Ask the Axis!

by Sketch and Beats

The adventures of Beats and the Axis boys! This can't end well... Read to find out! :-D Rated T for... Well, for Beats. Human names will be used. And also, I don't own Hetalia. All rights to the characters go to the guy who created them. I know his name, I just can't spell it. I only own the story and myself.

1. Welcome To the Show!

"Hi! Welcome to 'Ask the Axis!' Say hi guys!" Beats said, er, more like commanded.

"Hiya!" Italy said happily.

"Herro..." said Japan.

Unlike everyone else, Germany was being a pissypants today. "Hi." he grumbled, earning a glare from Beats.

"Oh Luddy lighten up. Not the readers fault Prussia ate all your wurst and drank all your beer." Beats said, annoyed at his behavior.

Germany sighed. "Don't call me zat. Jou vill refer to me as Germany, my real name, or Deutschland."

I stuck my tongue out at him. "Luddy Luddy Luddy. Problem?"

"Why jou little-"

"THE COUNTRY OF BEATSILVANIYA(1) IS NOT LITTLE! I CAN KICK YOUR SALTY GERMAN BUTT!" I said, about ready to bite his head off.

"Oh really?" Germany said, pulling his gun out.

"HELL YEAH BRING IT ON DEUTCHY!" I yelled, pulling out a bazooka and aiming it at Germany.

"Germany-san, Beats-chan, prease carm down." Japan said.

"But Kiku he started it!" I said.

"Prease?" Japan asked.

"Fine... But you owe me. Now I can't shoot anybody!" I sighed. Japan whispered something in my ear that made me go beet red and faint.

"Beats!" Germany said, catching me as I fell.

"Japan, what did you-a say to-a Beats?" the Italian asked.

"I tord her that I'd draw her a picture of a certian person shirtress." he stated, looking over at Germany who was tending to the unconscious me.

"Who?" Italy asked, not getting the hint.

Japan sighed, "He has bronde hair and brue eyes."

"Big-a brother France?"

Japan facepalmed. "No."

"America?"

"Try again Itary."

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ~! Doits-"

Japan covered his mouth before he could say it. If Germany knew, he'd kill Japan.

"Beats vake up! Zhey made bacon flavored ice cream!" Germany said, shaking her.

Japan walked over and poked Beats. "Beats-chan, they finarry made OtakuRand."

My head shot up. "HELL YEAH I GET A SHIRTLESS PICTURE OF WEST AND OTAKULAND OPENED!"

"VHAT?!"

" ^.^ Bye Germany!" I grabbed Japan and ran into my room, locking the door.

"OPEHN ZHIS DOOR ZHIS INSZANT!" Germany yelled, banging on the door.

"NEVAR!" I yelled, grabbing my spoon just in case he got in.

"Alright, thats all folks! PM me a question!"

"BEATS I VILL BREAK ZHIS DOOR DOWN!"

I'm going to die. ~_~

(1) Beats thinks she's the country of Beatsilvaniya.