Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.
Author's Note: Written for the Hunger Games Competition over on HPFC. I used the word prompt, emotion prompt, character prompt, setting prompt, and subject prompt.
Susan's four years old, and Brownie - the stuffed bear she's had since she was a baby - has a long rip in his tummy, thanks to the dog. Brownie's stuffing is falling out, and Susan holds her hands protectively over the bear's injury, keeping as much of the stuffing in as she can. She carries Brownie over to her mum, frowning, her lip wobbling. "Brownie's hurt," she says, laying him face-up on her mother's lap. "Can you fix him?"
Susan's mum takes out her wand and points it at Brownie, murmuring a spell. The stuffing is pushed back inside, and the rip closes back up, looking as though it was never there. Susan runs her fingers over the healed area, and pulls both Brownie and her mother into a hug.
For the rest of the day, she looks forward to the time when she'll be able to fix things with just a simple wave of a wand.
o0o0o0o
St. Mungo's is crowded and baffling and just a bit exciting.
Nine-year-old Susan looks around the lobby eagerly, trying to pull away from her mother more than once. There are six other people in the lobby; two of them look completely normal, but the other four are definitely at the hospital for some form of help. One of them is bright purple, all over. Another one has eight fingers, and the last two - who bear a vague familial resemblance - are stuck together, back-to-back. Susan can't help herself from looking at them.
"Stop staring, Susie," her father says, quiet enough so that nobody but Susan can hear. "It's rude."
When he's not looking, Susan chances another glance at the people who need help, and she wonders how somebody would go about curing them. She wishes she could sit in and watch - watch as the purple slowly faded from the man's skin, watch as the woman's three extra fingers slowly disappeared, watch as the other two blokes finally separate.
The Bones family only stays in the lobby for a few minutes before they're given directions to Aunt Amelia's room. Aunt Amelia is sitting up in bed when they arrive, looking healthy except for a bandage on her arm. "You didn't have to come," Aunt Amelia says, although she does look a little bit pleased. "I'm being released tomorrow morning."
"What happened?" Susan asks, unable to rein in her curiosity.
"A bad man tried to hurt me," Aunt Amelia says, rubbing her arm. "I'm fine, though. The Healers are doing a good job taking care of me."
"I think I wanna be a Healer," Susan says. "I want to work here and fix people up."
Aunt Amelia smiles. "If you want to be a Healer," she says, "you will be. You can do anything you put your mind to, Susan. Remember that."
o0o0o0o
"HUFFLEPUFF!" the Sorting Hat yells, and Susan makes her way over to the Hufflepuff table. The only other first year Sorted into Hufflepuff so far is Hannah Abbott, who Susan had seen briefly on the Hogwarts Express. Hannah smiles at her, and Susan sits down next to Hannah; they watch the rest of the Sorting in silence, clapping for the other first years who join their table. As soon as all the students are Sorted, and Professor Dumbledore's made his opening speech, conversation breaks out amongst all the students.
"Do you have a class you're really excited for?" Hannah says to Susan. Hannah looks a little shy, pink-cheeked with either nervousness or excitement.
Susan shrugs. "I don't know," she says. "My Aunt Amelia says Defense Against the Dark Arts was her favorite, and that it's the best class, but I don't know what I'll like best. You?"
"Maybe Herbology," Hannah answers, "but I don't know either." She looks around, and then up at the enchanted ceiling. The wonder and amazement in her eyes is contagious, and Susan finds herself admiring the Great Hall as well. "Can you believe it?" Hannah says after a moment. "We're finally here, at Hogwarts."
o0o0o0o
"How do I look?" Hannah asks Susan, fussing with her blonde hair.
"You're fine," Susan says, patting down her own hair, which is irritatingly frizzy. "Does my hair look really bad?"
"You two are being idiots," Megan Jones, another Hufflepuff in their year, says. "Professor Lockhart isn't even that hot. And any bloke who constantly talks about how awesome he is needs to learn one big lesson: he's not nearly as awesome as he thinks he is." She rolls her eyes. "Defense is supposed to be a really awesome class. We're not learning anything besides what freaking Lockhart thinks of himself."
"How can you not think he's hot?" Hannah says, her mouth forming a near-perfect O-shape.
"He's old," Megan says. "Besides, even if he was really hot, the whole 'I'm-so-awesome' thing completely ruins it." She sighs. "My sister Hestia says you need to be really good at Defense to be an Auror. How am I supposed to be really good at Defense if we're not learning anything cool?"
"You want to be an Auror?" Susan asks.
Megan nods. Susan knows that Megan's older sister Hestia is an Auror, but she had no idea Megan wanted to follow in her sister's footstep. "What about you?"
"I want to be a Healer," Susan says. She hasn't wavered once from that decision, not since she was really little. Ever since she actually visited St. Mungo's, she's had her mind made up.
"That's neat," Megan says. She pauses a second, and then rummages in her book bag, pulling out a small volume that Susan instantly knows isn't one of their textbooks. "Hestia gave me this." She holds it up properly so Susan and Hannah can see the title, which reads How To Survive Away From Home. "Here. You can borrow it. There's a whole chapter on minor healing charms and basic healing potions and things like that."
Susan grins as Megan hands her the book. That night, she doesn't fall asleep until four in the morning, too busy reading the healing chapter and whispering the incantations over and over to herself.
o0o0o0o
"Ernie asked me to the Yule Ball!" Hannah jumps up and down in their dormitory, her pigtail bouncing up and down with her. "Can you believe it?"
For a moment, Susan feels a brief, tiny twinge of jealousy - why didn't Ernie ask her, not Hannah? - and then she pushes it down. Hannah's her best friend, and there's absolutely no way that she's going to become one of those girls who fights over a bloke. "That's awesome!" Susan says, hoping she sounds enthusiastic. At the very least, she's happy that Hannah is happy. "So are you two officially going out?"
"Oh, no," Hannah says, and then frowns. "Not that I know of, anyway. I guess I don't really know - we'll see what happens at the Yule Ball. He didn't really say whether he was asking me as a friend or as something more." She shrugs.
"Do you fancy him?" Susan asks.
Hannah shrugs again. "I mean, he's cute. And we get along. I like spending time with Ernie. But it's not like I'm madly in love with him or something like that - I'm just really happy I have a date to the Yule Ball." She grins again, twirling around like a little girl. "I need to get you to go with somebody now."
"I think Eloise, Megan, and I were just going to go as a group," Susan says. None of them have a date. As mean as it sounds, Susan's pretty sure nobody's going to ask Eloise Midgen - she looks far better now than she did in their first three years of school, but most people still remember her as the girl with the awful acne, and teenagers are mean about things like that. Megan's certainly pretty enough to get a date - she's had two boys ask her already - but she turned them both down, saying she'd have a much better time with her roommates than she would with some awkward bloke who would step on her feet the whole night.
Megan's probably right, of course, but Susan still wishes for a date, and as much as she tries, she can't fully shake the feeling that she wants that date to be Ernie.
o0o0o0o
"Oi, Susan!" Seamus Finnegan hurries over to where she's packing up her things, ready to sneak out of the Room of Requirement and back to her dormitory. Being in the D.A. is slightly terrifying - or, at least, the risk of being caught and tortured by Umbridge is slightly terrifying - but Susan could never bring herself to quit.
"Hey," Susan says.
Seamus rolls up his sleeve; there's a nasty abrasion there. "Missed the cushions when I was getting Stunned," he says ruefully. "Stone floor scraped me up pretty bad. Can you fix this up, or should I see Madam Pomfrey?"
Susan can't help a small smile from making its way onto her face. Unofficially, she's the Healer of the D.A. Whenever the D.A. members get banged up a little during practice - which happens relatively often - they usually end up making their way over to Susan. It started with the other Hufflepuffs - the ones who knew she wanted to be a Healer - but word spread, and now all the members end up coming to her. She hasn't had to send anybody to Madam Pomfrey yet; all of their injuries are minor enough for her to fix. "I got it," she says, taking out her wand. Ten seconds later, Seamus's arm is healed - still a little pink, probably still a bit tender, but it's not bleeding and it's not an open abrasion.
"Thanks!" Seamus hurries off, and Susan continues packing up her book bag. There's something inherently satisfying about healing people, something that just feels so good about helping them and curing them. Susan can't get enough, and not for the first time, she knows she's on the right path.
o0o0o0o
Aunt Amelia is dead.
Susan stares blankly at the wall of her bedroom, numb and empty. She can't imagine how her Aunt Amelia - strong, powerful Aunt Amelia - could be dead. The thought of a world without her is so unimaginable that Susan can't even bear to think about it. Her aunt is - was, Susan reminds herself, and then wants to cry again - the person she trusted more than anybody, more than her own parents, even.
A concerned letter from Hannah sits on Susan's desk. Susan had read it when her owl brought it in, but she can't bring herself to respond. Hannah had seen the Daily Prophet article about Aunt Amelia's death and had instantly written to Susan, according to the first sentence of the letter. It's a touching gesture, and Susan knows that Hannah is just being a good friend, but the thought of sitting down and writing is impossible. She can't bring herself to be productive - can't bring herself to do something, even something as basic as writing a letter. All she wants to do is lie on her bed, stare at the ceiling, maybe cry a bit. Anything else is just too much to ask.
A few days later, when the funeral happens, Susan excuses herself halfway through, and sits in the lavatory for the remainder of the service, crying. Seeing the body is bad enough; seeing the body while listening to everybody talk about her achievements and how she will be missed is so much worse.
o0o0o0o
Susan writes home nearly every day of her sixth year.
When You-Know-Who had first risen to power, he had killed Susan's grandparents, her Uncle Edgar, his wife, and their children. They had died right around the time she was born, and if she had met them, she certainly didn't remember it.
Now, he's back, and he had killed Susan's aunt. The Bones family - a relatively influential Wizarding family with non-supremacist views - is obviously one of his targets this time around, too, and it terrifies Susan. She's safe at Hogwarts, but her parents are still working at the Ministry, still going about their normal routines, still in danger, and she's scared for them. Just like a homesick firstie, she writes her parents constantly, expecting letters back just as often and getting anxious when they take even two days to respond.
She's even scared to go to Hogsmeade, but eventually Hannah and Ernie convince her.
"If You-Know-Who pops up from behind one of the shelves at Honeydukes," Ernie says, "I think I'll piss myself laughing."
Susan gives in, and goes to each Hogsmeade weekend, looking over her shoulder the entire time.
o0o0o0o
Sixth year sucked.
Seventh year is hell.
The D.A. has re-formed, this time not only to teach Defense but to oppose the Carrows' regime. Everyone from the first D.A. who is still at Hogwarts rejoins, but they're accompanied by a few dozen other students who weren't in the first one. It makes sense to Susan; the Carrows make Umbridge look like a playful puppy. People who were able to deal with Umbridge have reached their breaking point with the Carrows.
The detention methods become well-known around the school by the third week of classes. Students are either furious or terrified; there doesn't seem to be an in-between in many cases. At the end of September, the Carrows create a new rule: Madam Pomfrey is not allowed to treat injuries that come from a detention unless the injuries are life-threatening or extremely serious.
Susan steps in, and all the Hufflepuffs who get detention come to her; the Ravenclaws go to Anthony Goldstein, and the Gryffindors to Fay Dunbar.
Susan spends most of her free time in the library, researching healing methods as much as she can. She brews Pain-killing Potion in the dormitory; students steal the ingredients from Slughorn's stock, slipping ingredients into their robes or bags during Potions lessons or even sneaking into the Potions dungeon when nobody is in there. They bring the ingredients to Susan. She's scared for them, scared they'll get caught and punished for something she's doing, but it's an easier alternative than stealing this much herself.
Ernie helps as much as he can. He's the best in Potions, at least out of the Hufflepuff seventh years, and although Susan can hold her own, Ernie's even better. Sometimes - when she's particularly busy or particularly tired - he brews potions for her, directing the ingredient-thieves like he's been doing it all his life. He doesn't help with the charms and spells, but those are much easier, and Susan's fine doing that side of things on her own.
"I wish I had some way to repay you," Susan says one day, after he brings her a cauldron full of Pain-killing Potion to distribute.
He grins. "I don't mind helping you," he says, and there's just enough emphasis on 'you' that Susan feels her heart flutter a little bit.
o0o0o0o
In April, the Michael Corner incident tests Susan's skills more than anything else she's ever done.
Michael - a Ravenclaw in her year - is caught by the Carrows letting a first year escape from the dungeons. The first year gets away with Michael's co-conspirator, Morag MacDougal, but Michael lets himself be caught so that the two of them can make a clean escape.
The Carrows, of course, do not take kindly to this, and at six in the morning, Susan's Galleon - which she keeps in her hand while she sleeps - heats up to the point of burning; she jolts awake, dropping it and staring at the message.
'susan dungeon now'
She throws on a robe, grabs her kit - basic potions and supplies, stored in her old book bag - and runs as fast as she can, tearing through the school halls at a pace that is not common for an eighteen-year-old at six in the morning. By the time she reaches the dungeons, she's out of breath but focused. Anthony, Fay, and Morag are huddled around Michael, who's unconscious and bleeding on the floor.
"It's my fault," Morag says, staring at him. "It's all my fault - I should have stayed -"
"No," Susan says. "Don't think like that." She examines Michael, not even sure where to begin. His head is bleeding, although the cut seems superficial; she's far more concerned about how long the Carrows held him under the Cruciatus and what other injuries he may have. His arm seems twisted at an odd angle, and he's got several shallow cuts on both his arms; they've stopped bleeding, thankfully. "I need to get him to the Room of Requirement," she says. "He needs at least a few days in bed to recover, and there's no way the Carrows would let him ditch class. Help me bring him up there?"
They make an odd procession. Fay and Susan handle the process of levitating Michael without jostling him at all; Morag walks ahead of them to check for patrols, and Anthony stays behind them to do the same thing. Twice, they have to double back their route. A walk which should have taken five minutes at most ends up taking twenty, and Susan ends up treating Michael's head wound while they're moving, since he's leaving a blood trail.
The Room of Requirement is already inhabited by a couple D.A. members. As soon as the four of them make it inside, Neville, Seamus, and a few of the others hurry over to them; Susan promptly waves them away and brings Michael into a bed.
It takes her three hours before she can confidently say that he'll be fine.
Sore as hell, definitely - Pain-killing Potion can only help so much with something as strong as Cruciatus aftereffects, especially considering the length of time it was performed - but physically healthy.
She's a little more concerned about his mental state.
o0o0o0o
Michael wakes up the next day, groggy, disoriented, and freaked out, but considering what he went through, Susan had expected a lot worse. She stays in the Room of Requirement now as well, treating Michael; he feels like her patient even if he technically should be Anthony's based on House loyalties. Anthony has returned to classes, though, and hasn't made the switch to living in the Room. Susan's willing to make the sacrifice.
Morag comes to visit constantly, slipping away from classes as often as she can. Susan knows she feels guilty over Michael's torture; it's obvious that Morag thinks it should have been her. Eventually, Morag comes to stay; eventually, most of the D.A. finds their way into the Room of Requirement after particularly intense interrogations by the Carrows, who are wondering about all the students who have abandoned their education.
Nobody gives them up, not even the fourth and fifth years.
o0o0o0o
When the Battle of Hogwarts is over, Susan works alongside Madam Pomfrey treating the injured. Anthony does the same. Fay is dead; they tried to save her but couldn't.
The death count - on their side - is fifty. Students, parents, Hogsmeade residents, Order of the Phoenix members, all laying in a row. Some of them are far too young to have even been there. All the students under seventeen were escorted out, but all the underage D.A. members returned, as did some of the other underage students. Susan's positive that none of them realized just how brutal the battle would be.
She knows she didn't realize it.
o0o0o0o
The next month, St. Mungo's hires her as a trainee Healer. She never got her NEWTs - the Battle of Hogwarts happened before NEWTs would have taken place, and nobody technically finished that school year - but according to the people who hire her, real-life experience is more important than NEWTs. It's the same for the Auror Office; they open their doors to any seventeen- or eighteen-year-old student who fought in the Battle of Hogwarts.
She spends most of that summer with Ernie. They don't talk much. They don't do much. It's just comforting to be in his presence, and Susan is content to lay their on the sofa, her head on his chest, just relaxing. He understands everything she's gone through in the past year. He understands her.
That's all she really needs. She has the career she always wanted, and she's with the bloke she's wanted for a few years. She knows she's not okay - after the events of the last year, who could really be okay? - but she feels just a little bit better every day, and she supposes that's the best she can hope for.