Love Over A Cup Of Coffee-- Olivia is stressed out and needs some comfort from the one person she wants it to be from most.
* I do not own these characters, they are owned by Dick Wolf unfortunately *
It was just another long, hard, emotional and energy draining day for detective Olivia Benson. You would think that after so many years, either on the crime scene itself or in the squad room, that rape cases and homicides grow old to the ear, that they become an everyday routine, and that eventually, the daily stress turns into a cold spot in your heart in which you no longer feel. That was never the case for Olivia. She couldn't speak for the other detectives or cops that worked in the crime filled city of New York, but for herself, all she could say that it was another day, passing by the horrors of the world.
It was a day cut early, however. It was only 6:30, still bright as day, but yet, not something too exciting. Sure, it drags her away from the ills of her daily career, but it also brought her closer to the loneliness at home. A few beers in the fridge, a few pictures on the wall, some decent channels on the television--- but never anyone home to share them with. There wasn't anyone to laugh with her, there wasn't anyone to pop a bottle of wine with, there wasn't anyone to just sit with her and pass the time doing nothing.
She drove her car for a few blocks, but stopped. She sighed as she turned off the ignition and dropped her body in distress. She rubbed her forehead, brainstorming on how her life needed some sort of reform. She thought of how she needed someone to shed the least bit of light, in such a small, dark world. Yes, New York was a big city--- yet, filled with such loneliness and emptiness, as Olivia sat around thinking about that one person.
She looked through the contacts on her phone, to call the one person who she needed to be a familiar in her life; even though she had already seen that one person on a daily basis, it wasn't in the way that Olivia's life urged to have.
"Cabot, ADA," the familiar but husky voice answered.
"Hello, Alex," Olivia greeted.
"Hi 'Liv," her voice softened, "Is everything alright?"
"Have you ever felt like your life was missing something, and you needed something, just one small thing, to fill that empty space in your heart?"
"Wow, Olivia, someone's been a little too focused on their job. Maybe you should talk to Cragen and tell him you need a couple of vacation days taken up, you know, to relax."
"This isn't about my job. This is about my life, Alex. My career is a big part of it, but in the end of it all, I don't want that to be my entire life."
"I've never heard you so emotional, 'Liv. Maybe all you need is some small talk and a little bit of coffee. Are you at home right now, or are you out?"
"I'm in my car, parked in front of a coffee shop."
She laughed, blushing so slightly. "Well that's perfect. I'm guessing you're at Joe's Donuts up the block. I'll be there in five minutes. Please don't do anything stupid, or at least, until I get there, so I can stop you and tell you that you're doing something stupid."
"What stupid thing could I possibly do to myself parked in front of a coffee shop?"
"Demand for the hottest coffee and the coldest donut for a deadly, out of this world combination."
Olivia smiled, her vision becoming dull and her heart trembling as she hung up. It was that butterfly-like feeling you'd get with your first love; it was like nothing else mattered.
She sat in the car waiting. As the minutes passed, she felt her heart slowing, but yet, pacing faster as she awaited the beautiful face she had missed so much. She closed her eyes, imagining Alex's beautiful features. She blissfully drifted off as she dreamt of her sweet, blue eyes. She fantasized of meeting her soft, pink lips with her own lips. She imagined running her fingers through her silky blonde hair. She always has.
Suddenly, she felt something cold touch her temple. She was startled, at first, assuming it was a gun pointed to her head.
"Don't move," her angelic voice murmured.
"Alex, you scared the crap out of me," she turned towards her, smiling, though still slightly panting off the scare.
"For such a well praised detective you sure know how to leave yourself open for danger."
Olivia smirked and they walked inside to order their coffee. Alex assumed that whatever Olivia had felt was too personal to discuss in a coffee shop, so she concluded that they should drink their coffee in Olivia's car. Once Olivia slammed her door closed, and once Alex gracefully slipped into the passenger's side, Alex looked at Olivia puzzlingly for some answers.
"We're not in the courtroom, Alex," Olivia joked, "You don't need to stare me down like that, like you're waiting for my confession."
"No, but I need you to talk to me. When you called me the way you did, I was worried about you, more than I ever have been."
Alex's concern and care for Olivia gave her a chill in her heart. "Well, it's just, I mean, being on the job so long, you'd think you'd grow so used to it. I mean, not exactly the daily story, or the headlines, but the loneliness and inner darkness that it brings you; that feeling where you know the world is a cruel place, and just a place where you may never find something to show you that everything isn't always a dark hole."
"Olivia, I know you may find it hard to believe, but not the entire world is cruel. Yes, everyday, you wake up in the morning, knowing there's another woman who's been raped, or another child that's been murdered, and that there's some man out there, laughing that he got away, but that's only a percentage… back there, in that squad room, you have a family. You have people who are always concerned about you. In that squad room, it isn't a job anymore, it's a lifestyle. Olivia, I know that that's hard to believe, considering your mother was an alcoholic, and your father was a rapist, and that you're a mere product of a crime--- but the world doesn't have the be a black hole because there's terrible things. It's simply life because there are terrible things."
"I always thought that maybe Elliot was the only best friend I've ever had, but perhaps you know me better than him sometimes, perhaps you may even know me better than I even know myself."
"Best friend? Is that what you think I am?"
Olivia stumbled, emotionally, and paused in a way where her current emotions were unknown to her, but definitely were not anything well.
"Olivia," Alex continued, "Everyday when I walk into that squad room, you are the first person I look at. When I leave, you are the last person I say goodbye to. Every night, before I go to sleep, I lay down in my bed, staring at the ceiling, trying to figure out two things; why I felt so lonely without you there with me at night, and how you felt about me. We don't have to be together for me to imagine me, one day, being able to stand up and say that I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
Olivia's face relaxed into Alex's words.
"God," Alex said, "this is such a terrible rant for a first date… I'm sorry, I've said too much."
"First date; is that what you think this is?" Olivia asked, laughing, "This was merely bait."
"Did you get a good catch?" Alex asked innocently.
"The best catch."
Olivia's breath grew short, as did Alex's, and Olivia's eyes slowly shut as she lingered her finger along Alex's chin, luring her in for a kiss; a soft, sweet, passionate kiss that made the rest of the cruel, dark world unknown and forgotten. Instead, the sun was shining, birds were singing, and she was finally no longer in a fantasy. This was real, and this was love. This was Olivia Benson, kissing Alex Cabot, the beautiful, and the light.