The Other Kindergarten Stories

Disclaimer: All of the characters and whatnot belong to Mr. Joss Whedon. The idea behind this was first brought up in seventh season episode "The Killer In Me".

Sunnydale Elementary School

Playground

1986

"I declare that I'm King of the Sandbox," Xander Harris, an energetic five-year-old, exclaimed proudly as he stood on top of a mountain of sand in the sandbox on the playground at Sunnydale Elementary School. His hands and feet were covered in sand, but he would remain there. It was his duty as king.

"What about me?" his girlfriend Willow Rosenberg asked as she stood up next to him. She straightened out her pink overalls as she looked at Xander, waiting eagerly for his reply.

"Well, of course you're the queen," Xander said with a smile as he moved over slightly on his mountain. He grabbed Willow's and pulled her closer so that the young redhead on one foot on the mountain.

Willow smiled triumphantly. "An' we'll live in a really big house an' wear pretty clothes that'll make Cordelia look ugly," she added with a wicked smile.

"Yea," Xander said happily as he gave Willow a high five.

"What'll I do?" Jesse asked curiously as he looked up at his two friends. "I wanna be part of the plan!"

"Um, you can be the watch guard!" Willow suggested. "You look out for the bad guys like Cordelia and Harmony!"

Jesse smiled as he moved to the edge of the sandbox. "Awesome," he commented. "I'm in." He scanned the playground for any possible intruders just as he was told to do. His faced wrinkled to a frown as he saw some headed their way. "Intruders," he announced as he walked over in front of Willow and Xander.

Xander straightened himself out as he saw the three people Jesse was referring to-Cordelia Chase, Harmony Kendall, and Mitch O'Keeffe. "We were here first," he declared.

Harmony rolled her eyes. "Too bad, losers," she said in disgust.

"Yea," Cordelia added. "We want to be here now, so you losers should leave."

"No," Xander argued back strongly. "We were here first," he stated again.

"So?" Cordelia asked. "My daddy paid for this to be here. I want to play in it."

"You know what you are, Cordelia?" Xander asked as he stepped down from the mountain of sand. "You're a meanie," he yelled at her.

"Hey!" Mitch put in. "We wanna play, so get out of here."

"Make us," Jesse challenged.

Mitch shrugged. "Ok, we will," he said as he lunged forward. The three "losers" in the sandbox knew what it meant. They were being chased. They glanced at each other before splitting up and running to different parts of the playground. Harmony started chasing after Willow; Mitch ran after Jesse; while Cordelia followed Xander.

While they were busy running, Jonathan Levinson shrugged. He noticed the sandbox was free, so he walked over and started playing in it peacefully.

"You're a dead man, Xander Harris," Cordelia called as she continued running after Xander.

"Not uh!" Xander immediately argued. He would keep running as long as he had to. He could feel his pants starting to slip down, but he paid no attention to it. He had to get away from Cordelia. In his running flee, he failed to notice that his pants had completely fallen down. Seconds later, he tripped over them and landed on the grass in front of the swings.

Cordelia stopped running just in time to avoid tripping over Xander. She glanced down at the boy she had been chasing and started to laugh. The few students on the swings stopped and jumped off, all of them eagerly gathering around Xander.

The laughter started as they all looked down at Xander in his t-shirt and aquaman underwear. His pants were still hanging around his ankles.

"Stop it," Xander yelled as he pulled himself up. "It isn't funny!" he added as he started pulling his pants back up. By this point, Willow, Jesse, Mitch, Harmony, and the rest of the kindergarten class had gathered around him. Xander looked helplessly at his two friends, both of whom were trying desperately to hold back their laughter.

"You laugh now," Xander muttered. "But some day you won't have any pants, and I'll be the one laughing!"

The large gathering of students had caught the attention of the kindergarten teacher, Ms.Peterson, and she was now standing near the group trying to calm things down. "Ok," she said loudly. "Recess is over. Let's get back inside."