AN: I don't own Harry Potter.

"Oi, Evans! You, me, Black Lake, half an hour! I want to redeem myself!"

"I'm gonna have to say no."

"What? But… didn't you like it yesterday? "

"Contrary to popular belief, rushing off with guys to the Hospital Wing after they almost bit their bloody tongue off is not my idea of a nicely spent afternoon."

"That wouldn't have happened if you didn't practically throw yourself at me!"

"Throw myself at you! As if! I was simply minding my own business when you just appeared out of nowhere and bumped into me. Since I was going faster, I naturally ended up on top."

"C'mon, Evans, you know I'm not very good with this stuff. Most things I know from paying attention to Sirius.

"Yeah, 'cause that's the way to learn thing. Listen to Sirius."

"He's not just a self-proclaimed genius, you know. A lot of other people can vouch for him. Most are girls, though, since guy on guy training session doesn't exactly flow other people's boats."

"I don't know what you're talking about. Guy on guy and is perfectly acceptable. Girl on girl as well. Why, it was my sister who introduced me into this wonderful world."

"Eww! Gross Evans! There's no way your first time was with a girl. And with your sister nonetheless."

"No, I'm serious! There are some things one can only learn from the member of the same gender."

"Okay, A – You're not Sirius, you're Lily. And B – I stand by my eww. Guys don't train with guys, that's just gross."

"Extensive vocabulary you got there, Potter. And did you just really use that Sirius pun? That got old in first year. And what's so bad about Sirius teaching you? You don't care who teaches you as a kid, why should it matter now?"

"I suppose it's fine when you're a kid, but I'm not and I simply refuse to have Sirius or other guys as teachers. Not when there are girls available now."

"You're such a chauvinistic pig."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. But really Lily, why can't you teach me? You're more experienced than I am and it's your duty to pass on the knowledge to youngsters."

"Alright, alright, I'll do it, Just let me go and grab my skates, yeah?"

Surprise! Don't you just love when you think you're reading something and it turns out to be something completely different? Inspired by Marauder Number Fiive's My, That's a Mighty Long Wand You've Got There. Not sorry about the Sirius pun, though; always wanted to use it. R&R please!