Lovino still wondered to this day how he ended up sort of cuddling in bed with two men beside him.
His idiot of a lover though stated affectionately was curled on one side, snoring away as if he needed sleep like no one else did.
His 'calmer' lover lay on his other side sound asleep in a much more quiet and subdued way.
Lovino stared at the two before sighing and moving to get more comfortable by the other two men though he knew the past few months had slowly been making his insomnia worse and been letting his mind wander almost constantly to all the things that could go wrong.
He was the worrier of the three of them while Antonio was the passionate one that could chase worries away with the heat of his actions be them something innocent or not.
Heracles was the soothing one with his soft spoken and well thought out words that could ease pain into the back of another's mind.
The fact that both were asleep did not really help in Lovino's case who could only feel left out; he was the youngest of the three and the most foul tempered.
He figured that there was no way that they would still see him as charming or lovable as time went on despite the fact that he cared for them immensely.
The Italian of the three also worried about how easily it seemed that they could fall apart, the three of them becoming single from some choice or another.
He fought to contain his insecure grumbling and keep it solely in his head as Heracles made some kind of grunt in his sleep and curled ever closer to the Southern Italian.
Lovino fought to close his eyes as he felt the gentle brush of tan skin against his own as Antonio curled closer as if desiring simply for Lovino's warmth and the comfort of proximity though Lovino could not stop the nagging thought that if he was not in the bed with them that Antonio would be curled up against Heracles as if without a care for what he could have lost.
The Southern Italian forced his thoughts away from his worries and concerns and tried to focus on how good it felt to be sandwiched between two exceptional men and how comforting that could potentially be for his insecurities as he felt the gentle breaths on his skin and the warmth of physical contact.
He soothed himself to sleep with the warm bodies beside him though he'd wake up only a matter of hours later to a colder bed and the smell of food cooking, sizzling through his house.
It hurt to be like this, to think like this, and of course, to have his insecurities keep him up as he tried not to focus on missing the warmth of arms eager to loop around his waist as he stared down at the city below him, wine glass held carefully in hand.
He could hear his brother's annoying humming as the Italian in the other room probably thought of the girl he'd fallen for more recently.
Lovino, bitterly longed for the Northern Italian to somehow comprehend his pain, the pain of feeling as if you had become an irrelevant third wheel to your own love life.
The Southern Italian listened as the humming suddenly broke off and his brother appeared by his side.
"How's Heracles? I heard that you and Antonio had allowed him to move in with you." Feliciano leaned against the balcony rails, sans wineglass.
"He's fine. They're both fine." Lovino was quick to amend as he watched the other Italian almost jealously as he didn't need wine right now to calm his nerves and give him a new kind of thought to focus on nor was he involved with two people at once which can sometimes breed insecurities and leave one feeling more like an accessory than an actual part of the romance when one's insecurities had their say.
"You don't seem too happy. Is Antonio being annoying?" The words stumbled their way out of the Northerner's mouth as if determined to leave their mark on him too.
"Not really." Lovino wasn't very open about his insecurities and neither had he let his brother know about the sudden switch in his own relationship's dynamic.
"Please tell me what's wrong." Feli's eyes were ones that could easily admit to difficulties and heartache, and Lovino couldn't look away when his wineglass was stolen from him only for the other Italian to take a long sip from it as if he, too, was nervous.
"Nothing's really wrong, idiota." It fell from his lips so very easily as if the lie was more forthcoming than the truth though lies never really stopped his brother.
"Lovi, you can't fix a problem if you keep it to yourself." The Northerner murmured as he stared somberly into his eyes, and it seemed so heartbreaking to see his younger brother look so sad with a wineglass full of wine in his hands.
"Here." Lovino took the wineglass away and looked down at the street below, temporarily missing the warmth of two warm bodies, each at one of his sides.
"Even if you don't tell me what's wrong, you must tell them." Feliciano murmured, and in that, he, too, was right.
Lovino sighed and refused to look away from the streets below, full of busy humans with too much on their plates, just like him.
"You're right, but I don't think that I can." What was he to find insecurity in their loving relationship?
"Okay." Feli hummed, still looking sad as if a painter had painted him in the wrong light, as he was still supposed to be happy as he usually appeared to be.
"Don't be sad for my sake." It was quiet and nearly insecure in its own right, but definitely spoken of love and a desire for the other one's happiness.
"I will be happy if you will." He smiled briefly for a moment as he leaned forward to peck his brother's cheek, wishing his brother happiness in the only way he seemed to know how.
It was a spectacle to see two men race down the hallway of the hotel that he was in and burst into his room; sometimes he was sure that both of them were completely nuts.
Antonio had probably been the one to make Heracles go nuts after all.
"Are you okay, Lovi? Feli said that you were wallowing in sorrow and-" The Spaniard cut himself off as if he'd said something that he shouldn't have as he pulled his shorter lover into his arms.
"I'm fine." Lovino grumbled, already feeling the urge to strangle his brother for saying too much to them.
"You aren't fine." It was the statement by Heracles that stopped Lovino short and forced him to look at the newest addition to his love life.
"I-You won't always love me. I'm irritable and impossible to deal with, and you, both, get along so well without me." It rushed forward from Lovino's lips without the command that it should have needed to do so; he immediately regretted saying that much.
"Lovi, Lovi, we love you!" Antonio chorused as if that were all the reassurance in the world.
"You care deeply. You try everything in your power to make sure we're always happy." Heracles started them off.
"You're cute, and you are so adorably loving to us. We'd never get along without you." Antonio continued on after hearing Heracles's answer.
"But I'm just the third wheel to this relationship." He stared down into Antonio's eyes and found himself biting his lip while he stared.
"No, you're not Lovi. You put the two of us at peace. You always remind us of how much we love each other. I don't think we'd even be complete without you." It was soft, and Lovino wondered how Antonio had known just the things to say.
"I couldn't imagine being with just Antonio, not that I don't love him, it just wouldn't be the same without you." Heracles stood firm on that claim as he stared into their Italian's eyes.
"I love you, both." Lovino muttered, just wishing that insecurities were easy to remove, not implanted in a person; for now, he'd try to ignore those pesky thoughts out of love and respect for the two that he'd fallen for.
"I'm sorry for not making you feel loved enough." Antonio murmured regardless and leaned forward to kiss those lips and feel the quickening pulse of the one that he'd loved for as long as he could remember.
Heracles leaned forward to embrace them both, and suddenly they were three again, equal and in love.