Disclaimer: I don't own Saint Seiya or any of its characters (including two that I will use mainly for this fic), so if you find any OOC-ness in this story, it wouldn't be so much of a surprise, eh?
--- Start---
It never was a reason.
Both of us knew that his death was not an excuse for all of this.
Why should the demise of such a good person be a heavenly event for those he had left for good?
Doesn't make any sense.
Of course, unless the whole issue was to be about something close as a disguised consent, then we should have nothing to worry about after all. Might as well go on with our lives and precede things as they're supposed to be preceded, and stop living in the past, which we all know, will not return to get fixed.
…No.
I couldn't conceive this, yet at the very same time, unwilling to release my zigzagged perplexity, because of the tremendous sum of contentment towards this moment I cherish more than anything. In addition to that, there's nothing I could do to get rid of the most satisfying guilt I've ever felt for the very first time in my existence.
Why?
I can't even answer that before the question popped out, how would I do now?
How exactly would I elucidate the reality of which I've contributed to my deceased best friend that I have the woman he loves holding my hand, while the two of us are looking down at his gravestone? How would I explain to him that when he died, both her and I were faced by this massive wall that were corrupting everyone of us, unless we crumble it, and be prepared for whatever that comes out subsequently.
Should I resent more?
Should she join me in my resentment?
All I wanted was his affirmation that neither her nor me had betrayed him. In any way, and for any reason, he would give us his approval.
I tightened my grip around hers, repudiating to release her presence, hoping that she would give me answers so that I can disperse myself from my own malice. Perhaps I'm too much of a coward to survive with thorns piercing my heart while it was I who put them there in the first place anyway.
"It's not a sin." She said. Her tone was indecisive and surprisingly stern, partially a contrast to her usual way of stating an opinion. I looked at her and saw those stunning violet eyes gaping at mine in the company of a resolutely worried expression. Was she trying to calm me for the obvious reason?
I said nothing in return for a bitter smile fixed on my lips, and gently pulled her hand to hook my waistline, so that I could clasp her in my arms. Feeling her warm breath on my neck keeps me comfortable in the cold wind of late autumn. I just wished that I would do, if not the same, more for her.
It was only a week ago that we both found out that our feelings have been mutual since we could remember. A few months after… the incident, that is. And just days after our so-called restoration…
I accidentally said some things about him that she shouldn't hear coming from me. Things about what he'd secretly told me about his feelings for her, and how far he would go to give her its evidence. How he worship her… how devastated he was whenever she decided to exclude him from her decisions…
As the tears started to roll down, I embraced her, desperately hoping that she'd calm down within my insignificant effort, and…
Triggering the one thing I dreaded the most at that time.
….
Love.
We weren't…
We weren't supposed to kiss…
We weren't supposed to confess each other's feelings, and then say how much we kept the distance all this time just for HIS sake.
We…
We weren't supposed to make love…
Nothing correct in this life can be so liberating and perfect, so what we did was absolutely wrong! It was erroneous, and distorted!
I…---
"Nothing beats the sight of her smile." His voice prompted, "I mean, what more can you ask for the woman you love the most 'cept for her happiness?"
…
For the fist time in months, she can finally smile and laugh as much as she usually does when you're still alive, my friend…
She's closer than ever to the four of us, and I've never seen her so radiant before. It's like something so profound had been lifted off her shoulders…
"I didn't do that… did I?" I asked her, slightly loosening the firmness of my hold, until she retracted herself to look at me in the eye yet again. She looked puzzled for a while, but then I decided to save her the worthless trouble.
"I wasn't the one who made you smile and laugh again, was I?"
She paused; her visage seemed rather irritated and doubtful at the same time, but as I was getting ready for either a sigh or an annoyed frown upon her brow, a widen length of arms from across came right at me for a tight hug. I couldn't react much; she didn't give me much time to respond to that one as she draws he lips to my ear and whispered;
"Shiryu-no baka."
"Eh?"
She pushed me slightly away for giving us a better distance to look at each other, and a big smile was there on her beautiful face as there were tears welling up in her amethyst eyes. I knew I've probably gawked at her effectively enough for both her palms to land on my cheeks. Before I knew it, she said an utterance of the most divine to my acceptance;
"You're my reason to be…" Saori said to me without a trace of doubt in her tone.
…
That has got to be the most wonderful thing a person can say in this lifetime.
And I'm nothing but blessed to have heard that coming from the woman who governs my heart.
"Thank you…" I replied without any idea on how I sounded to her when she looked blurred all of a sudden, and wetness came rolling down my held cheeks, and onto her hands. I pulled her close and rest my forehead to her shoulder, "I love you…"
And hoping that Seiya would let me…
-fin-
Author's Note: Arrgh, this is what happens if you're the ONLY fan of a Shiryu/Saori coupling out there! *rips hair* Anyways, criticism and other forms of commentaries are most welcome. Thank you for reading… -Tevia-