's words seemed to float around the medicine hollow as Starblaze woke up. He felt his shoulders and neck to find they were healing nicely. He remembered Cloudwhisp's ceremony and shot up.
The sunlight hit his eyes and it took a moment for Starblaze to adjust. He looked around the clearing his eyes rested on a sleek white tom. He slinked up behind the new warrior; "Congratulations." He whispered to Cloudwhisp's surprise.
"Starblaze!" He burst through the group of warriors congratulating him. "Are you okay? I was so worried! You were asleep for almost four days! I have so much to share, and you look amazing.. Compared to what you looked like before, not that you looked bad..."
"Shut up. You ramble too much, Cloudpaw." Starblaze teased and suddenly found himself resting his chin on Cloudwhisp's broad shoulders.
Cloudwhisp's muscles tensed, but he gave in and let out a strong purr. "Do you feel better? I did what you told me to... I gave you two poppy seeds and put cobwebs on the wounds. I wanted to kill that loner so badly... I thought he had killed you." The warrior whined smally.
"Well here I am." Starblaze stood back and puffed out his chest.
"You look better than ever." Cloudwhisp smiled awkwardly studying Starblaze's paws.
Starblaze let out a sigh of discomfort; "We have to talk, Cloudwhisp." The white tom looked puzzled for a moment then nodded.
"I know." He whispered. The two toms padded out of the bramble tunnel into the forest.
Several moons passed and Starblaze's relationship with Cloudwhisp grew strong enough that they could show themselves together in public. Some cats showed disapproval at gatherings when they sat so closely, but they weren't obvious enough to be accused or confronted... by another clan warrior.
"Starblaze, you gonna eat that?" Cloudwhisp nodded towards the mouse next to the medicine cat, the two toms were lolling about in the sun lazily.
Before Starblaze could reply, Swallowstar stepped in between them. "I need to speak with you two." She said in a low whisper. The toms gave each other worried looks and walked with their flanks pressed against each other.
"What if she banishes us..." Starblaze whined.
"Then at least we'd be together." Cloudwhisp tensed his muscles and walked proudly into Swallowstar's den with his head and tail held high.
"You two are causing problems in my clan!" Starblaze tried to hide in his own fur when Swallowstar spat at him and Cloudwhisp. "You two are like two moony she-kits! What do other cats think at gatherings when they saw two toms. Worse! A medicine cat! What were..."
Cloudwhisp boldly interrupted; "Frankly, I don't give a rat's hind leg what the other clans think. As to 'what we were thinking'; we are in love and not even Starclan can stop us. Let's see at the next gathering, if Starclan disapproves. We can even keep it to ourselves if it keeps your mountainous ego together!" Swallowstar reared in anger at Cloudwhisp's remark.
"Fine! But you are no longer our medicine cat, Starblaze! You are a disgrace, the both of you!" The dark grey she-cat hissed in the pale ginger tom's sobbing face.
"But that's all I know!" He wailed helplessly. He pressed his nose into Cloudwhisp's fur.
"Who will replace him?" Cloudwhisp demanded indignantly. "No one in this clan knows herbs better than Starblaze, and you know it. The only thing Starclan frowns upon on this day is your lack of leadership skills!"
Swallowstar yowled in outrage; "Get out of my camp! Get out of my clan! You two are more trouble than you are worth!" Swallowstar unsheathed her claws.
"Okay..." Starblaze nudged Cloudwhisp, who was also readying for battle. "Come on, remember what you said..." He whispered mousily. As the two toms walked out of the leaders den with their tails drooping cats rushed up to them with questions.
"Why is she making you leave?" Briarkit looked up with innocent eyes. Starblaze broke into sobs again and was instantly comforted by Cloudwhisp, Thrushpelt, and Dapplecrown.
"Because, young one, she doesn't like whom we are. Remember this if nothing else; be who you are and don't take dung from anyone." Cloudwhisp bent down and nuzzled the she-kit.
"I think it's just wrong. We've never thrown anyone out of a clan for the way they're born, especially not for who they love. We accepted No-eyes, and we even accepted Frank. I don't understand, but may Starclan light your path. Once Swallowstar is gone, I'll let you back in the clan." Adderjaw let his tail rest on Cloudwhisp's back. "The sooner the better." As he spoke his gaze met Swallowstar's.
"We'll be fine. I think we might just join another clan. I know that Rabbitstar is very accepting, Snowclan has a much better leader." Cloudwhisp glared at Swallowstar.
"I want to come with you!" Fernkit wailed frantically. Dapplecrown smiled with a certain knowing in her eyes only queens can have.
"No.. No..." Cloudwhisp began but was interrupted by Dapplecrown.
"Let her go," The queen said with a tear, "I know you'll never be able to experience the joy of having kits otherwise. She already looks to you as fathers and she doesn't need milk anymore." Fernkit's eyes lit up with joy and sorrow.
"Thank you, Dapplecrown. I love you." Starblaze nuzzled his sister and they turned to face Swallowstar. "I hope you're happy. Now, if you don't mind, we have brains to poison with unholy ideals."
Swallowstar hissed as the three pushed through the gorse tunnel into free territory. "Free cats." Cloudwhisp purred.
"This is going to be fun! I'll miss Dapplecrown, but I'll learn more this way!" Fernkit smiled happily while breathing in forest air. "Where to?"
"Caveclan." Starblaze said running towards the border.