It was another bright and sunny day in Hollywood, and a certain actor was on his way to the beach. This actor is none other than Chris Pratt. He not only wanted to spend time in the sun, he wants to find a potential mate. His limo pulls into his driveway and he hops in. Chris tells his driver to take him to Venice Beach. Anything for you Mr Pratt. Said the driver in a very seductive voice. Chris gives him a confused stare. 3 awkward hours pass as they arrive. Chris removes his shirt, nipples still red from before. He approaches a group of what appear to be sorority girls. "Hello, ladies. Let me introduce myself. I'M CHRIS PRATT!!"
One lady recognizes him from parks and recreation, one lady recognizes him from Jurassic world, and one lady was just uncultured. Fan girling, one woman was checking him out. "What happened to your nipples??" She asked. "How about we discuss it over a bottle of wine and dinner?" He seductively asked. "Oh...okay!" She exclaimed.
But who was the girl Chris met at the beach? The one and only Selena Gomez. She made her way to Chris's house, wondering what could possibly have happened to his nipples to make them so red. "Are they sunburned?" she wondered. She was now only a block away from Chris's house. She would soon find that nothing would prepare her for the truth.
She arrives at Casa de Pratt. Knock knock knock. "Come on in! I'm in the kitchen, make yourself comfortable!" Selena walks in and sets her stuff on the couch. She sits down on another couch in the room. She gets a message of Facebook. Its Chris. "Take the casserole out of the oven in two minutes. Ill be back shortly. She gets confused and waits.
"Where could he have gone?" She wonders. "I didn't see him leave." 2 minutes pass. She gets up and removes the casserole. It smells amazing. She sets the casserole on the table and sits down. The table starts vibrating then goes into a violent shake. "BOOM! SPLOOSH! SPLAT!" The casserole explodes all over a frightened Selena Gomez. Chris Pratt emerges from the casserole dish and whispers into her ear. The whisper slowly raises to a shout. "I... am...ChRIS PRATT!!" Selena grabs his cheek and kisses him. "I told you I'd be back soon" he says seductively. The scene fades into darkness.