Donna walked down the street, hands in her pockets, shoulders hunched against the cold wind. She wondered if it really was colder this year, or if it was just her imagination. She felt tired, so tired, as though a great weight were pressing her down, slowing her steps. If she could just get a job, do something useful. It might help her forget how they ended up here in Leeds, with London gone, and anything like normal life seeming impossibly far away.
None of the neighbors were out, but she caught glimpses through windows that weren't boarded up. She could see the worn faces of those that were left, the ones who hadn't been taken away to work camps. She tried not to think about what those camps might really be. "None of this was meant to happen," the mysterious woman had said. Even if that were true, what then?
She stopped in front of the building housing the local army contingent. A young soldier with tired eyes let her in, and she approached the soldier at the desk.
"I'd like to see about a job," she said.
The soldier looked her up and down, then looked back at the paperwork on his desk. "Sorry, miss, nothing available."
"Oh, come on, everyone needs a secretary. I can type 100 words per minute, and I'm a fast learner."
"Don't need secretaries," he said. He looked back up at her. "Any medical experience? We do need medics or nurses."
She shook her head. "No, but I could learn," she said, hope rising briefly in her chest.
"No, we don't have time to train anyone, nor anyone to do the training," he said curtly.
"Please, I'll do anything. I need a job. My family needs me to work. I need to work. What's the use of having you lot around?" She hated the sound of desperation in her voice.
He looked away again. "Sorry, can't help you. Lots of people need jobs, you're nothing special."
Nothing special. She felt the words as a physical blow, confirming how she felt. This had been her last hope. If the army wasn't hiring, no one was. There was no one else. She felt like shouting, screaming at the world. She turned and left, walking back the way she came.
That night, she lay awake in her camp bed, listening to her grandfather snore softly. She thought of her mother confirming her worst fear, that she had always been a disappointment. About the soldier saying she was nothing special. About the blonde woman who said she was important. Who said she was going to die. About the man in the suit who appeared in her dreams, holding out his hand to her. About the coming darkness. She felt the walls closing in. All of this was wrong. She closed her eyes. She knew what she had to do. She was ready.