I do not own twilight I just write for fun I'm not even half as good as SM. I know there are a lot of stories out there where Bella gets abused by her dad. I was just hoping mine was different at least in a way. I got the idea to make it like this because I woke up and wanted to write it. I'm going to try and make Bella as much as me as possible ok on with the story and no more crazy long a/n
"Shit" That one really hurt I wasn't going to say anything. I know it only encourages that monster to hit me harder. I just wasn't expecting him to grab me by my neck. I couldn't contain myself or my mouth at the moment. He must really be in a bad mood it just had to be a Monday. Now it's 6:30 am and 'dad' is beating me relentlessly. He thought it would be a good idea to wake me up with an extra hard beating this morning, and he was determined to get his way. He walked into my room at 6:00 am this morning. He grabbed me by my hair and pulled me down the stairs. I can remember what I said when he woke me up.
Flashback
"Wake the hell up bitch you have school today." He must have gotten tired of waiting being impatient as always. Next thing I know I'm being dragged out of bed by my hair. "I don't have all day for you to grace me with your presence bitch." I was then pulled down the stairs by my hair and pulled into the living room. I mentally scoffed right living room. To me it was the room where I might just die one day.
"So she's gone and it's time for our talk." He said laughing evilly. I was scared but I tried not to let him see it on my face. My face must have betrayed me because he pulled me to him. "Aw baby you don't need to be scared daddy just wants to talk to you." Then he punched me in the stomach. I doubled over in pain only to be forced straight again. "Now how can we talk if you're not looking at me? I want to see your face when I'm talking to you." He yelled at me as spit flew out his mouth.
I looked him in the eyes stubbornly with my chin jutting out in defiance. I was waiting for the next blow. Only it never came instead he grabbed my arms tightly and started to shake me. I flopped around like a rag doll in his hands. "Don't you ever look at me like that. You're just lucky I can't fucking slap your teeth out your damn mouth." He yelled giving me one final fierce shake then letting me go.
I felt my mind go fuzzy and the darkness was starting to take me over. 'Dad' must have seen it because he started to punch me repeatedly on my stomach. So that I won't pass out on him no doubt. The pain brought me back from the blankness. Great just what he wanted to make me suffer. He beat me for a while when I felt my head start to drop again as the darkness crept back up. That was when he roughly grabbed me by the neck and I cursed. Then I ended up on the floor before I noticed anything else.
End flashback
"You say something sweetie?" He asked in the repulsively sweet voice he uses when he acts like a parent. God I hate when he pretends to act like the concerned father like he really gives a damn. I looked up at him from my spot on the ground. I wanted to make sure that his anger had passed. Before I even dared to open my mouth again I just had to look it was unavoidable. I immediately regretted looking up at all but it was too late. I had already seen the look on his face. The look he gave me really made me wish I had kept looking down.
When I looked up at his face I saw that frightening look he gives me. Right before he really lays into me. Shit like it hasn't been bad enough as it is for one day. I hate that look it sends shivers down my spine. Hell I really just hate him in general. I just wanted to disappear one way or another. I started to whimper when I saw him come closer to me and lean over me.
Shit this was going to hurt I can already tell. When he was in front of me I shivered. I thought he was going to kick me while I was down. He was one of those people that liked to put you down more then you already were.
Instead he grabbed me by the hair to lift me off the ground. I could feel the horrible pain coming from my scalp but tried to keep quite. I'm already in enough trouble as it is for a minute ago. I was not going to risk making him anymore upset if it was avoidable. I will not give him the satisfaction of hearing me beg. I will not be begging for my life not today, not now, and hopefully not ever.
"When I ask you a question you better answer me you ungrateful little bitch." He yelled in my face. I could see that he was getting more irritated. I had to be careful I was treading on thin ice. If someone were to see this they would think it was because I was being unresponsive. They would have been wrong because they don't know 'dad' not the real him anyway.
Yes he is upset but not for what you might think. Sure he gets mad when I don't answer him. But he is really mad that I won't let myself scream. That sadistic bastard likes to hear me scream and plead with him. He wants me to beg him to stop but we both know it won't work. He sure as hell won't stop even if I did scream. He just wants to have all the power over me so that he can fully control me. But much to his dismay and my pain of course I just won't give it to him. I'm just as stubborn as my dad so I will take as good as he can give. I try not to say a thing but sometimes a swear does slip my lips once in a while. There isn't much that I can do on those days like today. All I really want is for my dad to come back. Why did he leave me alone? I didn't have to be living in this hell but everything changed that day. Everything changed for the worse.
Hell everything changed in that whole year it was shortly after I turned 14. If only I could go back to that day almost 4 years ago. I would do anything I could to change the out come of that day. So that everything could go back to normal so that my dad could come back. If things where as they where before my life would be better. I know its stupid to blame all the bad things on simply one day in your life. Only this time I really can blame 'dad' for this one. I laughed right that makes sense Bella blame him. He's not the one that killed him.
On Days like today when he really wants to hear me beg him to stop he likes to hit me very hard. If only we didn't live so far from other people. I mean we lived in a fucking secluded area. He could just kill us and it would be days before anyone even knew a thing. I have always been aware of that but 'dad' likes to remind me. "Do you hear me slut?" He yelled violently slamming me down on the floor face first. All you could hear was the sickening thud of me hitting the ground and his raging breath. Shit I was so lost in my own thoughts that I never answered him.
Then he started to kick me in the stomach. "Yes" I said a little breathlessly. "Yes yes" I repeated over and over. I hated him so fucking much at the moment. What I would give to spit in his face. I hope he knows that was the only kind of begging he was going to get from me. I didn't really consider me agreeing with him at a time like this begging. I knew he did thought. Only because he couldn't get the real satisfaction of hearing me beg.
"Good girl now clean yourself up or you'll be late for school hurry up." I got up off the floor shaking trying not to look at him. I didn't want to encourage him to come back for seconds. Then I ran up the stairs to my room to grab some clean clothes for school. I thanked the person that came up with school. I get messed with a lot but its better then home. I was running a bit behind I wouldn't be late for school. I just liked to leave by 7 so that I could get away from 'dad' as soon as possible. When I got to the door to my bedroom I gently reached up to my lip and winced. I pulled my hand away and examined my fingers. Luckily I didn't have any blood on my fingers. Which was good I don't like blood and there was no need to faint now?
I walked into my room and pulled a dark blue long sleeved shirt from my drawer. Followed by some long jeans and then I picked up my sneakers off the floor. I'm just glad it's always rainy here in forks. That means I don't have to worry about it being too hot for long sleeves. I needed to wear long sleeves today for the first time ever. In the past four years there has never once been a need to wear them. Of course I have I mean it does always rain. It just sucks that it is actually a necessity today. He normally just hits me in the stomach never anything else. But today was just a bad day so far.
I walked out of my bedroom and walked into the bathroom. When I got to the bathroom I ran into the shower ignoring the mirror. I just didn't want to deal with what I looked like after that wake up call at least not yet. When the hot water hit my body a hiss escaped my lips. Shit that hurts. I looked down and a small gasp came out of my mouth. I already had a big bruise forming on my stomach and my arms were worse then I thought. I had black and blue finger prints all over my arms. It was painful to move them but I had to. I'll just take some Tylenol for the pain later.
'Dad' as I was forced to call him sure didn't hold back today. I thought to myself. It's not that I expected him to but still he is getting careless. I mean he left hand prints all over my arms for craps sake. If he didn't be more careful like he always was he was going to…
Bella don't even finish that thought. He is not being careless he was just in a crappier mood then usual. I told myself if I started to think him careless things would get bad. I would let my hopes get the better of me. He and I both knew he was never going to get caught and I was never going to get saved. Ha said that stupid little voice in my head. Not that I expected to be saved or anything. I mean really no one cared enough to notice. I am just not hopeful anymore.
I mean after 4 years you would think at least one person would have noticed. No one ever noticed much less the people that are closest to me. If only I could be wrong and that someone did notice but I'm not. I'm positive when it comes to this it being one of the things I never second guessed. This was definitely one of the only things I was fairly certain about. Well that and that he will never stop until ether he or I are dead. I also know for a fact he would rather it be me. Even at my age he wants me dead.
I always find myself wondering after my beatings if he was a boxer and just never told us. I mean lord knows I'm his favorite punching bag. When my muscles finally relaxed I washed my hair with my favorite shampoo and conditioner that smelled like strawberries. When I was done with my shower I reluctantly looked in the mirror. I saw the marks from his fingers on the back of my neck from when he grabbed me. The shirt I had picked is not going to cut it. I need a turtle neck to cover them up. I could use my hair to cover it but it might not be enough. I let my wet hair fall around my neck. I'll get a different shirt when I'm done. Luckily all I have on my face is a fat lip something that could easily be explained away.
Good if anyone asked I'll just tell them that I fell. I mean everyone knows I'm a klutz. Besides it's not like anyone will ask. I'm a loner I don't really hang out with anyone. I talk to very few people like Angela Webber. She is a really nice girl that I have a few classes with. Mike Newton who I work with at his parents' stores much to my disdain. He is an idiot that keeps hitting on me. Man is he gross I mean he slept with tons of girls. Then has the nerve to tell me I'm missing out eww. Then there is Alice Cullen well when it comes to Alice it's more like she talks to me. She is a little pixie like girl with short pointy black hair. I have almost all my classes with her I like her ok. She's nice and all maybe a little too hyper for me. We could have been friends in another life time. We are not friends now it's more like we talk sometimes.
This is perfectly fine with me. I mean she is 'his' sister and it would be weird if I had to hang around him. Just because his sister and I were friends I don't think I could take it. I only have one real friend and he is not even here right now. I sighed sadly. I wish he were here with me he would know how to make me laugh. Not even he knows about what 'dad' does to me. Who knows what he would do if he ever found out. I shivered just thinking about it.
No that would never happen I won't let him or anyone find out. I'm not even worth it. I'm not worth anything I'm reminded of that everyday. If my only best friend were to get hurt because of me if anyone were to get hurt because of me. I would never be able to live with that. I would never be able to live with myself.
By the time I was done in the bathroom it was almost 7. I was only I there about 15 minutes it felt longer somehow. I was walking out of the bathroom to get a new shirt one that covers my neck. When the devil him self started calling me. "Bella hurry the fuck up! I'm hungry and I have to get to work. What do I have to go up there and bring you down here myself? I don't think you would like if I did that would you sweetie?" He asked laughing darkly. I cringed hell no I sure as hell would not like that. I'm not in the mood to be pushed down the stairs. I'm going to have to stay in this shirt. I thought as I buttoned it all the way to the top button. Then I ran down the stairs as carefully as I could. I ran into the kitchen to make him something to eat. Sure he only pushed me down the stairs twice, but I rather trip down the stairs on my own accord. It hurts like hell as it is even when I fall on my own. But it is still ten times better then being pushed roughly down the stairs. Last time he "helped" me down the stairs I sprained my ankle. No I'm not going through that today I'm in enough pain as it is.
The pain in my stomach and just about the rest of my body is enough for today. I guess being kicked repeatedly does that to you. Go figure I said sarcastically to myself. I was going to be limping from the pain alone. No I do not need another sprained ankle.
I quickly got to work making the monster some breakfast. I know better then to make him wait for food, or worse late for work down at the station. He was the police chef of Forks. Last time I made him late for work I really thought he was going to kill me. I thought he was finally going to go through with his threats.
He thought that since he was already late it would be ok to "talk". During that talk he thought it would be fun to put his gun to my head while he slapped me around. Then he oh so sweetly reminded me that he could pull the trigger and no one would care. I knew he was right of course the only people that would care would be in danger as well. So I know that it would be short lived because they would surely join me in the after life. I didn't have time today so all I did was make him some bacon and eggs. When I set the plate in front of him I saw that he had his gun in his hand. I started to whimper and shake uncontrollably. 'Not again' I thought to myself.
"That's good Bella it's about time I thought I would have to teach you another lesson. I mean so soon after the one from this morning too." He said shaking his head in mock shame. "Now get the fuck to school before I change my mind." He snapped. "Have a good day." He added sweetly. I went to leave the room when he cleared his throat. I turned to face him and almost jumped back in fear. He had that evil look in his eyes again. Shit what did I do now?
"Yes dad?" I asked trembling slightly. "Well aren't you going to thank me?" He asked his voice getting louder. "I said have a good day. You are supposed to say thank you dad." No that evil glint in his eyes was getting darker by the second. "Yes your right I'm sorry to upset you dad thank you." I said backing up. I internally laughed. 'Yeah Bella you can outrun a bullet right.' I told myself sarcastically. I looked back up at him to see that the intensity in his eyes had dulled a bit. "Good girl Bella. I knew your mom instilled some good manners in you now leave." He growled at me. Then he was digging into his food.
I ran out of the house like the devil was hot on my heels. Which if you think about it that wasn't far from the truth. I jumped into my truck and realized too late that it wasn't a good idea. I winced when a sudden sharp pain shot through me. Shit and I forgot that damn pain pills too. There is no way I am going back into that house. So I started my truck and drove to school. It didn't take long to get to there. Even thought I was running late when I checked the time on my cell it was only a little past seven-thirty. I still can't believe I have this damn thing. I was lucky and got it for my birthday last year when I turned 17. I can't believe I still have it but 'dad' knows better then to take it away. If he did too many questions would arise and daddy dearest can't have that. I laughed humorlessly to myself.
Besides even if he won't admit it I know he likes that fact that he can reach me. He likes to call if I'm running late from work so he can talk shit about my cooking. He always demands to know what 'the crap' as he calls it was. On the days that I work I make dinner in the morning. Then I stick it in the over and turn it on when I get home from school. It saves me lots of time that way. I got to school and parked in the student parking lot. I got as close as I could to the front doors with out taking someone's spot. The 'popular' kids would kill me if I took their parking spots. I still had about twenty minutes before school started. Guess I'll just go straight to first period and read while I wait. Normally if I had that much free time I would go to the library. Today was different I don't want to deal with 'him'. I don't want to have to lie to him. Or worse have to play a forced one way game of twenty questions. When I say a one way I mean it. The little shit always ask me questions and never gives up. Then when I ask him something he gets all quiet and doesn't answer.
I cut the engine and got out of the truck, and me being the ever clumsy me tripped when I got out. But before I hit the hard ground I hit a huge bulky mass of a fleshy wall. Wait a wall of flesh in the middle of the parking lot. When I look up to see what I had hit I saw a huge smiling face. He had dimples, golden eyes, and a full head of curly brown hair. Dimples as I call him simply because I didn't know his name cleared his throat. Then that was when I realized a little too late that I had been staring. My head must still be fuzzy from this morning. I quickly looked down and felt the blood rush to my cheeks in a tell-tale blush. I heard loud laughter coming from dimples.
"Sorry" I mumbled shyly. "Hey no problem I'm the one that should be sorry. I wasn't looking where I was going. I seemed to have been distracted by something. I'm Emmett Cullen by the way." I looked up to see a dazzling smile on Emmett's face. "I'm Bella Swan, um are you new here Emmett?" Shit why did I ask him that it was stupid so stupid. "No I've been in this school for a few years three to be exact." "Oh" Smooth Bella real smooth.
"Sorry it's just that I never really noticed you before no offense." Great this is going great just offend him some more why don't you. "Well I can say the same for you Bella. Hey are you ok?" He asked suddenly seeming worried. "Yes I am why do you ask?" I asked nervously as I tugged on my collar. Did I wince when I ran into him and not notice. "Well your lip I hit you harder then I thought. Shit I'm so sorry." He said reaching a hand out to my face. I flinched and quickly pulled back. When I did I saw the hurt flash through his eyes. "Oh sorry I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. Yeah no it's ok I fell this morning that's all it wasn't you. I better go nice meeting you Emmett." I was turning when I heard a little voice behind me.
"Hey Em here you are I was looking for you. So who's your friend?" I turned to see Alice Cullen looking at me. Oh shit wait Cullen Emmett Cullen duh it's him who the hell else would it be. They even have the same dazzling smile I should have known. Why didn't I remember maybe…? "Bella is that you?" Alice asked bringing me back to the present. "Hey it's you I didn't know you knew my brother." I didn't even know what to say I mean what if 'he' found out man of course he will. "I uh well I don't know your brother. I mean I do but I mean we just um." What am I going to do now? I'm screwed now really screwed. A big fucking thank you to me and my clumsiness.