I own nothing…so I have to make do in the realm of fanfic…
(Story takes place right at the end of the episode, "Lost Boys")
Without further ado…."You're With Me"
Teyla stood frozen in place and she felt as if time itself had slowed down around her.
"You want me."
"No!" Teyla felt the scream well up in her throat as Lt. Col. John Sheppard was taken away, being led down a corridor to face the enemy alone…without her by his side.
Teyla wanted to run forward to the doorway of the cell she was being held in, yell out in pent up frustration, reach out her hand towards the now empty hallway as if that would somehow bring her closer to John…but she didn't, the long fought for control she has spent years creating held in place and she make no outward movement to betray her inner turmoil.
Instinct overruled the panic and desperation as Teyla fell into the role she felt most comfortable in, a role honed by her years of watching out for the well being of the Athosian people, that of caretaker…She went over to Ronon and grasping his arm, slipped it over her shoulder and pulled him to his feet, allowing him to lean against her to balance out his unsteadiness from being hit by two wraith stun blast.
While slightly incapacitated physically, Ronon was not backing down and his own frustration at their capture manifested itself in anger aimed at Ford, "If he dies…you die."
Teyla stiffened slightly, "he dies…if he dies…if John dies…"
The words seemed to echo throughout the cell and pound into Teyla's mind, overwhelming her thoughts. A coldness seemed to sweep through Teyla's body, one of despair at the thought of John standing alone to face the wraith, starting to feed upon him…
"No." Teyla mentally shook herself as she mechanically helped Ronon over to the bench she had been sitting on only moments before…An image floated across Teyla's vision…John's head lay in her lap, Teyla's hand hovering uncertainly across his brow as if to caress when he started to shift…"Are you alright?"
Teyla blinked her eyes to focus her attention and helped Ronon to lie down. She then stood back and unwittingly her gaze darted back towards the barred entryway and the long, dark hallway cast in shadow that lay beyond it, beyond her reach…just like John.
Or was he?
Teyla walked slowly towards the locked cell door and concentrated, her eyes narrowing in concentration as she tried to unlock the mechanism that prevented their escape. But after a few moments of straining to open the door, Teyla fell to her knees and hit her fist against the ground in angry frustration.
"I cannot do it," Teyla said her voice breaking on the last syllable.
"Teyla," Ronon's voice permeated through her defeat as she slowly lifted her gaze to look at Ronon still spread out on the bench.
Teyla knew Ronon wanted to help but…
"I cannot do it," Teyla repeated with a sigh as she reached out her hand to touch the doorway of the cell, still hoping her touch would somehow open the door. But the doorway did not move, remaining a barrier between them and the Col, the one she lov…
Teyla mentally shook herself again, shifting to lean up against the door.
The one she loved…yes…she did love him…the man who came into her life with a smile and forever changed it…
Teyla closed her eyes and let her mind wander to thoughts of John, remembering the first time she saw him with his messy black hair and boyish grin and suddenly her image became so vivid she could almost believe that he was right there with her.
In a misty haze that soon became clear Teyla found herself standing in the middle of an Athosian tent. She turned in a slow circle taking in the familiar sights of the Athosian Meeting Tent that she had spent many days before sharing a morning tea with her people. As she turned she stopped suddenly as she saw John standing before her, looking just as he did when he had first stepped through the tent flap and into her life. She walked over to him to stand before him and because she was experiencing nothing more then a memory she allowed herself to give in to the inner yearnings she kept hidden deep within herself.
She lifted her hand and with only a moment's hesitation cupped John's check, her fingers splayed across his cheekbones as she ran her thumb over the slight stubble darkening his jaw line. She traced his features with a soft touch, her eyes following the same path, and only stopped when her fingers brushed across John's lips. A shiver tingled itself through her body as she remembered that fateful day in the Atlantis gym…the kiss…
Teyla's other hand went involuntarily to her own lips as the feeling of John's lips on hers came back to haunt her. He had caught her by surprise. She had known something was different…even wrong…with John that day and when he kissed her, conflicting emotions had overcome her. She had stayed passive, not allowing herself to give in to the primal urge of her own to return his physical touch. But Teyla had known John was not in control and had held back…but to have kissed him back…
Teyla's eyes focused on John's lips, her fingers brushing over them one last time before, with a look of conviction, she stepped up to John, her body flush to his.
"I love you…like none other in the past," she whispered and then standing on tiptoe captured his lips in a kiss, releasing all the emotions she kept carefully guarded within her, allowing her love to finally shine through the solid walls she had build around her heart.
Teyla's vision was so vivid, she could almost feel John's lips move against her own and his arms slip around her to hold her close.
Teyla did what she would never allow herself to do in real life, act like a woman who loves another. Long ago she had promised on her father's death that she would put her people first but here in this dream world of her own making she could give into the emotions that had been growing inside since the day that John had first walked into her life.
A shiver of cold invaded her body, chasing a path down her spine that settled in the depths of her being. Teyla froze in John's arms as she broke their kiss. There was only thing that could create the deadening cold she was now feeling deep in her soul…the wraith…
Teyla stepped back from John's embrace and slowly turned, the cold plunging her into a nightmare, one she new all too well.
As if her nightmares had come to life Teyla saw a wraith standing before her, hand raised as if to start feeding but something was wrong…this wraith was female and she was not focused on Teyla…
Teyla felt a sickening emotion settle in her stomach as she whirled around to where she had been standing before wrapped in John's arms…The Athosian tent dissolved around her leaving Teyla standing in a large, dark chamber. In horror Teyla saw John kneeling on the ground, his face lifted up, defiance reflected in his eyes as he stared through her.
The cold intensified as Teyla felt the wraith behind her move…time slowed down around Teyla as she pivoted to face the wraith, ready to fight to protect John but as she came around her surroundings once again began to dissolve, the chamber quickly vanishing before her and the last clear image burned into her mind was of a wraith hand descending…
To Be Continued: