Prologue: The Killing Moon
I know Edward isn't coming back, I know it every day that I spend without him. I will never see him again. The Cullen's are gone; every trace of them has been washed away from Forks, but not from me. Not from my heart.
Under blue moon I saw you
So soon you'll take me
Up in your arms
Too late to beg you or cancel it
Though I know it must be the killing time
Unwillingly mine
His voice speaks to me; forever humming the lullaby he wrote for me, performed for me the day Edward took me to meet his parents or his parents for all intensive purposes. I never once saw it coming that day, Edward had been distant but never in a million years would I have thought that he would tell me that he didn't love me anymore, that he was leaving Forks. Foolishly for the first couple of months I let myself believe that he was leaving for me, because he loved me too much. Because he didn't want to steal a real life away from me when I had repeatedly told him that he was my life.
Fate
Up against your will
Through the thick and thin
He will wait until, until
You give yourself to him
Charlie is at his wits ends, he doesn't know what to do with me, and he's threatening to send me to Jacksonville to my mother if I don't start snapping out of this coma like state that I prefer to live in. How can I live without Edward? Did I put too much faith in him and his word? Doesn't everyone in love to that to themselves? But I don't want to go to Jacksonville without Edward I am a shell of what I used to be, but to leave the place where he once loved me would break me all together.
In starlit nights I saw you
So cruelly you kissed me
Your lips a magic world
Your sky all hung with jewels
The killing moon
Will come too soon
But I have to learn to live again, learn to live in a world without Edward Cullen. Seems impossible but it has to be done. Nothing can cover this hole in my heart, the piece of my heart that Edward took with him when he left the piece of himself that he had given me that he so cruelly ripped away with no cause for explanation. Ever girl goes through relationships that don't last, but other girls hadn't found their soul mate, they hadn't met Edward Cullen. Ten thousand times a day I see his face, ten thousand times I hear his voice, ten thousand times I think that he is right around the corner and I can catch up to him if I just run fast enough.
Fate
Up against your will
Through the thick and thin
He will wait until
You give yourself to him
But I will never catch up with him. Edward made it all to clear that he didn't love me on that last day, that he wanted nothing more to do with me. He took every shred of evidence that had ever proven he hadn't all been a dream. One amazing, beautiful, dream.
Under blue moon I saw you
So soon you'll take me
Up in your arms
Too late to beg you or cancel it
Though I know it must be the killing time
Unwillingly mine.
Maybe he was a dream, someone I simply made up to make life in Forks bearable, I had sent myself to Forks so my mother could be happy when I didn't really want to be here in this sunless place, this valley of darkness and rain. Maybe Edward Cullen was my own personal punishment for having false feelings. Trying to be the Saint, putting myself in the shadows of my crazy mom could stand in the sun.
Give yourself to him
Unwillingly mine
I know it must be the killing time.
______________________________________________________________________
A/N: This is the prologue to The Killing Moon. The song title is The Killing Moon and it is by Echo and the Bunnymen, I thought that the song really fit for where I am leading the story. Also the last bar of the song is not part of the song; I just made up that part because I didn't want to end it with the same repeated line from the song. Updating soon hopefully by the first of the year so keep watching and give me some reviews and I will love you forever. Also this is my first attempt at personal POV instead of third person.
