A/N: Just a hilarious idea I got while watching one of my favorite tv shows. If you've never seen Malcolm in the Middle (or least, the episode Robbery) then you're in for a real treat.

Each chapter is less than two pages long for an easy read (Baked Potatoes is the longest chapter at 3 pages) with plenty of hilarity and chaos to ensure good laughs :)

This was originally going to be a reeeaaally long oneshot, but I decided to split it up into regular chapters. This story is already finished, so go ahead and review the chapters you like and fave if you can :)

Sasha, if you're reading this, I'm gonna have your Galehanna story up real soon :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Malcolm In The Middle or The Hunger Games.

1. 10% Discount

Katniss Hawthorne sat boredly in the break room, drumming her fingers repeatedly along the cheap plastic surface of the bench at which she had seated herself.

It was another late shift at The Hob, and Katniss couldn't be more thrilled. Sarcastically, of course. She didn't want to be there. She wanted to be home, with her husband and sister and brother-in-law, not at some shabby convenience store.

And not to mention the fact that the house would probably be a wreck by the time she got home. Gale was working late, too, and as a result, Katniss had to enlist the help of her best friend Johanna to babysit for Rory and Prim. It wasn't that she didn't trust Johanna, it was just...well, yeah, she didn't trust Johanna.

It was just that she could be such a kid - she knew for a fact that Prim was more mature than her - but alas, given the circumstances, Katniss had no choice. And now, she was at work, Gale was just getting off work, and Johanna was alone with their siblings at 7:30 in the evening...and the worry that thought suddenly emitted was startling.

Katniss sighed, pulling out her purse so she could dig out her cellphone.

Maybe if she texted Prim or Johanna she could go about the rest of her night feeling less-

"Hey, Katniss!"

-never mind.

Composing her face into an expression of cheer, Katniss looked up from her purse to find her co-worker staring happily down at her.

Peeta.

"Hello, Peeta." She greeted, smiling as nicely as possible. The way her mouth curled up felt so weird...

"Notice anything different about me?" Peeta asked giddily.

She furrowed her brows. Peeta was always happy (to the point where it was downright strange in her mind) but this was different. He was acting like a little kid who had just gotten an early Christmas gift. And it was September.

She looked him over. "Youuuu cut your hair?" She asked, completely lost.

Peeta smiled jokingly. "Oh, Katniss, don't be ridiculous. Look-" he paused to bring a presenting hand up to his chest, hovering over his name tag.

Katniss read it closely.

Assistant Manager.

"Yep," Peeta grinned, seeing her mouth fall open in realization. "Just got it in today; Peeta Mellark, Assistant Manager."

Katniss smiled at him, shocked. "Um...wow, congratulations, Peeta! That's...great!"

"Yep, and with my new badge comes an extra 10% discount, which I'm more than happy to share with you, of course."

She froze. "Oh...no. Peeta, that's your discount, not mine. And, I wouldn't feel right about taking advantage of you like that."

Peeta's smile faltered for a split second, but didn't give up. "Oh no, it's okay. I'm happy to share it. I mean...I know how hard you work all the time, and...and I wanna help."

Seeing that her break was over, Katniss put her purse back beneath the table and stood up. She liked Peeta, she really did, but sometimes he was just...too pushy.

"...I just wouldn't feel good about it," She smiled.

Thinking that was that, she walked out of the break room and back out into the store to finish her shift.

"But what good is all that power if I don't have anyone to share it with?" He called insistently from behind her, following her to her through the aisles.

Unfortunately, Peeta didn't seem to get the hint.

Resisting the urge to roll her eyes, Katniss exhaled deeply as she stopped to round the corner of another aisle. Clove walked by.

"Oh, Clove," Peeta said, getting the short woman's attention. "Would you please check out aisle 10? Someone knocked over the DVD rack. Oh! And could you put the Tarty Smartys on a lower shelf? The kids keep trying to climb to get up to 'em and I'm afraid someone's gonna get hurt."

Clove shrugged. "Sure."

The brunette walked away, and Peeta turned to make sure she was gone before giving Katniss a strangely conspiratorial, strangely chipper look.

"Did you see that? Did you see the resentment in her tone? Isn't it great? Look, I'm shaking!"

He held out his arm to prove his point, the limb shaking with vigor to illustrate the unsteady hold he held on his new-found 'power'.

Trying to kill the urge to laugh, Katniss covered her mouth with the back of her hand and continued walking over to her register, Peeta following close behind.