Broken
There was one good thing, the empathy teen realized, about controlling emotions. She could hide the fact that she was broken. As a child, she used to hate holding everything in, she hated speaking in a monotone, she hated keeping everything in check. As a child, she was crazy, happy, bubbly, she was the opposite of what she had become. Growing up, she ignored the hatred and learned to tolerate until her mind and body made it seem like a regular thing.
The teen girl levitated with her legs crossed. Her hood was down with her head held up high. The cool summer breeze hit her face, the sound of the ocean in the background calmed her nerve. She chanted her montra over and over again, her heartbeat slowing down. All the thoughts that crashed through her mind from throughout the day was slowly becoming nothing to her. She slowly opened her eye, just a the sun set perfectly along the horizon. The sky an orange, red. The sun beam danced as the sun continued to set.
Ever since her last trip to evermore, which was two weeks ago, she had a hard time controlling her emotions. Lately, she's been getting dreams; not just dreams but memories. Memories of her past, when he was younger, in Azarath. She put her hood up as she walked backed inside of the tower. Everything about the dark, goth girl was off but no one seemed to notice because they were all too busy living their own life.
"Hey Rae-" she shot a look at the green changeling "-ven. Raven" he coughed out, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. His fake laughter died as he turned around, hunching his back, focusing on his game with the half man half tech. Raven could feel the emotions that spread throughout the room.
Robin was on the couch, his arm around the alien heroine. They finally had gotten together, Raven could feel all the emotions coming off of those two. She could hear their pounding heart beats, she could feel their sweat hands, she could feel their happiness, their bliss, their love toward each other. It sickened her.
"Friend Raven, would you care to join us" the red haired alien asked with a smile on her face. Raven respectfully declined as she continued to wait for the kettle to hiss. "Are you not feeling well"
"I'm fine" Raven said in the same monotone she always speaks. Raven quickly lowered her head, causing her hood to hide her face.
"BOOOYEAH, take that green monkey butt!" Cyborg yelled as he threw a fist into the air, beside him the green changeling whimpered in defeat.
"my turn!" Boy Wonder snatched the game controller and began playing against the Tin man. Beast boy stood up and walked over to Raven. He sat in front of her, elbows proped onto the table with his hands on each cheek. He let out an abnormal sigh. Raven poured hot water into her cup, she raised an eyebrow.
"What do you want beast boy" Beast boy let out a grin, showing his fang. Raven felt her heart beat fast. She secretly took a deep breathe to try and calm herself. Why does he have to look so cute- no Raven! no! Think about something else. something else. like. Waffles! wow, Waffles are actually pretty good.
"it's more like what he did!" Cyborg yelled. Beast boy sent a death glare to his best friend who was chuckling. Raven raised an eyebrow at the changeling who stood up laughing nervously, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. Her heart began to thump faster as she noticed things about him. He definitely grew up. He was now taller than her, he's muscles was showing from his uniform more than it did two years ago.
"isortakindmaybedroppedyourto othbrushintothetoilet" he said really fast while giving her a nervous smile. Raven rubbed her temples. Her head was starting to throb, the mix of emotions caused her head to pound loud enough to ring through her ears. She could feel the emotions inside her mind arguing and fighting. A warm hand touched her shoulder. "Rae are you okay?" a worried voice ask. Raven couldn't tell who it was, she was starting to black out. "Rae. Rae?" the voiced sounded confused. She could hear light bulbs exploding, the kettle on the counter explode. "Raven!"
Beast boy sat beside the half demon half human girl. He was truly worried about his friend. Something was off, he knew that Raven wasn't healing herself because she was lying on the bed. Like a human being in the hospital rather than levitating and healing herself. On the medical computer was Cyborg trying to find the cause of her passing out. "Did you find anything?" Robin asked as he entered the medical wing. Starfire was on the side of Raven.
"I'm afraid not" Starfire said looking down.
"It's like she's here, but she's not." Cyborg commented. "She's in a coma and she's not healing herself. If anything, she's letting herself die"
"Did..did I cause this?" Beast boy asked worried.
"I don't think so BB. A tooth brush dropping into a toilet wouldn't make Raven pass out like this. She destroyed the whole common room. It must be something else." Cyborg reassured as he patted his best friend on the back. "I don't have much information so I don't know what else to do. All we can do is wait."
They all stared at their friend. Wondering what on earth was going on. Suddenly, violet eyes shot open. Beast boy scooted closer as Cyborg turned to the computer. A lazy yawn escaped the mouth of the hospitalized girl. She looked around with a weird expression on her face.
"Raven?" Beast boy asked unsure. It was definitely not Raven behavior. She smiled. Beast boys eyes shot open, along with the rest of the titans.
"Hey BB!" 'Raven' said in an outgoing tone. "How's it going? mhmm, this is weird." the girl said as she slowly lifted her own limbs in confusion. The behavior of this unknown girl reminded Cyborg and Beast boy of someone, but they weren't sure. "whoaaa." she grabbed her head as she felt the pounding. "I can see why Raven was mad every time she came to visit"
That's when it clicked. "Brave?" Beast boy and Cyborg said in a unison, their eyes widen like a deer caught in the headlights. 'Brave' smiled at the two boys.
"umm friends. will you please explain who this 'brave' is?" Starfire asked, wanting to be apart of the information. Robin looked at the two mouth opened boys waiting for an explanation.
"I'm one of Raven's emotions." Brave said simply.
"Raven's emotions?" Starfire asked confused.
Brave sighed. "Okay so you know how Raven's always-" Brave paused and began her lame attempted of Raven "-I'm Raven, I must speak in a monotone tone because the monks of Azrath told me I need to control my emotions or else all havoc occurs" Brave then dropped her attempt. "Well I'm one of the reasons why. You see, our host, aka Raven, as I'm pretty sure you know how she's the portal to our evil father and what not, has to keep her emotions down. Especially rage oh boy that gets crazy! and... what was I saying again?" Brave asked as she tapped her chin.
"Explaining Raven's emotions" Robin stated.
"Oh right! As I was saying, there are other emotions in Raven's brain, which she has to keep in check. Speaking of which, BB Rage is interested in you. She's bored and you seem to be the only one who can cause Raven to get mad.-" Brave stopped in mid-sentence as she fell back onto the pillow.
"Brave?" Beast boy asked as he touched her arm. The heart monitor began to slow down.
"We're losing her!" Cyborg yelled. "Everyone out!"
"NO!" Beast boy screamed as Cyborg shoved everyone out of the room.
After a couple of hours, Robin and Starfire went off to went. Cyborg went to recharge. Leaving Raven and Beast boy alone. The heart monitor echoed throughout the room, it was faint and slow but it was there. He sat on a chair right beside her, his elbow propped on the mattress, his hand holding his head up. His eyes were slowly falling, but he wouldn't sleep. Not until Raven was okay. The changeling laughed ironically. Their relationship was really odd, one minute they're friends the next their at each others throats. He closed his eyes and let out a sigh. "Please be okay."
"umm...Beast boy" a shy voice said. Beast boy shot his head up and looked at Raven, except it wasn't Raven. This 'Raven' wrapped her arms around her knees, she hid her face with her arms from Beast boy once he shot his head up. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you!" she blurted out in a shy tone.
Beast boy rubbed his eyes. "Timid?" He opened his eyes to find her shaking. The heart monitor was still slow and faint. Beast boy took out his communicator to connect the others but Timid let out a whimper. Beast boy looked up at the fearful girl. He saw fear in her eyes, like a lost little girl. His instinct jumped in, moving from his station to sit beside Raven. He could see the fear still in her violet eyes. The changeling carefully wrapped one arm the scared girl, she snuggled closer, burying her face into the nape of his neck. His heart began to pick up speed. "um Timid. I'm gonna call the others. Is that alright?" he asked looking down, he felt her nod her head.
Seconds later, Cyborg walked into the room. He raised an eyebrow. "Are we interrupting something?" he gave Beast boy a teasing smile as Beast boy's cheeks flushed. Robin and Starfire looking confused. "You called."
"Another one of Rae's emotions" Beast boy explained, he slowly detached himself from the scared girl. "Timid to be exact."
"I-I'm sorry I'm so mean to you Starfire. I don't mean it. I'm sorry I destroyed the common room. I'm sorry I destroyed your game station. I-I didn't know what happened." Timid continued to over apologize everything. Beast boy rubbed her back as tears began to form in Timid's eyes. "I-I don't know what's going on" Timid stuttered. "I'm sorry you all have to worry about me" she said as a tear slid down her face.
Robin uncomfortably coughed, unsure what to do. "Friend do not apologize, it is alright!" Starfire reassured. "Can you tell us what happened to our Raven?"
Timid's lip began to quiver. "One of us has become more powerful. I do not understand why this must happen" Timid began to cry. Cyborg, Starfire, and Robin all backed away leaving Beast boy to do the comforting. Beast boy sighed in defeat as he pulled Timid closer.
"Timid. Which emotion lost control?" Beast boy asked in a caring tone as he brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. Timid slowly looked up, her eyes began to drop became unconscious. Beast boy held her limp body and let out an angry sigh. "So close." He gently put Raven's head back onto the pillow before sitting back on the chair. "Do you think it's rage?" Beast boy asked looking at Cyborg.
"It might be. Seeing as her emotions are taking control of her body. It could be a possibility that Rage is trying to control Raven's body." Robin theorized. Cyborg attached wires with tap to Raven's temples. "Cyborg try and guess when the next emotion will take over her body." Cyborg nodded as he continued to type on the keyboard. Robin kissed Starfire on the forehead. "You get some sleep." he then looked over at Beast boy. "you're gonna need it too Beast boy. Cyborg will watch Raven."
Beast boy nodded as the couple left. He stood up and slowly walked to the door, looking back at the girl lying there. Her faint heart beat still echoing throughout the room. "Get some sleep BB. You'll be the first person I'll call when something happens" Cyborg reassured giving his best friend a small smile. Beast boy nodded and left the room.
The half man half robot looked over at Raven's limp figure. It broke his heart to see someone like Raven in this state. He smiled a little, regardless what certain people said about the emotionless girl. He knew she was filled with emotions, he was in her head. He met every one of them. It wasn't just the fact that he's met the emotions. It was the fact that he's seen her use them. All of the. He's seen Raven's brave side every time they go to battle. How she protects the innocent and puts their life before her own. He's seen Raven's Timid side, her sad face when she discovered that Malchior used her. He's seen them all. Raven was one of the most amazing person he has ever met. What seemed to amaze him the most was how she was able to hold so much back. All the emotions that try to burst out. "Come on Raven. Pull through" he whispered before he continued to monitor her brain waves.
Beast boy tossed and turned on his bed. He couldn't sleep. Knowing that Raven wasn't well. He sighed as he stood up, changing into his uniform. He quietly walked out of his room and down the hall toward Raven's room. There had to be a hint of why she was in such a state. He carefully entered Raven's room. No one was ever allowed in this room, not after the incident with Cyborg and himself. Boy, was Raven pissed. After that incident though, they seemed to have gotten a little closer.
He sat on her bed, crossing his legs, and exhaled. "Maybe if I meditate like she did I would get an idea" he said to himself. He took several deep breathes and began to chant her montra. "Azarath Metrion Zinthos" he repeated over and over again until his body was completely relaxed. He slowly opened his eyes to find something sticking out, catching his eye. He walked over to the mountain of books and grabbed the one on top. It was a pink leather bound book, it was torn up like it had been tossed around for years. Dusting it off a bit, he realized what it was as a blushed crept his cheeks.
It was Raven's Diary. He opened the old book to the first page. In sloppy writing said the words 'Raven's Diary. DO NOT READ...OR ELSE'. Beside the 'or else' was a terrible drawing of a monster. Beast boy found himself laughing. He turned to the next page and began to read.
Dear Whatever this is,
The monks told me that this is the perfect way to get a control of my emotions so I won't turn into an evil portal to transfer what his name to earth or something. I never really understand what they say sometimes. Mother says that I have keep my emotions inside. Which stinks! I can't play like the other kids, I can't smile or laugh. I do not understand, but mother and the monks say that I will understand once I'm older. Being a kid sucks! But at least they give me ice cream when I'm good. -
His communicator went off, signalling that Raven had woken up. Beast boy put the book back and rushed out of Raven's room. He ran down the hall, catching up with Starfire to where Cyborg is. They entered the room to find that 'Raven' was slouching with a a bunch of empty hamburger wrappers surrounding her. Robin and Cyborg stared at awe as she devoured an hamburger with one bite.
She then burped and laughed. "Boy am I stuffed!"
"You should be! You ate like fifty cheeseburgers!" Cyborg yelled waving his hands in the air. "I didn't know Raven could eat that much!"
'Raven' laughed. "HA! She sneaks down in the middle of the night and eats everything. Monkey butt doesn't have sleep walking food hunger. It's all Rae-Rae." She put her hands behind her head and yawned as a burp came out.
"Rude." Cyborg and Beast boy said in obvious voice.
"Great job tin man and greenie" Rude said sarcastically.
"This is were Raven gets all her sarcasm from" Beast boy muttered. Out of all the emotions, he hated Rude. Rude grinned as she gave Beast boy a thumbs up. "Rude." Beast boy sighed, he knew this was going to be hard. "Where's Rae"
"Right here idiot" Rude said obviously, pointing to herself. "Maybe all those shape shifts are starting to affect your small brain?" Beast boy glared at rude. "Awe come on short stuff. It's not fun unless you play back!" Robin looked at Cyborg for more clarification. "Last time I saw brainless over here, we got into this big epic fight. Brave had to hold me down. So baldy, care to explain to me why I'm all wired up!"
Cyborg popped a tick mark. "Well Ms. Rude with an attitude" Cyborg walked over to the computer. "We're trying to see when Rage comes up to take over Raven's body"
Rude busted out into a laugh fit. Kicking her legs into the air while clutching onto her stomach. The four titans backed up, confused and scared of this side of Raven. "Rude isn't trying to control Rae's body. No one is. I think." Rude tapped her chin. "yep no one is. Rae-rae's having a hard time controlling us rascals, especially a certain emotion. From what I remember last, Rae had to lock her into a cage so she wouldn't get out. But Brave being brave set her free along with rage and everything is chaos." Rude explained. "Thing is Rae's not home. Only we are, we have no idea where our host even went."
"That explains why her heart rate is slow" Cyborg calculated something into the computer. "It also explains why Raven hasn't been able to heal herself. She's not in there."
"Then where is she" Robin asked, looking back at Raven who was now unconscious.
I hoped you guys enjoyed this chapter of Broken !
okay, I need to fan girl. I'm having a teen titans marathon and reliving my childhoold lol. And I was watching the episode The End, I forgot which part, but anyways. Beast boy totally turned into the beast. For Raven. boom. enough said. lol.