The Difference
"No way."
"Not a chance."
The two answers were very much the same on the surface, but I heard the difference. I saw the difference in their looks. And that's how I found myself staring at the ceiling in my bunk at 2 a.m. playing with the tag around my wrist.
"No way."
"Not a chance."
I'd known Miles for a long time. Everything about him was safe; he was familiar. I saw the incredulous set of his mouth and the furrow in his brow. The way he looked down at me and dismissed my idea was so contrary to what I'd come to expect after only a few weeks working with this team.
"You're a hacker, Skye, not SEAL team 6."
There was something in his voice that irritated me. He was incredulous, as if he couldn't imagine me going into so much violence. That was the moment that I realized I'd changed. For the better. Miles had picked me up when I'd been at my lowest. He'd been the one to teach me how to hack real systems. He had been the one to focus my anger and use it. But he'd let me down, too. Taking money for hacking was against everything he and I had ever stood for.
"No way."
"Not a chance."
Ward's voice was hard, his eyes were steely. I knew I should be afraid, but I wasn't. Because - while I wasn't naive enough to think I knew him, knew him - I knew well enough that under that anger was hurt. I'd betrayed him, and he didn't trust me. Sure, he could get me in there - and he'd do it, no problem - but he didn't trust me not to stab him in the back. While it hurt, I understood. If the situations were reversed, I knew I wouldn't be near as understanding as he was being.
Another small piece of my heart wondered if part of his sharp retort wasn't him being just a little bit protective of me. I wondered if that big brother instinct was coming out for me. The idea made me feel warm inside.
Eventually, whether he trusted me or not, he'd taken me into the thick of things. We saved May and Coulson, and I even managed to hack into a few other files. It was the least I could do, after all.
"No way."
"Not a chance."
Two similar answers with two very different meanings. And I realized that maybe this new man knew me better than the old one ever had. It was enough to strengthen my resolve. Tomorrow I would apologize, and it would just be one more step to earning back that trust.
One man had picked me up, taught me, and instilled ideals in me that he had failed to live up to. But he didn't believe in me.
And Ward, well he knew I could do it. That was never the objection. He'd believed in me, albeit reluctantly, from day one.
And really, that was the difference.